Season of Change
by emmakaterina
Summary: Hotch and Beth start their New Year off with a bang - but that's the least surprising thing about their year. For all the people who want more Hotch/Beth content in their lives.
1. Chapter 1

Authors note: So I've been rewatching the series and have been struck by how serious Hotch and Beth's relationship got. She wasn't in very many episodes but by the end of season 8 we see them saying "I love you" to each other and Beth spending one on one time with Jack. Even though they broke up and Hotch isn't even on the show any more I decided I wanted to expand on their relationship. Not going to lie - the timeline might not fit with the show to a tee because I don't think it will affect the plot of the story. Also Emily will be replacing Blake in this story just because I like her better. This is set after Beth moves to NYC.

Chapter 1

Dec 31st/Jan 1st

"Three! Two! One! Happy New Year!"

Everyone cheered and clinked their champagne glasses as they watched the ball drop on the screen. Hotch turned to look at Beth and he smiled.

"Happy New Year" he whispered, just to her.

"Happy New Year" she said back just as softly.

Hotch leaned in and captured her lips with his own. Their first kiss of the new year. It was short but with a hint of a promise of more to come. As Hotch downed the rest of his champagne he caught a glimpse of Will and JJ still in the midst of their passionate New Years kiss. He chuckled to himself, he was trying to be more open and human in front of the team but he had to admit, he was glad they weren't quite _that_ open.

"Happy New Year, Daddy!" Jack ran towards his dad and Hotch bent town to envelop him in a hug.

"Happy New Year, buddy! What do you think, Jack? Is 2013 going to be our best year yet?"

Jack nodded enthusiastically.

"Go grab your toys and say goodbye to Henry, bud. It's way past your bedtime."

Jack looked disappointed but didn't argue and ran off to find his friend and collect the things he had brought to Rossi's.

"And what about you, my love? Do you think 2013 will be our best year yet?"

"Mmm. I have high hopes, Hotchner. Very high hopes." Beth responded coyly.

They said their goodbyes to the team and JJ, Will and Henry followed them out. The rest of the team had gone a bit too heavy on the champagne and would be staying in one of Rossi's many guest bedrooms.

Hotch drove them back to his place, Beth's hand resting on his thigh was surprisingly distracting. He thought they were making the long distance relationship work but god maybe he had missed her more than he had realized. Beth glanced at Jack in the backseat clearly glued to whatever game he was playing on his tablet.

"So," she half whispered to Hotch. "Do you think they'll have sex?"

Hotch gave her a confused glance. "Who?"

"Derek and Penelope! I couldn't help but notice they shared a kiss as the ball dropped."

Hotch laughed. "Oh I don't doubt that they did. But I'm sure that's the extent of it.

Beth gave him an unconvinced look.

"Trust me. I've worked with those two for nearly a decade now and the constant flirting is just how they roll. Any real sexual contact would ruin their relationship. For them, the fun is in the constant talk without the real game."

"Hm so the exact opposite of you then?" Beth remarked with her signature giggle attached to the end of it.

"Hey!" Hotch tried to sound offended. "I talk the talk and walk the walk."

"Aaron Hotchner I don't think you could talk dirty if you tried" Beth was still laughing at him.

He glanced back and noted that Jack still had his headphones in and his eyes on the tablet, completely oblivious to their adult conversation.

"I'll tell you what when I get you home and in bed we're starting this new year off with a bang, do you hear me?"

Beth laughed loudly and finally piqued Jack's attention.

"What's so funny, Beth."

Hotch answered before Beth had the chance to.

"We're almost home buddy. Put the tablet away."

Jack sighed and took out the headphones and placed the tablet in the pocket on the back of the driver's seat. He was only allowed to use it on special occasions.

"Can Beth read me some of my book before I go to bed?"

"No buddy, it's nearly 1 in the morning. We're brushing teeth and going straight to bed."

"But Dad!" Jack's voice got extra whiny. Like it did only when he was extra tired. "Beth leaves again tomorrow and we need to find out if Hagrid knows what Fluffy is guarding!"

Beth could see the boy starting to get emotional and it hurt her heart but she knew it wasn't her place to undermine Aaron's parenting.

"It's okay, Jack. My train back to the city isn't until 5PM. We'll have plenty of time to read Harry Potter tomorrow, okay buddy. I promise."

Jack quieted and they pulled into the parking lot for Hotch's building. Beth kept herself busy getting ready for bed while Aaron helped Jack. He came out of Jack's room to find Beth in her pajamas in the kitchen pouring them both another glass of wine. Aaron put on an Otis Redding record just loud enough to fill the kitchen and living room without disturbing Jack.

"I've Been Loving You Too Long," Beth smiled. "One of my favorites."

Hotch held out one of his hands and Beth gladly accepted. She stepped into his embrace and they swayed as Otis sang. Hotch held their clasped hands to his chest as his other hand laid low on her back. Beth rested her arm on his shoulder as her hand found its place at the nape of his neck rubbing her fingers through his short hair.

"Hmm" Hotch murmured in contentment and used the hand on her back to press her body even closer against his. "I've missed you."

Beth didn't reply. Just let him hold her close as they danced until the end of the song. As the last few notes of the song played she leaned back and looked up at him. He bent down and placed his lips on hers. Moving her hands to his waist she held onto him and deepened the kiss pulling his bottom lip between hers. She felt Aaron slide his hands from the small of her back down lower to her bottom before starting the journey back up.

"Daddy?'

Hotch broke off the kiss like a bucket of cold water had been dumped on his head. And in a way… it had. Jack was standing in the hallway facing the two of them, clearly a witness to what they had been doing. Beth turned the other way partly amused and party embarrassed. She tried to regain composure before allowing herself to be apart of the conversation.

"Jack, you're supposed to be in bed." his tone gave little room for argument.

"I got thirsty" Jack said quietly looking at the floor.

"Go back to bed and I'll bring you some water in a minute."

Jack scurried back into his bedroom and Hotch sighed. He headed for the kitchen and pulled down one of Jack's water bottles. As he filled it up and took it to Jack's room Beth picked up the untouched glasses of wine and set them on the coffee table before sitting herself down onto the couch. Hotch joined her a moment later picking up one of the wine glasses and taking a long gulp before sitting down with her.

"Is he scarred for life?" Beth asked. They'd kissed before in front of Jack. But always chaste hello or goodbye kisses. Nothing like what he'd just been witness to.

"I don't think he was standing there for long. Besides, I think it's good that he see us be affectionate with each other. Granted not _that _affectionate but still. I want him to know what a healthy relationship looks like."

Beth smiled softly at him. "I love you. I don't want to go back to New York tomorrow"

"I don't want you to go back either. But we've been lucky to have this time together over the holidays." He pulled her foot into his lap and started massaging it as they talked.

"See! This is what I am talking about! How am I supposed to go home to an empty apartment when here I have a man who rubs my feet! I can't wait another year before we're able to spend this much time together Aaron."

"Beth, even when we were living in the same city. My job. It takes me away so often there was rarely times we saw each other this many consecutive days in a row."

"I know. But at least it seemed possible, you know. There were evenings, and morning coffees, and lunches when you could sneak away. Even when the time was limited as least there were more opportunities."

"What are you saying?" Hotch asked cautiously.

"I'm saying I don't think New York is where I want to live anymore." Beth looked up at him. "I love my job. And I love the city. But there is so much more here that I miss and -"

Hotch stood up and pulled her up with him. He wrapped his arms around her and held her against him. "You don't have to decide anything right now. I know it seems impossible to go back after we've been together for this long but just give it a try. Settle back into your routine and see how you feel. If you still want to move back, I'll be on the first train over to help you pack up your stuff. If you decide you want to stick it out in New York a little longer, that's okay too."

He felt Beth nod against his chest.

"Okay then. It's getting late and I believe I still have a promise to fulfill from the car."

Beth giggled as Hotch lead them to his bedroom. They shut the door gently and Hotch wasted no time in pulling Beth back into his arms and continuing their passionate kiss from earlier. Beth moaned into his mouth and started unbuttoning his shirt. She made quick work of them and soon she was forcing Hotch to release his hold on her as she pushed the shirt off his shoulders and down his arms. She rid herself of her edgy purple leather jacket at the same time.

"God damn it's a miracle I've waited as long as I've had to jump you given what you're wearing." Beth giggled as Hotch thoroughly looked her up and down. She had chosen a black jumpsuit to wear. It was rather form fitting and more low cut than she would usually dare to wear. But she had wanted to look hot for her boyfriend and her best friend had promised her that it was the perfect mix of classy and sexy.

"Now turn around so I can get you out of that thing." Hotch slowly lowered the zipper from the middle of her back down to her bum. He didn't fail to notice that she wasn't wearing a bra and as he slipped the straps from her shoulders she turned back around to face him. She shimmied out of the jumpsuit and her black lacy underwear at the same time leaving her fully nude and Hotch still with his pants on.

"I believe you have some catching up to do." She said as she looked Hotch in the eyes.

It was one of the increasing number of times she had left him speechless. He was quick to rid himself of his belt and Beth stepped in to help unbutton his pants and pull down his zipper. She pulled his pants and briefs down far enough to expose him and she saw he was more than ready for her. She dropped to her knees and took him into her mouth before he had time to process her actions. He groaned in approval when he felt her warm mouth around him.

She was good at this. Too good at this. He should ask how she got this good. Nevermind he didn't want to know.

"Ahhh" Hotch groaned as she took him all the way into the back of her throat. Her nose pressed against his dark curls.

"Babe," he struggled to form coherent words. "Babe you need to stop or this night is going to be over long before we want it to be."

Beth glanced up at him and god he swore it was the sexiest thing he ever saw. She slowly backed her way off of his cock and released him with an audible "pop".

"You're a dangerous, dangerous woman." Hotch said to her and Beth just grinned in response. He pushed her onto the bed and got in on top of her. He found her lips once more and as he kissed her he entered her forcefully.

Beth broke off their kiss as he entered her and moaned loudly. She buried her face into Aaron's neck and he repeatedly entered her not slowing his place. Her moans increased in frequency as did his and she could tell that he was getting close.

He reached down between them and rubbed her clit as he entered her hoping to help her cross the finish line sooner rather than later.

Hotch made a carnal noise and she felt him release inside of her. The noises coming from Hotch combined with his fingers on her clit and him still inside of her she had no choice but to let go and come with him.

She let out strangled gasps and she felt her body spasming around his. She clutched onto him tight fearing he would retreat before she had come back to Earth. Slowly their breaths evened and Hotch placed a kiss on her sweaty forehead. She released her vice like grip from around him and slowly he pulled out and laid on his side next to her. He reached out and grabbed a tissue from the nightstand to clean himself up before kissing the side of her head.

"You should get up and pee before you get too tired and fall asleep." Hotch reminded her.

Beth turned her head and smiled softly at him. She leaned in and gave him another soft kiss on his lips before heeding his advice and rolling out of bed and heading to the bathroom. He took the opportunity to put on a new pair of briefs and she came out of the bathroom in one of his t-shirts and a pair of sleep shorts. They laid next to each other her head on his chest and legs intertwined as they fell asleep not knowing when they'd be back in the same bed.


	2. Chapter 2

Jan 23rd, 2013

Hotch placed his gun in the hotel safe and laid down on the bed exhausted. They'd been in rural Oklahoma for 2 days now and there still wasn't an end in site. The case had been brutal - women were being raped and tortured before having their bodies tossed in dumpsters as if they were trash. He'd decided to send the team back to the hotel to get some rest but with the images of the women burned into their brains he wasn't convinced anyone would find sleep. Hotch glanced at his phone - it was 11:15 but that meant it was only 10:15 in New York. It was a weeknight but it was possible Beth was still awake.

"You up?" He sent her a quick message - knowing that if she was in bed that her phone would be on 'do not disturb' an it wouldn't wake her.

"Sure am. Netflix is getting the best of me tonight. What's up?"

Hotch called her and she picked up almost immediately.

"Aaron are you alright?" Beth asked him, worry evident in her voice.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just stuck in Oklahoma and wanted to hear your voice before I went to bed."

"Has it been a hard case?" she asked him softly.

"Yeah," it was the only answer he offered. Beth didn't push him for more details. "How was your day?" He asked her hoping she could distract him.

It worked. She went on about art and clients and phone calls and things she wouldn't normally bother to go into so much detail about but she knew the content of the conversation didn't matter. He just wanted to relax, to hear something familiar, to know that she was safe and at home. He could feel his body releasing the tension it had been carrying and relaxing into the bed - he wished he had the forethought to change into his pajamas before calling her so he wouldn't have to get back out of bed once he hung up.

Beth came to an end clearly running out of minute details of her day to tell him. "I miss you. And Jack," she told him.

"We miss you too. He always talks about you, asks when we'll see you next."

"Well I have events all weekend but next weekend I'm fairly open. I could take the early morning Saturday train and then head home Sunday night. Are you and Jack free?"

"Well you know how my schedule goes but yes, barring any national emergencies we'll be around. I feel bad you're always coming to us though. You spend half your weekends on the train."

"Trust me, it's worth it. I'll wait to buy the tickets that way if something comes up with work you can let me know. But I really hope nothing comes up because I really, really miss you."

"I miss you too. I love you, I'll talk to you tomorrow?"

"Sounds good. I love you too, Aaron. Bye"

"Bye." Hotch hung up the phone and felt much more at ease than he did 10 minutes before. He forced himself out of bed to brush his teeth and change into pajamas before climbing back into bed to get what little sleep he could.

Feb 2nd, 2013

"Do you see her Daddy?" Jack asked excitedly.

"Not yet, bud. We're a little early. Her train doesn't get in for a few more minutes"

Hotch smiled down as his son. He was holding his hand in the crowded train station and they were both eagerly awaiting Beth's arrival.

"There she is dad! There she is!" Jack jumped up and down and pointed in the general direction of the train platforms.

Aaron scanned his eyes and found her. She looked off. Paler than usual but still, when she saw them, she gave them a huge smile. Jack released his grip on his dad's hand and ran toward Beth yelling her name.

"Hey Jack! It's so good to see you!" Beth exclaimed as she crouched down and gave Jack a big hug. She stood back up and reached out to hug Hotch as well. "It's good to see you too!" she said to Hotch in his ear as he hugged her. He pulled back to get a better look at her.

"Are you okay?" As happy as he was to see her he could tell she wasn't feeling the best.

"Totally fine. Just a little nauseous from the train. That's the last time I sit in a backward facing seat."

Hotch gave her a worried look but she brushed him off and quickly kissed his lips. She grabbed his hand and Jacks hand as they walked towards the exit, Aaron carrying her weekend bag.

"So!" She said excitedly "What's the plan for the day?"

"Well Jack has a new found love for the board game Clue, so I think a few games of that are on the itinerary. And if Jack gets all his homework done today he would like the three of us to go see a movie tomorrow before you catch your train back." Hotch ignored the feeling he got when he mentioned her leaving tomorrow when she had only been here a few minutes.

"That sounds perfect!"

"Yay!" Jack exclaimed.

Hotch smiled at the two of them. He wasn't sure who loved Beth more; him or his son.

They piled into the car and headed towards home. Shortly into the drive Hotch noticed Beth wasn't feeling well again. Jack was chatting to her from the back seat and she was barely responding which wasn't like her. He could see her taking deep breaths in through her nose and out through her mouth. She interrupted his train of thought before he could ask if she was okay.

"Can you pull over I think I'm going to be sick"

Hotch immediately pulled into a gas station on his right and she jumped out of the car before he was even in park. He watched helplessly as she puked into the gas station trash can over and over again. He turned back to Jack who looked rightfully worried and told him to stay in the car.

By the time he got to Beth she was standing back up straight and wiping her mouth.

"Sorry about that" she looked at him embarrassed.

"Go sit in the car with Jack, I'll be back."

Beth got back into the car and caught her breath while Hotch headed into the convenience store. He came out only a couple minutes later and hopped into the driver's seat.

"Here take these, they'll help you feel better." He handed her pepto-bismol and dramamine and pulled out ginger ale and gatorade from the bag. She smiled softly at him.

"If I take the dramamine it'll knock me out for the rest of the day. I won't be conscious enough to play Clue with Jack."

"It'll be worth it if it means you don't puke the entire way back home. Besides he can work on his homework while you nap. You probably need the rest."

Beth was annoyed that her random bout of motion sickness was ruining their time together but she appreciated his thoughtfulness nonetheless. She took the medicine and washed it down with light blue gatorade.

"Thank you," she said.

"You're welcome. Just let me know if we need to stop again.

"Are you sick, Beth?" Jack piped up from the back seat.

"I don't think so bud, I think the train just made my head spin a little bit. I'll be just fine."

Jack seemed satisfied with that answer but Hotch not so much. He continued to give her worried looks throughout the rest of the drive.

Finally they made it back to Hotch's apartment and Beth was feeling the effects of the Dramamine. She could hardly keep her eyes open.

"Go lay down. I'll check on you in a bit"

Beth didn't argue. She quickly settled in to his comfy bed and snuggled into the blankets. They were clean and crisp, clearly he had washed them prior to her arrival. It didn't take long before she succumbed to the drug induced slumber.

Beth slowly opened her eyes. All feelings of nausea were gone and replaced with an intense sense of hunger. She glanced at her phone. Nearly 4 PM. Had she really napped for that long? She was sad she had missed a whole afternoon with them but glad she was feeling better. Beth walked out of the bedroom and found both of her boys on the couch; Aaron reading Chamber of Secrets aloud to Jack. She smiled and joined them on the couch.

"Beth! You're awake! Do you want to play Clue? I want to play Clue but dad says you can't play with two players and we needed to wait for you to ask you if you'd play with us so will you play Clue with us Beth?!"

Beth grinned at the boys excitement.

"I'd love to play Clue with you Jack! As long as I get to be Mrs. Peacock. She's my favorite. First I may need a snack though. All that sleeping made me hungry!"

"Jack and I had grilled cheese and tomato soup for lunch? Want me to whip you up one while you guys set up the game?"

"That sounds wonderful, thank you." She pecked him on the lips as he helped her off the couch.

The afternoon passed in a haze of board games, laughter, and snacks. Before she knew it, the three of them were on the couch watching a movie before bed. Jack sprawled out on his belly, his head resting on Beth's thigh and she leaned into Aaron. He mindlessly stroked her hair and she couldn't remember the last time she had felt so relaxed. The final credits of Wall-E played on the screen and Jack lifted his head.

"Do you really think that could happen Dad? Could we really have so much trash that we have to move to a whole new planet?"

"I don't know, Bud. I think it's possible if we're not careful. But there are a lot of things we can do to prevent it - like recycle, buy fruits and veggies, take shorter showers. We can talk more about it tomorrow. Right now, what I do know is it's time for you to go to bed. Go put PJ's on and brush your teeth, Beth and I will come say goodnight to you in a couple of minutes."

"But dad, I'm not even tired." Jack whined.

"I already let you stay up past your bedtime because it's a weekend and Beth is here. But now it is time for you to get some rest. I don't want to argue with you."

Beth watched on. Impressed that Aaron balanced the no nonsense parenting with being a nurturing and supportive caregiver so well.

"You're an amazing dad, you know that?"

"Shipping my kid off to bed so I can have alone time with my girlfriend is being an amazing dad?" Aaron joked.

Beth chuckled. "Well as much as I love Jack I'm not going to pretend I don't love our alone time. But you know that's not what I mean. Jack is a well adjusted happy kid - and that's because of you, Aaron. He idolizes you and you've never given him a reason not to. You're his hero."

Aaron let a moment of vulnerability cross his face. "I'm his hero now. But superhero's fail Beth. I don't know what I'm going to do when he stops understanding why I'm gone all the time, when he starts truly wondering why his mother died…"

Beth wrapped her arms around him clutching the back of his t-shirt in her palms. "All he needs is you, Aaron. Just keep doing what you're doing. Be present when you can but let go of the guilt when you can't. Your commitment to helping people is shaping him into the wonderful man he is going to become. And I know when the difficult questions come you'll be ready with the best possible answers."

Aaron just held on to her. Letting her comfort him. Allowing himself a rare moment of vulnerability with her - he knew it wouldn't scare her off.

"Let's go say goodnight to that sweet boy," Beth whispered in his ear.

He nodded and they headed into Jack's room to kiss him goodnight finding him already sound asleep underneath the covers.

"Why don't conserve some water and shower together?" Aaron asked suggestively as he gently closed Jack's door behind them.

"Mm I'll get the water going," Beth grinned.


	3. Chapter 3

Feb 15, 2013

"Hey! Are you in the city?" Aaron had called Beth as he got off the train at Penn Station.

"Just getting off the train now, going to catch the subway to your neighborhood. You home yet?"

"Running a little late at work but I'm finishing up. Let's meet at my place, I should get there around the same time as you."

Sure enough, Hotch let himself into Beth's apartment and not even 5 minutes later Beth came in the front door. Looking a bit frazzled but very happy.

"I'm so glad you're here!" Beth dropped her work bag onto a dining chair and gave him a huge hug. She leaned back and found his lips with hers. It felt good to just be the two of them. A whole weekend of not needing to be chaste for poor Jack's sake.

"I'm glad to be here," Aaron smiled back at her before giving her another kiss. Beth's stomach grumbled breaking off their kiss as Aaron chuckled.

"Did you eat lunch today?" he asked her trying to sound playful but his worry broke through.

"It was a tad hectic at work today. Besides, I made us dinner reservations at one of my favorite restaurants so I wanted to be hungry! We should get going though. It's about a mile walk."

Hotch began to put on his coat and asked her "is the subway still making you sick?"

"Meh, on and off. It's getting better. Mostly I just want an excuse to hold hands with you." Beth smiled at him.

They walked hand in hand, mostly in silence. Hotch didn't mind but it was unlike Beth to be so quiet after having spent the last few couple weeks apart.

"Is something bothering you?" Hotch asked her gently.

"I'm trying to work up the courage to tell you something."

Hotch was worried. She hadn't been this nervous to tell him about the job in NYC and that had significantly affected their relationship. Was she going to break up with him? Would she do that when he had just gotten there for a whole weekend?

"Okay…" He probed hesitantly. Not sure he wanted to hear what was about to come out of her mouth.

"So I had an appointment on Wednesday to get my IUD replaced. They're good for 5 years and I was coming up on that and I was trying to be proactive even though it's a miserable process getting them changed."

Beth took a deep breath and kept going.

"They always make you pee before your appointment and I didn't think anything of it. But when the midwife came in to start the procedure she told me something."

"What?" Aaron asked. Growing more and more concerned for the health of his girlfriend.

Beth stopped walking and turned to look at him.

"Aaron, I'm pregnant."

Aaron stood in stunned silence. Before re-taking her hand and resuming their walk towards the restaurant.

"Are you sure?" He asked. Still audibly shocked.

"Yeah." Beth answered him, clearly still in shock herself. "They did an ultrasound to see how far along I was since I didn't know when it would have happened. I'm already 9 weeks along. It must have been New Years Eve."

"Wow." He replied. Processing all the information.

"I'm so sorry Aaron. I didn't realize the IUD wasn't working anymore and I've never had a problem with them in the past!"

"Hey!" This is not your fault!" Aaron told her adamantly. "We're both adults. We both decided to rely on your IUD as our only method of protection. This isn't just on you."

Beth leaned into him as they walked. Teary eyed but feeling a giant weight lifted off of her. One that she had been carrying for two days now.

"We're here." She stopped and gestured with her head towards the restaurant.

They waited until they had been seated and ordered before resuming the conversation.

"Tell me what you're thinking," Beth asked him.

"I'm thinking it doesn't matter what I'm thinking. It only matters what you're thinking. I'm with you. One hundred percent no matter what. So tell me what you're thinking."

"I'm thinking that I'm terrified. We've never talked about this. And I was fine with the fact that I was never going to have my own biological children. But now I know about this baby. This baby that's been growing inside of me for 9 weeks and I'm excited. Excited about the possibility of us having a child together and giving Jack a sibling and being a real family."

"Being a dad is simultaneously the hardest and best thing I've ever done. There's never a perfect time to have a child. It just comes and you make do. And it's the most rewarding thing. I'm not going to pretend that I'm not terrified too. But Jack is the best thing to ever happen to me, and I know this baby will be too."

"So we're really going to do this? Beth looked at him starting to smile.

"We're gonna do this." Hotch confirmed smiling back at her.

"We're going to have a baby!"

Beth started laughing with joy and Aaron got up from his seat to pull her into his embrace. Fully allowing themselves to both feel the excitement that they had initially repressed.

"We should probably sit down," Beth laughed as they continued to hold each other standing next to their table. "People are looking at us like we're crazy."

"I don't even care." Hotch said but released her anyway.

They sat down still grinning like fools. Beth asked him to tell her stories about Jack when he was a baby. She ate her food and listened to him recount memories of sleepless nights, first steps, first words. She wondered if their baby's first word would be "mama" or "dada" like Jack's was. If their baby would be a good sleeper or a good eater. If their baby would get his brown eyes or her blue ones. She couldn't stop thinking about their baby. Their baby. Would she get used to saying "their baby" over the course of the next 31 weeks? Because right now everytime she thought the words in her head she immediately got butterflies.

Beth rolled from her back to her side and placed her hand on Aaron's bare chest, playing with the dark hairs there. After dinner they had gone back to her place and had been quick to jump into bed and celebrate their good news. She slowly grazed her hand up and down his torso and Hotch kept his eyes closed in contentment.

"How do you think Jack will take the news?" she asked him.

"I don't know."

"How will you tell him?"

"I don't know."

"Are you still too far gone in your sex induced haze to think of answers to my questions?" Beth chuckled.

"Hmm possibly." Hotch answered her.

Beth giggled. "I guess I'll save my breath and put my mouth to better use then."

She straddled him and leaned down to start kissing his neck. She kissed, and lightly bit, and sucked, and soothed with her tongue. She kissed across his cheek and lips towards the other cheek and down to the other side of his neck where she continued her assault. Hotch started moaning and shifting his hips upwards to grind himself into her, desperate for any friction he could find. Beth smiled into his neck before resuming sucking on his pulse point. She loved when she could make tightly wound Hotch lose control. She was used to him taking charge in the bedroom and she had absolutely no qualms about that but every once in a while she liked to remind him what she was capable of.

"Tell me what you want, baby." Beth whispered against his ear as she slid herself over his painfully hard cock.

Hotch just groaned and thrust himself upwards as a response.

Beth licked from his earlobe to the top of his ear. "Use your words, Hotchner. Tell me what you want."

"I want you to put me inside of you and keep me there forever."

Beth was impressed that he could form something so hot and sweet at the same time given his current situation. She braced herself with one hand on his chest and grabbed him with her other. Slowly she lined herself up with him and sank down on top of him, joining them together once again that night. They groaned in unison as she bottomed out on top of him. With both hands placed on his chest and his hands firmly gripping his hips Beth started to move on top of him. She started off slow; steadying herself and finding her balance, before speeding up and rocking herself up and down on top of him. Hotch was finding himself struggling to form any sort of coherent thought as the sensations of Beth on top of him combined with his incredible view of her breasts swaying right in his line of vision. His vision went dark and hazy as he came hard into his girlfriend letting out strangled gasps. Beth eased him down from his high slowing her pace and Hotch took her by surprise and flipped her onto the bed. He reached his hand down in between her thighs and stroked the sensitive bundle of nerves there. While he stroked her he found her lips with his and slowly kissed her, he could feel her starting to lose control as she neared orgasm. Hotch loved the sounds of her heavy breaths as she finally released the kiss and gave in to her body unable to do anything but clutch the hairs on the back of his head keeping his lips near hers.

Hotch gave her one last sweet kiss on the lips before rolling over to lay next to her. "Yeah, I think I'm ready for us to live in the same state again."

"Hm just the same state?"

"Same house would be nice too" Aaron turned his head to look at her and smiled.

"That does sound nice." Beth smiled back at him. "I'll give work my notice on Monday. There are a few projects I want to finish up so it'll probably be longer than 2 weeks but I want to get the process started. I want to come home to you."

"I'll start looking for houses. For the four of us."


	4. Chapter 4

March 18, 2013 - 13 weeks pregnant

"JFK Terminal 2, please" Beth hopped in the back of the cab while the driver loaded her suitcase into the trunk. Normally she was a public transport kind of gal but with everything being charged to the corporate credit card she was treating herself. Not to mention the subway had a tendency to make her nauseous, things were getting better as she settled into her second trimester but it wasn't worth risking. She pulled out her phone and decided to call her boyfriend before she was tied up at airport security. He answered on the second ring.

"Hey you."

"Hey! Do you have a minute to talk or are you busy with work."

"I can take a break for a few minutes. Reid will probably work faster without me bugging him anyway. Are you at the airport?"

"In the cab on the way there. Just wanted to check in with you before I'm a mile high in the sky. What city are you currently in?"

"Baltimore, actually. Not nearly as fun as Milan."

"Ha if I was there for anything except work I would agree with you. And I won't even be able to enjoy the wine so really, what's the point in even going?"

Aaron laughed. "Well I guess we'll have to go back to Italy together another time. And drink all the wine."

"Mm that sounds lovely. I'm going to take you up on that Hotchner."

Hotch's phone started to buzz and Emily was calling him. She was out in the field with Morgan and he needed to take the call. "Beth, I'm so sorry but I have to get back to work. Please text me when you land and be safe, okay? I love you."

"Love you too. Bye."

Hotch quickly snapped himself back into FBI mode for Emily but truth be told his mind was still with Beth. He had only seen her one other weekend since she had told them they were having a baby. She had come to DC to look at houses with him and they had even put in an offer on one. They were still in the negotiation phase but would hopefully be closing in a couple of weeks, when Beth came back to DC for good. He didn't love the idea of his pregnant girlfriend flying across the ocean without him but he knew Beth's devotion to her job ran deep and she wanted to end on a strong note. She only had one more week after coming home from Italy and then she was done. Hotch pushed the thoughts of Beth and the little baby she was incubating aside for now, with any luck they'd wrap the case up and be home by tomorrow.

March 21, 2013

Hotch was annoyed. He had fallen asleep on his office couch after coming home from Maryland and before he had even had the chance to go home and see his son they were already being summoned to a different city. He had to call in the team. Again. He knew they would be just as annoyed as he was, the only difference would be that he wasn't allowed to show it. His stomach hurt. It didn't feel like acid reflux but he took tums anyway and started calling Garcia.

He listened as his team discussed the case at the round table trying to ignore the increasing pain. His vision started to blur and darken. He could barely breathe the pain in his abdomen was becoming so extreme. He could barely hear himself utter the words "excuse me" before everything went black and he fell to the floor.

Hotch felt a dull ache in his stomach. The familiar ache of having your insides torn apart and then attempted to be pieced back together then have all the savagery masked with medications like morphine. He could hear the beeping of the monitors. He could smell the antiseptic. He didn't need to see to know he was in a hospital but he could also hear the familiar clicking of a keyboard. He turned his head toward the noise and opened his eyes to see who it was. Hotch was comforted to see Garcia sitting in the chair next to his bed working away.

"What happened?" Hotch asked. His throat scratchy.

Garcia jumped up. "Oh my god. You're awake. Oh my god oh my god oh my god. Sir, you had us all so worried."

"Penelope. What happened?"

"Your scar tissue, sir. From the stab wounds. Something with the adhesions and tearing and bleeding. What's important is that they were able to do surgery and fix it."

"Good. That's good. And Jack? Is he okay?"

"Jack's fine. He's with your sister in law. She didn't want to bring him until you were awake, sir."

"Thanks Garcia. Do you have my phone?"

"Yes sir. It's right here" Garcia handed him his phone. "We called Beth but it was almost midnight in Milan so she didn't answer. It's almost 6 AM now though so hopefully she'll be up soon and she'll get my messages."

"Don't worry about it Garcia. I'll call her. If you wouldn't mind checking in with the team and reporting back to me?"

"Of course. Of course." Garcia gathered up her computer and exited the hospital room, giving Hotch his privacy as he made the phone calls.

Hotch made the decision to call Jessica first. He didn't want to wake his pregnant sleeping girlfriend if he didn't have to.

The phone rang and Jessica answered. She was glad to hear that Hotch was awake and she happily put Jack on the phone.

"Hi Dad"

"Hey buddy, I miss you."

"I miss you too Dad. Are you okay? Aunt Jessie said you were hurt and you had to go to the hospital?

"I did buddy but they fixed me and I'm gonna be all better soon. I just have to stay in the hospital for a couple of days but you can come visit me. And then we can go home together. Does that sound okay, Jack."

"Yeah that okay, Dad"

Hotch heard a knock and looked up. Penelope was standing in the doorway holding her phone. She mouthed "Beth" to him and he nodded.

"Hey buddy, I have to go. I just wanted to call and let you know that I'm okay, and that I love and miss you. But you'll come visit me tonight."

"Love you too. Bye dad.

"Bye bud."

Hotch ended the call and reached out for Garcia's phone. She once again stepped out of the room so he could have his privacy.

"Hey" he said cautiously into the phone.

"Aaron, what happened?! I woke up to a million texts and calls from Penelope and David saying that you collapsed. That you had to be rushed into surgery. Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, babe, I promise. There was a complication from the stab wounds, I still have to talk to the doctor to get the whole picture but the surgery went well and I'm going to be okay. I'm sorry that I worried you."

"You had to be rushed into emergency surgery and you're apologizing to me?!" Beth let out an exasperated laugh. "I need to come home. I'll call my boss and let her know I need to cut the trip short and I'm coming back to DC."

"Beth, you don't need to do that. I'm fine. Finish what you're there for and I'll see you when you move home in a week and a half."

"Bullshit Aaron. There is no way I'm letting you lie in a hospital bed while I'm halfway across the world. I'm catching the first flight out of here and I'll finish what I can remotely. But then I'm done. I'm only going back to NYC to pack up my stuff and I'll worry about that once you're back on your feet.

Hotch didn't argue with her. Secretly he was really happy he was seeing her sooner than planned but he wished it wasn't under these circumstances. "Okay just please be safe. I'm not going anywhere. Text me your flight plans and I'll be eagerly awaiting your arrival."

"I love you too much for these shenanigans, Aaron Hotchner. No more scares. I almost had a heart attack waking up to those messages."

"Please no heart attacks. I'm fine. I promise. How are you?" Beth knew what he meant. He wanted to know about the baby but they still hadn't told the team so in case Garcia was in ear shot he wanted to be subtle.

"We're good. No nausea attacks this trip. Second trimester is feeling goooood, Hotchner. Poor time for you to be on the mend, my libido has skyrocketed since the nausea went away."

"Well I don't plan on being incapacitated forever my love."

"Mm good news for the both of us then."

"Beth, the doctor is walking in, I'll talk to you later? Keep me updated on your flights."

"I will. I love you."

"Love you too."

Hotch talked with the doctors. Things went well and his prognosis was promising. Lay low for a couple of weeks and then he can resume life as normal. Jack came to visit and they read Harry Potter and ordered ice cream from the cafeteria. His nurses made sure his pain was well controlled and that he was getting up and walking enough. Overall the day went by fast despite missing Beth and by the time Jack left he was exhausted. His phone buzzed and he read the text from Beth.

*Just landed in London. Flying back into DC from here and should be with you by 9 AM. Love you, get some rest."

*Planning on going to bed now. See you in the morning. Love you both.*

Hotch laid the phone on the bedside table and turned off the light above his bed. His abdomen still provided him with sharp shooting pain anytime he moved the wrong way but eventually exhaustion won out and he drifted to sleep.

It was a restless night. Hospitals weren't exactly quiet. Or dark. And the pain in his abdomen waxed and waned but he was able to get spots of sleep here and there. Shortly after 7 AM he got the text he had been waiting for.

*Plane just landed in DC. As soon as I can get my bag and a taxi I'm headed your way Hotchner.*

*Can't wait. I'll put on my best gown for the occasion.*

*I'm a lucky girl*

Hotch's phone started ringing and it was Jessie.

"Jessica, hi."

"Hey Aaron, sorry to bother you. Jack's just having a hard time with the idea of going to school today. I think seeing you in the hospital shook him up more than he let on. Any chance you have time to talk to him?"

"Of course, put him on."

"Hi, Daddy."

"Hey buddy. Are you getting ready for school?"

"I don't want to go to school, Dad. I want to come visit you in the hospital."

Hotch could hear his boy getting emotional. He knew he was trying not to cry. Hotch felt conflicted about what to do.

"You know what though, Jack. Today is Friday. So you only have to make it through today and then we can spend all weekend together. And Beth will be here too. So even if I have to spend the night in the hospital again you can go home with Beth and sleep in your room."

"I miss you Dad and I'm scared that you're going to go away to heaven like mom."

Hotch could feel his heart break and his son said those words.

"I promise that's not what's going to happen, buddy. Tell you what, you can miss school just for today. You can hang out with me and Beth at the hospital but it might be kind of boring."

"That's okay, dad. I don't mind being bored."

"Okay bud, can you put Aunt Jessie back on the phone?"

"Hey, so what's the plan?"

"I'm sorry Jessie, would you mind bringing him here and staying until Beth arrives? She shouldn't be too long, Jack isn't allowed to stay without another adult present."

"Of course, it's no problem Aaron."

Twenty minutes later Jack and Jessie knocked and came into his room. Jack ran up to his dad and Aaron pulled him up onto the bed with him, mindful of his IV and incisions. Jessie set Jack's bag down on the chair.

"I packed his book and some other things for him to do in there in case he gets bored. There's also snacks and his water bottle."

"Thanks so much, Jessica."

"Can we watch cartoons, Dad?"

"Of course, bud." Hotch turned on the hospital TV and found Spongebob for Jack. Jack settled in next to his father and Hotch closed his eyes and enjoyed being close to his son.

He must have dozed off because the next thing he heard was his son exclaiming "Beth!". Hotch opened his eyes and found his girlfriend in the doorway of his hospital room luggage in tow.

"Jack!" Beth put her stuff down and came to them. She hugged them both at once, careful to not touch anything important. "It's so good to see you guys." She kissed Jack's cheek and then looked up and kissed Aaron on the lips.

"Dad let me miss school today so I could see him and we're watching spongebob!"

"I see that! That sounds like a perfect Friday."

"Jack why don't we run down to the cafeteria and grab a coffee for Beth?"

Jack nodded and hopped out of his father's hospital bed. Beth glanced at Jessie and smiled in appreciation. Jessie had always been very kind to Beth but she'd be lying if she said she wasn't nervous about telling her about the pregnancy. They hadn't told anyone yet, not even Jack.

Jack and Jessie closed the door behind them and Beth sat on the bed facing Hotch.

"You had me worried, Hotchner"

"I know, I'm sorry."

Aaron reached out a hand and cupped her face. "C'mere"

Beth leaned in and they shared a longer kiss. He placed his forehead against hers "Thank you for coming back."

"Staying was never even an option I considered."

"I love you." Hotch placed a hand over her belly. "Both of you."

Beth giggled. "Sorry inform you but baby is pretty much still way down here". She moved his hand down towards her pelvis."

"Fair enough" Hotch laughed.

"We need to tell people soon. I like being in our bubble but if we keep being sneaky about it we're just going to get caught. I'd rather we tell people on our own terms."

"I agree. I want us to tell Jack first, but we'll need to tell everyone else soon after because if there's one thing 7 year olds suck at it's keeping secrets."

"When you get to come home? We can tell him about the baby. And about the house. It's gonna be a lot of change for a little kid, Aaron."

"Unfortunately he's handled worse. He'll be okay. He really loves you Beth, he'll be excited that you're going to be around even when I'm not. As far as the baby goes, we'll just have to see how it goes but I can't imagine him being a bad big brother."

"No, definitely not a bad big brother. How do you plan on telling the team?"

"One hurdle at a time, please" Aaron blushed.

Beth giggled. "You act like you're some teenage boy who is terrified to tell his parents that he got the neighbor girl pregnant. We're adults, Aaron. I'm sure they were well aware that we have sex."

"I prefer to assume that they don't think about my sex life at all."

"You're not ashamed are you? I know this wasn't planned but are you embarrassed? That at 42 years old you're knocking up your girlfriend?"

Beth's tone was light but he could sense her worry and could sense her feelings starting to get hurt. She wasn't usually very sensitive but he figured hormones, worry, and sleep deprivation were probably getting the better of her today.

"I'm absolutely not embarrassed. I am very excited about our baby. I'm just not used to making announcements to the team that are personal in nature but I would love if you could be there when we tell them."

Beth nodded and hugged him, feeling a bit teary.

"We got you coffee Beth!" Jack and Jessie walked back into the room. Beth released Hotch and wiped her eyes.

"Thank you so much, Jack! Here let me move so you can sit back up with your dad." Beth got off the bed and picked Jack up to set him next to his dad.

"I'm going to head out. Call me if you need anything, Aaron."

They all said their goodbyes to Aunt Jessie. Hotch relished this time with just his son and his girlfriend. He found it hard to believe that soon this would be the norm, always coming home to them. The day passed as blissfully as it could in a hospital room. Jack watched cartoons and colored pictures. Beth worked from her laptop and read to Jack occasionally giving Hotch little smiles. He was disappointed when the doctor came in and let him know he would be staying another night but would most likely be able to go home in the morning. Soon it was early evening and Beth was getting ready to take Jack home to feed him dinner and put him to bed, it was her first night alone with Jack.

"There's plenty of food in the fridge and the pantry. He can have whatever just don't let him sucker you into ice cream before bed because then he can't fall asleep. Bedtime is at 8 but it's okay if it's closer to 9 since it's a weekend. He's watched enough TV today but if he wants to read in bed that's okay. Am I forgetting to tell you anything? Do you have any questions?"

"Relax Hotchner. I've spent nights with him, granted you always did most of the work but I know his routine. We'll be fine. You just worry about getting enough rest so we can take you home in the morning."

"I'm sorry you're right. Jack you listen to whatever Beth says okay. Now come give me a hug goodnight."

"Night, dad. See you tomorrow"

"Goodnight buddy, I love you." Hotch kissed his son's head. He looked up at Beth "I love you too."

Beth leaned down to Hotch's level on the bed and kissed his forehead. "I love you. See you in the morning."

Hotch watched as Jack took Beth's hand and they left him alone in his hospital room. Hotch couldn't wait to be discharged and be able to sleep in his own bed with Beth and his son down the hall. And as much as it scared him, he also couldn't wait to start telling his friends and family that soon he would be a father of two.

Okay fully aware that Hotch's collapse on the show doesn't really line up with my timeline in this story but whatever… creative liberty and all that.


	5. Chapter 5

March 23rd, 2013 - 13 weeks pregnant

"Jack, can you come here for a minute?"

Jack ran into the living room hearing his father's call. They had brought Hotch home from the hospital that morning. Hotch was sitting on the couch with Beth next to him.

"Hey buddy, we wanted to talk to you about something."

"Did I do something wrong?" Jack looked worried.

"No not at all buddy, we actually have good news for you." Hotch looked at Beth before continuing. "Well buddy, here's the thing. Beth and I… we're going to have a baby."

"A baby?" Jack now just looked confused.

"Yeah bud. Beth is pregnant with your baby brother or sister. You're going to be a big brother! What do you think?"

"Beth doesn't look like she's pregnant," Jack still confused.

"Well Jack that's because the baby is still really small," Beth told him. "But as the baby gets bigger so will my belly. And then I'll look pregnant and we'll be able to feel and see the baby move in my belly until it's ready to come out."

"How long until the baby is ready to come out?"

"A while Jack. The baby won't come until after summer is done," his father answered him.

"When I'm 8 and in 3rd grade? That's when the baby will come?"

"That's right. So how do you feel about this? About being a big brother?" His father asked him again.

"I think it will be really cool! Babies are pretty fun and I'll be able to teach the baby how to build legos and read books and all sorts of cool things!"

Beth laughed "Well you might have to wait until the baby is a little order before he or she is ready for legos but I think this baby is going to be so lucky to have you as a big brother."

"Can I go back to my room and play now, Dad?"

"Soon buddy, there's one other thing we wanted to talk to you about." Jack just looked at his dad while he waited for him to continue. "Well buddy our home is the perfect size for you and me but with the baby coming Beth is going to move back to DC from New York and she's going to live with us."

"She is!" Jack yelled excitedly"

"She is!" Hotch smiled at his son. "And when the baby comes they'll be living here too. So we are going to find a bigger house for all four of us to live in."

Jack's face fell a bit. "But I like living here."

"I know you do, buddy. But I promise you'll like the new house too. We're going to stay close, you won't have to change schools. And we'll find a house with a yard! So you can practice soccer in the backyard whenever you want, not just when we go to the park."

"I guess that would be kind of cool."

"Beth and I found a house we really think you're going to like Jack. Do you want to go see it with us once I'm feeling a little bit better?"

"Yeah!" Hotch was glad his son was excited but the truth was they really couldn't back out even if Jack didn't like the house. The owners had accepted their offer and they were closing on the house. Soon he and Beth would be homeowners. Together. "You can go back to your room and play now if you want."

Jack ran up to his dad and gave him a hug. Then he gave Beth a hug. "I'm really really happy I get to be a big brother," he told her.

"I'm really really happy too Jack," Beth held on tight to the little boy and kissed the top of his head.

Jack ran off back to his room to play and Beth gently leaned into Hotch's side. She kissed his temple. There were many more people to tell about the pregnancy, but at the end of the day his opinion was the only one that mattered and he was happy so she was happy too.

March 30th, 2013 - 14 weeks pregnant

"You're sure you feel up to going out tonight?" Beth asked him from the bathroom. She was finishing applying her makeup. They were supposed to go out and meet the rest of the team for drinks. Hotch joined her in the bathroom and watched her as she finished getting ready.

"Beth, I feel fine. I promise you." Slowly but surely over the course of the past week Hotch had been on his feet more and more.

"Well you let me know when you want to leave, okay? I don't want you to push yourself too hard and set your recovery back."

Hotch kissed her cheek. "I appreciate you worrying about me, you ready?"

Beth nodded and Hotch called to Jack letting him know it was time to go. They piled in the car and drove to Jessica's house to drop off Jack for the night. They had told Jessica the news when she had dropped off food for them after Hotch had come home from the hospital. She had taken it really well and had only expressed sadness that with Hotch and Beth living together she wouldn't be able to spend as much time with Jack. They were relieved and had promised her that they still wanted her to be a big part of Jack's life.

"A night out will be fun," Beth glanced over at him from the driver's seat. It was a rare time that Hotch had let her drive, he wasn't taking narcotics for pain anymore but she was DD'ing and he had given up some of his usual control this past week. Hotch had spent most of the week on the couch at Beth's insistence while she had started packing up his apartment. Hotch was set to go back to work on the 7th of April and move in day for their new house was the 12th. There was still a lot of packing to be done, Beth still had to go back to NYC to pack up her apartment in Manhattan, but for tonight they were going to enjoy being out with the members of his team.

Beth pulled into the parking lot of the brewery and they hopped out of the car. Hotch took Beth's hand and they walked in together. They were the last to arrive and the team excitedly waved them over to the table.

"Good to see you back on your feet, man!" Derek exclaimed, giving Hotch a handshake. Garcia gave a hug and reminded him of how worried she'd been. Rossi have him a pat on the back, Spencer nodded at him signifying he was happy to see him. Beth got hugs from nearly everyone and settled in at the table in between Hotch and Emily.

"First round is on me!" Rossi told the table and everyone cheered. Hotch ordered a stout and Beth stuck with water. The table got their drinks and Hotch announced "I want to make a toast."

Everyone raised their glasses and looked at their unit chief. "I want to thank everyone for their grace during this past week and the week going forward as I take time off from work to heal. The texts of encouragement, the meals brought to us, everything was so appreciated. Beth, Jack, and I truly thank you guys. I am so grateful that Jack and our new baby will grow up with you all in their lives. So cheers!"

Hotch watched the realization dawn on all of their faces as they processed the information that he told them. Spencer was the first to speak up.

"You and Beth are having a baby?" He asked looking happy for them.

Beth smiled and answered "we are!"

The table erupted with cheers. Clearly the team was very happy for their boss. Hugs and congratulations were given to the couple.

"How far along are you?" JJ asked her.

"A few days past 15 weeks."

"Ah good you survived your first trimester! Well I have tons of maternity clothes and pregnancy books that you're more than welcome to borrow if you would like."

"Thank you so much!" Beth smiled at her grateful for their support.

The night passed with ease and laughter. Spencer informed them of what was going on during the 15th week of pregnancy and Beth was amazed at how much her baby was already formed. The team offered to help them unpack their new house which they graciously accepted. Derek and Garcia continued their flirtatious banter. Beth asked JJ questions about her pregnancy and what recommendations she had. Emily asked her about her employment plans now that she was back in DC. Beth was happy to report that her old job had jumped at the chance to offer her a promotion when they heard she was going to be moving back. Overall the night went quickly and Beth was glad they had come. She smiled as she watched Hotch laugh and talk with the team. He had ordered several beers at this point in the night and Beth could tell he was starting to get quite the buzz based on his flushed face and his arms gesticulating wildly as he conversed. Beth felt fortunate that she got to see relaxed Hotch more than the average person but even this was new territory for him.

"Well we should probably go," JJ said as she and Will stood up. "We told the sitter we'd be home before midnight and we're cutting it a bit close."

Beth looked at her watch and saw it was already past 11:45. The night really had flown and she was tired. Aaron put his arm around her shoulders and asked "You ready to go, babe?"

Beth smiled, he so rarely used terms of endearment. "Sure," they stood up and Aaron helped her put on her coat. They said goodbye to the team and walked out to their car.

"How are you feeling?" Beth asked Hotch as she drove home.

"I probably had one too many beers but I'll sleep it off and be fine."

Beth laughed "I meant your stitches, weirdo."

"Ahh they're sore from laughing but I think the extra beer is helping mask the discomfort," Hotch laughed back. "I'll take some motrin and tylenol when we get home."

"That sounds like a good plan."

Hotch reached his arm out and placed it at the nape of her neck, rubbing his fingers in her hairline. "I love you," he said to her.

Beth smiled and took his hand from the back of her neck and brought it to her lips. "I love you too, but you need to keep your hands to yourself when I'm driving. I'm much more easily distracted than you."

"Noted."

At home Beth went to the bathroom to start getting ready for bed. It was midnight and she was exhausted. She was drying her face with a towel when she felt Hotch behind her, his arms wrapping around her waist. He buried his face into the space between her shoulder and her neck and left kisses there.

Beth moaned and Hotch took that as encouragement to keep going. He slipped his hands under her sweater and ran them up to her breasts and palmed them through her bra. He grinded himself into her round ass and then he was the one moaning.

"Aaron. It's after midnight and I'm exhausted. And you're only a week post-op from major abdominal surgery. You're not cleared for anything until you go back to the doctor."

"Don't worry, baby. What I'm planning doesn't require any exertion from either of us." As Hotch talked he unzipped and removed her jeans and pulled the sweater over her head. "Go put one of my shirts on to sleep in and I'll meet you in bed."

Beth looked at him suspiciously but ultimately did what he said. He joined her in the bed and restarted kissing her neck. He didn't stay there long before he started moving down her chest. He pulled his shirt up so he could kiss the bare skin of her belly. At 14 weeks there was barely a bump, sometimes not even noticeable, but tonight under his lips he could feel the stretched skin. He continued his path down and settled in between her thighs. He put both of his hands on the insides of her thighs above the knees to push her legs out, butterflying them and giving him easy access. After a few exploratory licks Hotch settled on her clit. Sucking it between his lips and rubbing it with his tongue.

"Oh my god Aaron," Beth started to groan loudly.

Hotch knew that she wouldn't last long if he didn't ease up but he didn't want her to last. He wanted her to come hard and fast and then he wanted them to fall asleep in each others arms.

"Aaron, oh god, Aaron don't stop." Beth started to try and shift her hips but Hotch held her steady under him. He continued his assault on her clit and added two fingers inside of her flexing them against her g-spot. Beth nearly screamed. He felt her contract around his fingers and he slowly stopped what he was doing giving her time to ride out the orgasm.

"You're amazing," Beth said breathlessly and Aaron rejoined her at the head of the bed. He kissed her deeply. It turned him on to think about Beth tasting herself on his lips. "Go to sleep."

Beth didn't argue with him. She settled in against his side and rested her arm across his chest, careful to avoid the healing incisions below, and in minutes sleep got the better of her.

Hotch admired the sleeping woman beside him and then drifted off to sleep himself.


	6. Chapter 6

April 7, 2013 - 15 weeks pregnant

Hotch climbed into bed next to Beth and rolled onto his side facing her. He placed his hand lightly over her lower abdomen. The babe was growing bigger with every day and while still concealed under most clothing there was definitely a noticeable round of her belly under his fingers.

"Can you believe at midnight I'll be 16 weeks pregnant? I know we haven't even known for half of that time but still. It feels like this pregnancy is flying. We haven't done anything to prepare!"

"We bought an entire house!" Hotch laughed at her. "There is plenty of time and I promise once we get settled into the new house we will start checking things off the list, okay?"

Beth rolled from her back to her side so she was facing him and his hand moved from her belly to her lower back, holding her close to him.

"I'm nervous for you to go back to work," Beth looked him in the eye and stroked his face. She hesitated in bringing it up. She knew the downfall in his marriage to Haley was rooted in his love for his job and she didn't want him to feel like he was experiencing deja vu.

Hotch leaned in and captured her lips in a sweet kiss. He held her there for a moment before releasing her. "What can I do to make you feel better?"

"Honestly probably nothing. Just keep doing all the things you did before; call or message me when you can. And Aaron, listen to your gut. It's almost never wrong."

Hotch tried to give her a reassuring smile before pulling her face to his again and giving her a longer kiss. He let one hand trail leisurely down her side and back up her back as he explored her mouth. He sucked her bottom lip into his mouth and gently bit down before soothing her lip with his tongue. He felt her move her hand in between them and soon she was rubbing him through his thin boxer shorts. He was instantly hard - it had been a long two weeks. Other than him pleasuring her after their night out Beth had been insistent that Hotch wait until he was cleared for physical activity before resuming their sex life. His appointment had been Friday but any chance for intimacy had been dashed when Jack came home from school sick. Instead of spending his weekend with Beth naked and wrapped in his arms he had spent it urging Jack to drink gatorade and emptying the puke bucket that sat on the floor next to the couch. It had been a pretty miserable weekend for all involved but luckily Jack had seemed back to normal pretty much all of Sunday and neither Hotch or Beth had caught the sickness.

"Tonight though I intend to incentivize you to come home to me whenever you can, Hotchner."

"Do your worst, Miss. Clemmons."

In reality Beth had absolutely no intention of 'doing her worst' because she knew that being cleared for field work definitely did not equal her riding him like there was no tomorrow but she didn't feel the need to mention that. Beth slid her hand into his boxers and stroked him a few times before pulling him out of his underwear and free from confinement.

"Sit up, Hotchner."

Hotch scooched himself up and propped himself up on the headboard. Beth settled in between his legs and licked him from base to tip. She took the tip of him into her mouth and lightly sucked running her tongue back and forth over it. Wrapping her hand around the base of his cock she stroked him while continuing to suck him. Hotch started moaning and it was music to Beth's ears. She moved her hand and took him all the way into her mouth and toyed with his balls in the process. Bobbing her head up and down Hotch's moaning got louder.

"Beth. I... I'm getting close," Hotch struggled to get the words out.

She didn't ease up. She wanted him to come in her mouth. Beth focused her attention on the head of his dick and resumed stroking him furiously. Hotch groaned and ran his hands through her hair subtly trying to tell her to stay put, but too much of a gentleman to hold her there. Beth felt his balls tighten under her fingers and immediately after she felt the warmth hit the back of her throat. She slowed her strokes but kept him in her mouth as he rode out his orgasm.

"God, you're amazing," Hotch breathed to her as she finally eased herself off his softening dick. Beth just looked at him and smiled before pulling herself up to sit on his lap and latching her lips back on his. When Hotch broke this kiss for air Beth moved her lips to his neck and kissed and sucked her way across both sides. She was feeling insatiable.

"Are you excited to start back up at work tomorrow?" He asked her, still trying to catch his breath.

"Yeah, I am. More excited about you right now, though." Beth was starting back up at her old company in D.C. but in a promoted position. Even better was that she was going back part time so she could focus on settling them into their house and then spend more time with the baby when they made their arrival.

"Give me a second," Hotch laughed at her. "If you wanted to get off this badly you shouldn't have finished me off first."

Beth gave him a fake annoyed look that he knew meant she was acknowledging him being right. She continued to grind her hips against him in search of relief. "I know but I like it when you finish in my mouth, it turns me on even more."

Her sultry tone combined with the friction and warmth of her grinding herself on him was taking effect and he could feel himself starting to harden again. He definitely wasn't in his twenties anymore but Beth had a way of making his body forget its age.

"See, Hotchner! I knew you had it in you." Beth jokingly made fun of him.

Hotch didn't respond; only lifted her hips and shifted so that when she came back down she entered him hard. Beth groaned loudly. He put his lips on her neck.

"Want to keep talking?" He asked her, his lips moving against her soft skin.

Beth shook her head no and started to move. She grinded her hips back and forth causing delicious friction between the two of them. Hotch kept his lips on her neck switching between nibbling and sucking on her skin. Beth reached in between them and started rubbing her clit in addition to moving her hips. Her moaning got louder and it wasn't long before she was spasming around him. The sight of Beth pleasuring herself while naked and on top of him was too much to handle and Hotch orgasmed for the second time that night.

Hotch stroked her back as Beth caught her breath. Beth rested her head on his shoulder and snuggled into him. "I love you."

"I love you too. Let's get cleaned up and go to bed."

The alarm went off much too early for either of their likings. Aaron hopped in the shower first before helping Jack get ready for school. Beth showered second and as the mirror de-fogged she noticed the red marks all over her neck left there from the night before.

"Aaron!" She called loud enough for her to hear him from the kitchen where he was preparing breakfast for Jack.

"Everything okay?" Hotch asked her as he walked into the bedroom. She turned to face him and he knew immediately what he was upset about.

"Seriously Aaron? Are we in high school?"

He tried to look apologetic even though deep down a part of him was kind of proud that he put those marks on her. He'd admit that it was an immature adolescent part, but a part nonetheless.

"I'm sorry. I'll admit I got a little carried away, you have the effect on me."

"Flattery will get you nowhere, Aaron."

Hotch truly did feel bad, it was her first day back on the job and she already had something to contend with. "I truly am sorry. What can I do to help?"

"Just be more mindful in the future, please!"

Hotch gave her a quick peck on the lips. "I will, I promise. I have to get Jack off to school. Call me on your lunch break?"

"Yes, sir. And you'll call me if you have a case?"

"Yes, ma'am. That scarf your mom got you is pretty and will hide the marks well. You should wear that today."

Beth smiled. "I'm impressed, Hotchner."

Hotch smiled back at her and kissed her again. "Bye."

"Bye."

As Beth finished getting dressed and ready he heard Aaron shout to Jack that it was time to go and as they headed out the door Jack yelled "Byeeeeee Beth!". Beth shouted back to him and smiled. She was worried about Jack going back to school but the domestic bliss overtook the worry and she allowed herself to simply be content.

The phone call came shortly before 10 AM and she already knew what he was going to say.

"You have a case."

"Colorado. I'm so sorry."

"Don't apologize for doing your job, Aaron. Just be safe and come home to us when you can. I love you."

"I love you too."

The phone clicked and Beth sighed. She wasn't used to this. Sure she was used to limited time, but when she had lived in New York their time was just that, _their time. _They had whole uninterrupted weekends together. Now this was her new normal and she'd have to adapt. She wouldn't know what nights he'd be home for dinner and she refused to allow herself to wallow in that.

Beth finished her first day back at work, she picked Jack up from school, they made dinner, she helped him with his homework and kissed him goodnight when it was time for bed. Beth was exhausted. Her life had changed rapidly these past few months and she had barely had time to take a breath. As happy and excited as she was for all the changes she had to admit it was pretty overwhelming at times. She was becoming a mom to two children at 37 years old, after fully accepting that children weren't in the cards for her, she was becoming responsible for more than just herself. Beth took a deep breath and started cleaning the kitchen before climbing into bed herself. Hotch had sent her a text. _Things are busy over here but going as well as can be expected. Hope to be home to you and Jack tomorrow. Love you both. _Beth replied to him. _Jack and I had a good day. We both miss and love you. Be safe.*_ She pressed send before turning out the light and rolled onto Hotch's side of the bed.


	7. Chapter 7

May 6th, 2013 - 20 weeks pregnant

"Is this the part where you psychoanalyze me, Agent Hotchner? The part where you dissect my childhood and tell me how my mom sleeping around with men who beat me turned me into the monster I am today? Is that what comes next, Agent Hotchner?"

The UnSub sneered at him. Clearly not phased by being caught but only pleased to finally be able to rub his crimes in the faces of the masses.

"Actually no. This is the part where you rot in prison for the rest of your life. I, on the other hand, have somewhere to be."

With that Hotch and Morgan got up and a local detective came into the interrogation room to cuff and book the UnSub.

"Wheels up in 20, Team."

They wasted no time in packing up their belongings and boarding the Jet. It was a short flight from Indianapolis back to Quantico. Hotch checked his watch. He could make it… maybe.

_On the Jet now. Please wait for me. _

_Cutting it kind of close aren't ya, Hotchner? Meet me there. See you soon! _

The jet landed and for once Hotch was the first to scramble off.

"Take the rest of today and tomorrow off. Thanks for the great work, all!" Hotch shouted to them as he got in the black SUV. He sped to the office and made it with only two minutes to spare. He saw her sitting in the waiting room reading a magazine with an extremely pregnant woman on the cover.

Hotch opened the door and Beth looked up and grinned at him. She stood up ready to embrace him. "You made it!"

Hotch happily accepted her hug and kissed her cheek. "Sorry, I'm late."

"You're not late, you're right on time."

Hotch sat in the chair next to her and kept a hold of her hand. It was a Monday but due to the severe escalation of a serial killer in Indy he had been forced into spending the weekend away from his family. "Learning anything interesting?" He nodded with his head toward the magazine.

"Only the horrors of an episiotomy. You don't let anyone go near my vagina with a pair of scissors, you hear me?"

Hotch gave her a horrified look. "Absolutely not." Haley had to be induced for high blood pressure with Jack and after 3 days and minimal progress she had opted for a C-Section. To be honest he knew very little about pregnancy and childbirth. He was trying to be more present and informed this time around.

"Elizabeth Clemmons?" the medical assistant motioned for Hotch and Beth to follow her. "Alright, Miss. Clemons, before we do anything else I'm just going to grab your weight. If you could take off your shoes?"

Beth removed her shoes and handed her purse to Hotch before saying "turn it around, Hotchner."

Hotch looked at her skeptically. "You have got to be kidding me."

"Aaron!" Beth gave him a pleading look.

Hotch faked a big sigh and turned around facing the opposite direction of the scale. It was only a moment before she stepped off again and the MA led them into a little exam room before taking her vitals.

"Everything looks right on track. The ultrasonographer will be here soon and then your midwife will see you to discuss the results."

Hotch and Beth thanked her and she exited the room. Beth was officially halfway through her pregnancy and she was so excited to be able to take a look at their growing baby with Hotch. She had gotten an ultrasound when she first found out she was pregnant but the experience had been clouded by shock. There was a knock at the door and a woman hauling a large ultrasound machine entered the room. It was fairly cramped in the small room and Hotch took a seat next to the exam table.

"Miss. Clemmons, my name is Hannah and I'll be performing your ultrasound today. If you wouldn't mind laying down on the exam table for me and lifting your shirt and unbuttoning your pants we will go ahead and get started."

Beth hopped up onto the exam table and did as she was told. "Please, call me Beth."

Hannah smiled at her "will do Beth, and who did you bring with you today?"

"This is my partner Aaron."

Hotch stood and extended a hand which Hannah shook.

"Alright well if you don't mind let's go ahead and get started. First I'm just going to put this small pillow under your hip so that we get the best blood flow to the baby."

Beth adjusted herself and pulled the shirt up exposing her belly.

"You're still so small! How'd you get so lucky?!"

Beth felt a bit defensive. "My midwife assured me I'm gaining an appropriate amount of weight."

"I'm sorry if that seemed insensitive. I'm just jealous is all. By my third pregnancy I swear you could tell I was pregnant before I even missed a period!"

Beth smiled at her accepting the apology and Hannah got started. The cold gel on her bare skin made her shiver and the baby kicked in response.

"Oof baby is getting strong in there."

Hotch kissed her hand and watched the screen intently. Hannah showed them the outline of their baby's skull and spine, took measurements of the long bones, and let them listen to the heartbeat. Strong at 155 beats per minute. She moved the wand a bit and then asked them…

"Do you want to know the sex of your baby?"

Beth turned to look at Hotch. He looked back at her.

"Ultimately it's up to you, my love."

"Gahhh, no we want to wait until they're born." Beth told her.

Hannah laughed. "You sound conflicted."

"Aaron really wants to announce it at the birth. I was on board until right now when you could tell us and all I want to do is say yes!"

"Beth, we can find out if that's truly what you want."

"No, I want that moment with you. I really really do. We can wait." Hotch smiled at her and gave her a quick kiss.

"Alright guys, well I have everything I need! I'll print out a report and your midwife will be in soon to go over everything with you guys." She handed Beth a washcloth to wipe the gel off of her abdomen.

After a bit the midwife came in and measured her belly and once again assured her everything was going exactly as it should be. Hotch glanced at his watch.

"We have over an hour before the bus will drop Jack off at the house. Want to grab a late lunch?"

"Mm yes, baby is craving Thai food."

Hotch smiled at her. "Just the baby, huh?"

Hotch and Beth drove their separate cars and met at Cool Basil, their favorite Thai place. They ordered more than enough curries and noodles and bread because Beth claimed the baby was "extra hungry".

"So I had a thought?" Hotch told her.

"Just the one?" Beth joked back at him.

Hotch gave her his crooked smile. "As you know the BAU gets asked to present cases all the time at different conferences, universities, etc. but we almost never do it. However, there was a certain request that caught my eye. It's a forensic psychology conference which is neither here nor there. But! The conference is in San Diego. I figured the team can go and present and then you and Jack could fly out and meet me. We could have a long weekend together just the three of us before the baby gets here. What do you think?"

"I think that sounds amazing! When is the conference?"

"Early June. We would present on Thursday the morning of June 6th. Then you and Jack could fly out Thursday night so that Jack only misses one day of school. We can all fly back together on Sunday."

"That's a great thought you had Agent Hotchner. I'm impressed." Beth giggled at him.

"Better watch that sarcasm before I revoke your invitation, Miss. Clemmons." Hotch joked back at her. "We should go. I don't want Jack to come home to an empty house."

The three of them were settling nicely into their new house. Morgan had come and helped them paint the future nursery, they'd gone shopping for furniture to fit their new living and bed rooms. The house was bright and sunny, plenty of windows with light colored walls. The kitchen was big with an island that Jack would sit at while he watched Hotch or Beth make dinner. Jack loved to practice soccer in the backyard while they watched over him from the patio. Overall it was the perfect house for them and slowly but surely it was starting to feel like home.

Beth and Hotch waited in the driveway for Jack's bus to arrive. They were excited to show him pictures of his baby sibling and to tell him about their vacation to California. The bus came to the end of the driveway and they watched as he waved goodbye to his friends before running up the driveway to give them both a hug.

"How was school today, Jack?" His dad asked him.

"It was good. We had art class and I made a turtle out of clay."

"That's awesome Jack!" Beth told him.

"Can I ask you guys a question?"

"Of course bud," said Hotch.

"Did you guys have to have sex to put the baby in Beth's belly?"

Hotch and Beth looked at each other with an equal amount of fear in each other's eyes. Hotch hadn't been ready for this question yet. He had always used proper anatomical terms with Jack when teaching him about the human body, he knew that was important. But sex? Jack was only 7 years old! He hadn't even thought about having THAT talk with him.

"Buddy, why don't you go put your stuff down in your room and I'll come talk to you in a couple minutes okay?"

"Am I in trouble?"

"No, Jack. Of course not. I'll bring you some chocolate milk when I come up."

Jack nodded and went upstairs towards his new bedroom. Beth had remained silent during their discussion but followed Hotch to the kitchen.

"Sex?! Seriously?! I am not having that conversation with him today!"

"Aaron, I know he's young but clearly he's already getting information from someone. Wouldn't you rather it be from you than some kid he goes to school with? I know it's going to be awkward and I don't envy you, but it's important that you two have an open line of communication."

"Why just me? You don't think you're a part of this?!"

"Aaron. Be real. You are his dad! This can't come from anybody but you! Now get going, you're probably making him sweat up there."

Hotch reluctantly headed upstairs with a glass of chocolate milk and Beth smiled to herself. She really really didn't envy him right now. She wondered if she could still sucker him into having those conversations if they had a daughter? Beth poured herself a glass of iced tea and sat on one of the zero gravity chairs they had bought for the patio. She was enjoying the warm spring breeze when finally after 20 minutes Hotch and Jack came outside. She noticed that Jack wasn't quick to make eye contact with her and headed straight to the soccer ball in the yard. Aaron sat down next to her.

"What did you tell him?! He won't even look at me!"

"Don't worry he doesn't want to look at me or any other sexually active adults either. He's just embarrassed."

"How did it go?"

"I guess as good as can be expected. I told him what sex was and how it works. I tried to keep it technical by talking about sperm and eggs but it was tricky to take all the awkwardness out of it. I also talked to him about his own body and the changes he's going to go through soon, that was by far the worst part for the both of us."

"Did he tell you who told him about sex in the first place?"

"Yeah, some 10 year old on his bus. He wanted to seem cool in front of all the younger kids I guess."

"Jerk," was all Beth could come up with to say.

"Yeah. I guess it's a good thing it came up though. It's definitely not the end of the conversation. I'm sure he'll have more questions as he gets older and we need to talk to him about consent and everything else. I want him to be a good kid who knows he can ask me anything, but I also don't want to make him grow up too fast."

"Unfortunately we can't shelter him forever. I'd much rather he get this information from you than from some 10 year old on the bus… or even worse; porn he finds on the internet."

"Oh my god," Hotch groaned. "Please don't talk about my baby finding porn on the internet."

Beth laughed. "You're right. That's enough for one day. We have something better to talk about." Beth stood up and shouted "Jack! Come here! We have some photos of the baby we want to show you!"

Jack slowly made his way to the patio, still reluctant to look his two favorite people in the eye, but Beth and Hotch were determined to not make him feel uncomfortable and happily showed him pictures of the newest member of their family.


	8. Chapter 8

May 12, 2013 - 20 weeks pregnant

Beth woke up in an empty bed. She could smell bacon wafting up into their bedroom from the kitchen. Glancing over at the clock it wasn't even 8 AM yet. Why was Aaron up so early? Even if he woke up early on the weekends normally he'd lay in bed with her and read until 8 or so. Beth rolled out of bed and put her robe over her tank top and sleep shorts before making her way towards the kitchen.

"What are you two boys doing making breakfast so early today?!" She was happily surprised to see Jack adding blueberries to pancakes while Hotch minded the bacon.

"Nooooo Beth you have to go back to bed. You're ruining the surprise!" Jack said, sounding disappointed. Beth gave Hotch a confused look.

"You heard the boy! Get back into bed!"

Beth made her way back upstairs to use the bathroom before climbing back under the covers. It wasn't long before Jack and Hotch made their way into the room, Hotch carrying a tray of food and Jack carrying a bouquet of flowers.

"Happy Mothers Day, Beth!" Jack handed her the flowers excitedly. It was a beautiful and eclectic mix of roses and sunflowers.

"You guys! This is amazing!" Beth smelled the flowers and grinned. "Did you pick these out Jack?!

"Yeah" Jack smiled. "I picked some out for mom too. Irises because Dad said they were her favorite."

"That was really sweet of you Jack. C'mon, let's eat this feast you've prepared for us!"

The three of them chowed down on blueberry pancakes with maple syrup, crispy bacon, sliced strawberries and Beth sipped tea while Hotch drank coffee and Jack had orange juice. She would definitely have to change their sheets after their breakfast in bed but it was worth it.

"Buddy, why don't you go hop in the shower before we go see mom?"

Jack hopped off the bed and Beth gathered the dishes back onto the tray to take back downstairs.

"Absolutely not, you don't take care of dishes on Mother's Day!"

"You're sweet." Beth kissed him and his lips tasted like syrup. "Mm literally!" She laughed and licked her lips.

Hotch smiled at her and then brought a more serious look to his face. "Do you want to go visit Haley's grave with Jack and I?"

Aaron and Jack went fairly regularly to visit Haley's grave and even more regularly they would light a candle at bedtime and talk to her. Beth had kept a safe distance during these times not wanting to intrude on their time to remember her.

"I'm not sure that's the best idea," Beth told him honestly. "That's your time with Jack to talk about how much you miss her and to remember memories with her. I have nothing to bring to the table. Plus it's Mother's Day. I so appreciate what you and Jack did for me but I don't want Jack to feel like this day going forward is about me. She will always be his mother and he deserves to be able to spend today thinking about her - guilt free."

Hotch nodded. "I understand your hesitation. And I don't want you to come if you don't want to. But Beth, Jack was only four when his mother died. His memories of her are fading fast and soon all he will have is what me and Jessica tell him. I will never stop telling Jack about Haley but he deserves to have a mother in his life. Someone who loves him endlessly and will care for him like their own. That's you, Beth. That already is you. I don't want Jack to feel guilty about missing Haley, but I also don't want him to feel guilty about loving you."

Beth had tears running down her face. She hugged Hotch tightly. "I love you and Jack so much. You go with Jack today. Next time you go I'll come with, I promise."

Hotch kissed her cheek and placed his hand on her belly. "I love you." He kissed her lips and as he did he felt a distinct tap against his hand as the baby kicked. Hotch laughed "Yes you too little one."

Beth smiled and wiped the remnants of tears from her face.

"I'm going to hop in the shower and then can I run you a bath?"

Beth nodded at him. Hotch got off the bed and went into the master bath. Beth busied herself by taking the sheets off the bed and taking the dishes downstairs to the kitchen but true to her word she did not wash them. Jack came down the stairs hair wet and ready to go.

"Hey bud, you excited to visit your mom?"

"I guess so," Jack replied.

"You guess? What's up little man?" Beth asked him. Normally Jack had a good attitude about visiting Haley's grave. And Hotch always got them ice cream on the way home which Jack loved.

"It's just… sometimes visiting mom makes Dad and I sad. And I don't want us to be sad on Mother's Day.

"Come here, bud." Beth lifted him into a hug before setting him on the kitchen counter so they could be eye to eye. "I know that feeling sad isn't fun but that's just a part of missing someone. It hurts but you can't avoid it. Every year on Father's Day and his birthday I miss my dad so much, and sometimes I dread those days because I know how much it makes me miss him. But you know what, Jack. That sadness that we feel; it's just a reminder of how much we loved them."

Jack nodded.

"What's something fun we can do when you and your dad get home to make you feel happy? It's supposed to be a nice day, want to go for a bike ride?"

Jack nodded again.

"Alright, bud. That's what we'll do. Give me another hug." Jack wrapped his arms around Beth's waist and laid his head on her shoulder. Jack held on tight and Beth rubbed his back listening as his breathing evened.

"You ready to go, Jack?" Hotch called as he came down the stairs. As he reached the bottom he saw Jack let go of Beth and she helped him off the counter. Clearly they had been having a moment and he felt bad that he had ended it prematurely.

"I'm ready, Dad."

"Great!" Hotch went up to Beth and kissed her goodbye. "Your bath is ready. We'll see you later."

Jack and Hotch left and Beth gladly disrobed and sunk into the bath. One of her favorite features of their new house was the master bath. It featured a huge walk in shower fit with dual shower heads which came in very handy when Beth and Hotch decided to shower at the same time. It also featured a large clawfoot tub that was perfect for soaking. Hotch had clearly added bath salts and bubbles to the bath and she moaned as she got into the hot silky water.

Just as Beth was drifting off in the tub her phone rang; it was her mother.

"Hey mom," Beth tried to sound cheerful but was having a hard time with how relaxed she was.

"Hi Bethy! Happy Mother's Day to my favorite Mama to be!"

"Thanks, mom. Happy Mother's Day to you too! Did you get the flowers I sent?"

"Yes, they came yesterday. They're just beautiful!"

"I'm glad."

"So Bethy, I called because I wanted to talk to you about your baby shower. What weekends do you have free? I'm thinking sometime in July or August. We don't want to cut it too close to your due date!"

"Mom, I'm barely half-way pregnant. Do we have to decide this right now?"

"Yes, Beth!" Her mom sounded exasperated at her ambivalence. "Your sister will be flying in from Michigan so we want to give her plenty of notice. And there is a lot of planning to do!"

"Okay, mom. I don't have my planner with me right now but I promise to send you some weekends that will work for me later this morning. How are you doing?!"

Beth worried about her mother. She was still living in North Carolina where Beth had grown up but now her two daughters lived states away and her husband was gone. She had trusted friends and her dog, Gatsby, but Beth worried that she was lonesome. So they talked and they talked and soon Beth noticed the water in the tub was becoming chilled.

"Mom, I have to go. I'll send you those dates, okay?

"Okay. Beth I love you. You tell Aaron and Jack hello for me."

I will mom, I love you too. Happy Mother's Day."

Beth hung up the phone and eased out of the tub. She wrapped the towel around herself and dried off her body. She let the towel drop to the floor and gazed at her changing body. Her breasts were fuller and definitely had moments of tenderness. Her belly was obviously stretched when not masked by clothes; a smooth curve to her lower abdomen. She rubbed cocoa butter over her body and got ready for their bike ride, surely Jack and Aaron would be home soon.

Sure enough soon the boys were home and they biked to the park. Jack found friends to play with and Beth and Hotch walked laps around the park hand in hand. Later they biked home and played games of Sorry and Uno. They read more Harry Potter and ordered pizza for dinner and Beth tucked Jack into bed. She snuggled with him and he told her memories of his mother and she shared memories of her father. Her heart broke because she knew Hotch was right; Jack had very few concrete memories left of his mother and she knew what held most firmly in his brain was the day she died. She laid with him until he was asleep before she snuck out and found Hotch on the couch watching Game of Thrones with a beer.

"I KNOW you didn't start watching the new episode without me," she told him threateningly.

Hotch threw his hands up in defense. "I'll rewind it, you were taking forever!"

She glared at him before settling in next to him. Hotch got back to the beginning and was about to hit play.

"Just one thing before we start!"

Hotch looked at her. "Do you need a snack?"

Beth shook her head no and stood up before setting herself back down on Hotch straddling him. She wrapped her fingers into his short hair and tilted his head back before kissing him deeply. She let her tongue find his and she didn't stop until they were both gasping for air.

"I just really love you," Beth panted. "And I needed to do that before we sit here glued to the TV for the next 60 minutes of our lives."

"Oh babe, if there's something else you'd rather be doing I'll happily put off watching Game of Thrones until tomorrow!"

Beth laughed. "Yes, but Spencer and Garcia would be so disappointed in you when they couldn't recap with you tomorrow."

"I'm ashamed I have this in common with them."

Beth giggled again. "Play the damn TV, Hotchner."

"How can you NOT want Jon and Ygritte to be together?!" Beth asked him forcefully as they got ready for bed.

"It's not that I don't want them to be together; I just don't see how they can make it work! They're completely different people!"

"Hotchner. That cave scene! Trust me - they'll make it work."

"So you're telling me that if the sex is good then nothing else matters? Is that what I'm hearing right now?" Hotch looked at her smirking.

Beth walked towards him and gave him a sly smile. "Why do you think I'm with you, Aaron?" She asked him coyly.

Hotch grabbed onto her and kissed her. He backed her up against the bathroom counter as he kissed her and pulled down her pajama bottoms. With her bottoms off and her lower half exposed, Hotch lifted her up and set her on the edge of the bathroom counter and spread her knees before burying his face into her. Beth moaned loudly and arched her back. She placed her hands behind her on the counter to support herself and placed her legs over Hotch's shoulders as she felt him latch onto her clit. He alternated between licking and sucking and just as Beth would be about to go over the edge he'd ease up and it was driving her _crazy. _

"Aaaaaaron," she whined. Wanting the torturous game to end and yet continue forever.

Hotch pulled her legs from off his shoulders and met his lips with hers. He kissed her deeply. Personally she could take or leave the kissing after oral but she knew it was one of his biggest turn ons so she let him have it. He pulled her off the counter and back onto her feet before facing her around so they were both looking at their reflections in the mirror.

"You ready, baby?" Beth nodded. "Brace yourself."

Beth leaned forward and grabbed the counter to steady herself. Hotch entered her from behind and they both moaned simultaneously. Hotch pounded into her and Beth stared at his face in the reflection. She loved to watch him lose control. He entered her over and over and over again while playing with her nipples, her clit, pulling her hair, whatever he could do to occupy the hand that wasn't firmly holding her hip.

"Oh my god, Aaron. Oh my god oh my god oh my god." Beth couldn't help herself. "Fuck, Aaron," she exclaimed as she fell over the edge.

With a few more thrusts Aaron followed her into oblivion. Beth let go of the counter and stood back up leaning into Hotch's bare chest.. They both caught their breath.

"See, Hotchner? When the sex is that good you don't give it up without a fight."


	9. Chapter 9

June 7th, 2013 - 24 weeks pregnant

"C'mon bud, we're back at the house. Let's brush teeth and get you to bed."

Aaron pulled Jack out of the car and carried him to their AirBnb. They had spent the morning at the San Diego Zoo and the afternoon and evening at LegoLand. Jack was exhausted and had fallen asleep in the car. Jack could barely keep his eyes open and laid his head on his dad's shoulder as Beth unlocked the front door.

"Or maybe we'll just skip teeth brushing tonight and go straight to bed," Hotch smiled at his tired son.

Hotch laid him in the bed in the guest bedroom and took off his shoes before tucking him under the covers and kissing his forehead.

"Sleep tight, Jack. We love you."

Turning out the light he stepped out of the room and closed the door. He noticed Beth was out on their balcony and he grabbed himself a glass of scotch before joining her. Beth smiled at him as he opened the sliding glass door.

"Out like a light?" She asked him.

"Out like a light." He confirmed.

Beth moved her feet so he could sit next to her on the couch before she put them back on his lap when he sat down. He lightly rubbed her feet with one hand while sipping his scotch with the other.

"You know what would be nice?" Beth asked him.

"Hm?"

"Take a long drink of that scotch and let it linger in your mouth a bit before you kiss me."

Hotch laughed. "Jonesing for a drink are you?"

"I didn't realize how much I enjoyed our night caps until I couldn't have them anymore!" Beth whined. "First thing you're doing after I push out this baby is pouring me a glass of champagne."

Hotch took a drink. "Deal." He leaned over and kissed Beth letting her taste the scotch still on his lips.

"Mm damn that's stiff."

Hotch smiled and shook his head. He lifted up Beth's shirt and placed his hand over her belly softly rubbing.

"And how's my favorite fetus doing?" The baby seemed to do a somersault under his hand. "That good, huh? Do you like it in there? We can't wait to meet you!"

Beth smiled as the baby continued to move and kick at the sound of Hotch's voice.

"That baby loves nothing more than kicking in the middle of the night and to the sound of your voice."

"A babe after my own heart." Hotch said as he leaned down and kissed her belly before pulling her shirt back down. "Have you been thinking about names at all?"

"A bit? I don't know. It almost seems too early. I guess I don't want to get stuck on a name and then feel like I can't change my mind."

"Well that's the beauty of not knowing the sex," Hotch smirked at her. "We can't be dead set on a name if we don't know if it's a girl or a boy. So we can change our minds whenever we want!"

"I don't want our kid to be named something that no one will ever be able to pronounce, but I also don't want them to have the same name as five other kids in their class. I graduated with at least four other Elizabeth's. What are some other names that you like?"

"I kind of like old fashion names for girls; like Hazel or Margot. For boys I tend to like the classics; Alexander, Andrew, names like that.

"I like all of those names. I just don't feel like any of them stand out as something I desperately want to name my kid. I don't know why!"

"Naming a kid is a big deal! We barely had Jack's name picked out before we went to the hospital - and with him we knew he was a boy so we truly didn't have an excuse."

"And to think; this will probably be the least stressful part about having a baby."

Hotch laughed. "That's almost a guarantee."

Beth chuckled before yawning loudly.

Hotch stood up and helped pull her off the couch. "Come on, dear. Let's go to bed."

Beth happily followed him into the bedroom and curled up next to him before falling asleep in his arms.

June 8th, 2013 - 24 weeks pregnant

Hotch poked his head into the bathroom where Beth was curling her hair. "Hey, I'm just going to go drop off Jack at JJ and Will's. I'll be back in like 15 minutes."

JJ and Will had rented an AirBnb near Beth and Hotch's and had offered to watch Jack so that Beth and Hotch could have a date night in San Diego. They had spent a majority of the day at the beach and Jack and Henry had loved playing on the beach and in the ocean. Morgan jumped waves with them and Emily and Garcia built sand castles with them. Needless to say Henry and Jack were provided with endless entertainment thanks to the members of the team. Beth was weirdly exhausted after lying on the beach all day but was looking forward to a night out with Hotch. She finished curling her hair and started doing her makeup - she was wearing a dress she had bought with JJ and Emily when they went shopping together before the trip. It was a black maxi dress that had long sleeves and a deeper V that made her boobs look good. It was form fitting while still being flowy and accentuated her bump perfectly.

Beth heard Hotch come back through the front door and he made his way toward the bathroom. She packed away the last of her makeup.

"You look amazing," he told her.

Beth smiled at him. "You look pretty fine yourself."

He did look fine. He was wearing navy dress pants with a white button down shirt tucked in. He finished off the look with a belt and dress shoes. It was less formal than he work attire and just oozed sex appeal.

Hotch held out his hand. "You ready to go?"

Beth happily took his hand and followed him out the door.

"Do I get to know where we're going yet?" She asked him.

"You'll figure it out soon enough." He told her with a smile.

After a bit of walking she noticed they were taking the same path they had taken earlier in the day.

"Are we going back to the beach?"

Hotch just shrugged and kept walking. Sure enough soon they were back at the beach overlooking the Pacific ocean; the sun was setting and it was gorgeous. Beth took off her shoes as Hotch started to lead them down towards the water.

"Is that Jack?"

Beth saw what appeared to be Jack up ahead. He was standing on a large white sheet with rose petals and flameless tealight candles. He was holding a dozen roses and smiled as they got closer to them.

"Aaron, what is this?!"

Hotch still didn't answer her. Just led her to the sheet in the sand where Jack handed his dad the roses and a small black box before giving Beth a big hug. Hotch got down on one knee and Beth could feel tears starting to form in her eyes.

"Beth, for two years now you have brought exponentially more joy into our lives. You have been a beacon of hope, a source of comfort, and my closest friend. I love you more than I ever could have thought possible and I can't imagine the rest of my life without you by my side. Would you do me the greatest honor of marrying me?"

Beth nodded her head up and down as tears started to fall down her cheeks. "Yes, of course I will marry you!"

Hotch stood and gathered her in his arms. He held onto her tight before releasing her just enough to kiss her. Beth heard cheering in the background and immediately recognized it as members of his team. She distinctly heard Morgan yell 'atta boy, Hotch!'. Hotch chuckled against her lips and pulled back. He took the ring out of the box and slid it onto her left ring finger. She hadn't even looked at it while he was proposing, she was too teary eyed. As he placed it on her finger she gazed at it. It featured a large oval shaped diamond in the middle, with two diamond halos around the center diamond. The band was white gold and featured small diamonds on the top side of the band. It was beautiful and sparkly, it was large but still managed to look delicate on her thin and long finger. It was perfect.

"It's beautiful," she whispered to Hotch.

"Can I see it?!" Jack asked.

Hotch reached down and lifted him up. Beth gave him a kiss on his cheek before showing him the ring which he audibly admired. The rest of the team emerged from wherever they had been hiding and greeted them with hugs and words of congratulations. Beth felt like she couldn't stop smiling. They took the celebration to a nearby restaurant on the beach where they were able to sit outside and enjoy the rest of the sunset. There was champagne waiting for everyone. Hotch handed her a glass.

"I asked the midwife and she said half a glass wouldn't hurt. Cheers, my love." Beth clinked her flute with Hotch's before taking a swig. It tasted bubbly and delicious and she tipped the rest into Hotch's glass before she felt tempted to drink more. Hotch placed his arm around her shoulder and kissed her temple. The conversation flowed easily as the team celebrated together. Beth was pleased that despite being in the presence of others he kept almost constant physical contact with her; a hand on her leg, an arm around her shoulder, a few kisses.

Beth and Hotch shared scallops with brussel sprouts and mashed potatoes and despite only eating half the meal she felt stuffed. Hotch leaned over and whispered in her ear.

"How about we get our dessert to go?"

Beth nodded and Hotch ordered the chocolate cake to go.

"Daddy can I come home with you and Beth?" Jack asked him.

"Not tonight bud, you're going to have a sleepover with Henry!"

Jack nodded looking a tad bummed but Hotch knew he would have fun with JJ, Will, and Henry.

"We're going out for breakfast before our flight home so we'll see you early in the morning, okay?!" Beth told him.

Jack nodded again, still trying not to look sad.

"Can I have a hug goodbye?" Hotch asked. Jack hugged his father tight and Beth joined in, giving the boy a kiss on his head.

"We love you so much Jack," Beth told him.

Hotch and Beth walked back to their house quickly. Hotch put the cake in the fridge for later; there were currently more important things on his mind.

"Want to take a shower with me?"

Beth nodded and led them to the bathroom. She turned the shower on to a steamy temperature and lifted her dress over her head. If she had known how important tonight was going to be she would have chosen to wear lingerie but even in her everyday bra and undies Hotch looked at her like she was the sexiest thing he had ever seen. She grabbed him by the belt and pulled him to her lips. She started undoing his belt while she kissed him before untucking and unbuttoning his shirt. She ran her hands up and down his torso, she could feel the scars under her fingertips. Steam started to fill the room and they separated to finish getting undressed before getting in the shower.

They stood under the steam of hot water. Hotch pulled her tight against him and captured her lips once again. Hot water ran down their bodies as their tongues danced with one another. Beth was in sensory overload. It was hot, Hotch's hands and lips were everywhere, her body was pressed against his, the air was wet with steam. Hotch pushed her against the wall of the shower and the cool tile was a relief against her back. She hitched one leg around Hotch's hip and he entered her. Beth held onto him for dear life trying to maintain her balance as he repeatedly thrusted into her. The hot water continued to pound on Hotch's back but he couldn't focus on anything except Beth and the way she felt around him, he couldn't control the moans coming from his mouth.

"Oh my god, Beth." Hotch groaned as he emptied himself inside of her. He felt Beth contract around him as she orgasmed just after he did. Hotch slowly pulled himself out of her and Beth sunk down to sit in the shower.

"Will you turn the water off?" She asked him. Hotch did and lowered himself to sit with her.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah," Beth smiled at him. "Just a little light headed. That was intense." Hotch gave her a worried look. "I'm fine. Go get our chocolate cake and meet me on the balcony?"

Hotch stood up and pulled her up with him, he left the bathroom and the opening of the bathroom door helped release some of the steam allowing Beth to take a deep breath. She washed her face with cool water and pulled her wet hair into a bun on top of her head. Walking out onto the balcony she sat down next to Hotch and snuggled next to him. He hadn't started eating the cake without her and Beth happily accepted the first bite that he offered to her.

"Oh damn, that's good." Beth told him as she reached for the extra fork to get another bite. Hotch laughed and took a bite himself.

"It only hurts a little bit that you're more enthusiastic about the cake than you were about the sex." Hotch joked with her. Beth gently elbowed him in the ribs and took another bite of the cake. "I just want to make sure you know… the absolute only reason I proposed to you is because I love you and want to marry you?"

Beth looked confused. "Should I assume you proposed to me for a different reason? My money?!"

Hotch laughed. "No, of course not. I just don't want you to think that I feel obligated because of the baby. I am so excited about this baby but that's not why I want to marry you. I want to marry you because I truly can't imagine my life without you."

Beth reached out and cupped his face. "I love you so much. I never doubted your intentions, Aaron. Plus, you're not exactly one to feel pressured into doing something you're not comfortable with." Hotch smiled at her and Beth leaned in and kissed him softly. "Now why don't we take this to the bedroom and I'll show you exactly how enthusiastic I can be."


	10. Chapter 10

June 19th, 2013 - 26 weeks pregnant

"Beth. Beth" Beth groggily tried to open her eyes. She could feel her shoulder being lightly shaken and heard Jack saying her name.

"Hey buddy, what are you doing awake? It's the middle of the night."

"I had a nightmare," he said softly. "Can I sleep with you?"

"Of course," Beth scooched over to Aaron's side of the bed and Jack climbed in next to her. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Jack shook his head no. "It was about mom."

"That's okay, Jack. You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

Jack curled up next to her and Beth heard as his breath evened out and he was back asleep. She herself felt wide awake, she glanced at the alarm clock. It was not quite 2 AM and she had to go to work in the morning but her mind was spinning. She had made it a point to never ask Aaron about what happened to Haley, she wanted him to tell her on his own terms. Of course she knew the basics of the story; she had been murdered by a serial killer that the team was tracking, but that was it. She knew no details, she didn't know the extent of Jack's involvement, or if the killer was rotting in jail somewhere. As her relationship with Aaron had progressed she wanted to ask him but had never summoned the courage, and while Aaron spoke of Haley every so often, he never brought up her death willingly. Beth looked at the sleeping boy next to her and did what she promised herself she would never do; she googled Haley Hotchner.

Beth felt horribly guilty, but the more she read the more she felt like she couldn't stop. The Reaper. That's what he was called. He had murdered dozens of people and mutilated his own body just to toy with law enforcement. He was dead. Finally after clicking on every single article that she hoped would give her a shred of new information she set the phone down. She felt sick. Sick due to reading the gruesome details of Haley's killer and sick from the guilt that she now knew information that Aaron hadn't willingly given to her.

Beth curled up next to the boy and tried to rest but sleep didn't come easy and when it did it was fraught with dreams of the women she had only seen in pictures. Finally her alarm went off after a restless night.

"Come on, Jack. It's time to get ready for Aunt Jessie's."

Jack dragged himself out of bed and back into his room to change. Beth entered the bathroom to get into the shower and groaned at the dark circles under her eyes. She had a client meeting at 10 and she wasn't sure all the concealer in the world would hide them.

Beth took a selfie of her and Jack in the car and texted it to Hotch before she dropped him off at his Aunts.

*We miss and love you. Stay safe!*

Hotch had been gone to Atlanta on a case for over two nights now and she knew he was itching to get home. Beth was trying to brainstorm the best way to tell him about her newfound knowledge but was coming up empty. She kissed Jack goodbye and headed into work feeling tired and overwhelmed. Shortly before her meeting she got a text back.

*Headed home now. Can't wait to see you both. Will try and catch up on a bit of paperwork at the office but will be home before 5. Love you.*

Beth wasn't sure what to say so she just sent him a smiley face and heart emoji. She knew she was being irrational. Hotch would understand, wouldn't he? She couldn't be sure and the anxiety was making it hard to focus, she needed to get through her client meeting and then she would work from home for the rest of the day hoping she would be more productive there.

"Beth, I'm home!" She heard Aaron call from downstairs. She had been productive at home, just not with work. Her nervous energy had helped her catch up on the laundry, clean the bathrooms, and now she was putting a bookshelf together in the nursery. She glanced at her watch, it wasn't quite 4PM. He was home earlier than she had expected.

"I'm in the nursery!" She yelled back to him. She heard him come up the stairs.

"Hey," he said as he walked in. "I missed you."

Beth stood up to kiss him. "You're home early."

"Yeah, I wanted to be home before Jack. Jessie said she would drop him back off around 4. The team put in enough hours over the past couple days I figured we could sneak out a little early today."

"Hey, can I talk to you about something?" Beth tried to play it cool, as if it was no big deal, but she knew Aaron saw right through her.

"What's up?"

She looked at the floor. God this was embarrassing. "Jack slept in our bed with me the other night, he had a nightmare, but I couldn't fall back asleep. My mind was racing and I... I googled Haley."

"What do you mean?" Hotch seemed confused.

"I googled her and read about what happened. I'm so sorry, Aaron. My curiosity got the better of me. I'm sorry."

"Beth, I figured you had done that years ago."

Beth looked up from the floor. "What?"

"I just assumed you would have done it shortly after we started dating. I mean I figured any reasonable person would want to know what had happened. It was the only explanation I could think of for why you never asked me about it."

"No, I never did. Not until last night. I was curious, of course. But I wanted to know on your own terms and the longer you went without bringing it up the more I felt bad about asking."

"Beth, you're going to be my wife. You're the mother of my child and for all intents and purposes you're Jack's mom too. You are a part of this family and you shouldn't feel bad about asking me anything. I won't keep anything from you, I promise. Do you want to hear what happened? From my perspective?"

Beth just nodded feeling overwhelmed and relieved at the same time.

Hotch checked his watch. "Jack's bus will be here in just a few minutes. Let's talk after he goes to bed, okay?"

Beth nodded again and reached out to hug him. "I love you. I'm sorry I didn't just ask."

Jack came home and the evening passed peacefully. Hotch grilled burgers for them and Beth cut up watermelon and made potato salad. After dinner they settled on the couch and Hotch finished reading Order of the Phoenix aloud to them. Jack couldn't get enough of the series and they had fun watching the movies together as a family after finishing each of the books.

"Well Jack, what did you think?" Beth asked him.

"Sometimes I thought it was kind of confusing, but I really liked it. Professor Umbridge was really mean and I'm not sure why you would be a teacher if you're really mean."

"I'm not sure either, Jack." His dad agreed with him.

"I really liked Luna, she was super brave. I think if the baby is a girl we should name her Luna."

"You think so," Beth asked him. "What if we have a boy?"

"Hmm I'm not sure. But definitely Luna for a girl."

Hotch laughed. "We'll add it to the list, bud. Should we watch the movie this weekend?"

"Yes!" Jack yelled. Clearly excited about the idea.

"Jack I have to go into work in the morning but I have the afternoon off. I have to go see the midwife to check up on the baby. Do you want to come with me or do you want to stay with Aunt Jessie?"

"What do they do at the midwife?"

"Well usually they measure my belly to make sure the baby is growing, and they listen to the baby's heartbeat, and then they answer any questions I have."

"I want to go with you!"

"Sounds fun! I'll pick you up from Aunt Jessie's and we can get lunch before the appointment. But right now it's your bedtime so go put PJ's on, okay?"

Jack nodded and ran off to his room. Beth turned to Hotch.

"Is it strange that I actually really like the idea of Luna for a girl?"

Hotch laughed. "No, I like it too. Plus, she is kind of a badass."

"Luna Hotchner… It has a nice ring to it!"

Hotch kissed her then stood from the couch. "We'll put it at the top of the list. But right now we gotta get that hooligan in bed."

They both went in and kissed Jack goodnight.

"You'll be here in the morning, Dad?"

"Yeah bud, I'll be here in the morning. Sleep tight."

Hotch closed the door and started walking toward the kitchen. "Do you want something to drink?"

"Just water, thanks." Beth suddenly felt awkward. Their evening had been nice, normal. But now the conversation that had been looming was here.

Hotch got her a glass of water and poured himself a glass of bourbon. Beth stood at the island watching him. He picked up both the glasses and motioned toward the couch.

"Let's sit."

Beth followed him, still not saying anything. They sat down next to each other and Beth sat cross legged on the couch, turned to face Hotch. Hotch took a big swig of his drink.

"It was my first case as a senior BAU agent…"

Hotch started at the beginning. He told her every aspect of the case. Initially being sent away, being called back on Shaunessy's death bed to his confession, the killings that had started again. He told her what their theories were and how they came to discover that Foyet, a presumed victim, was in fact The Reaper. He then told her about how he slipped into his apartment and waited until he got home. How he stabbed him 9 times while taunting him, telling him to relax.

Beth tried to keep her facial expressions under control. She knew Hotch didn't want her pity, but she couldn't help herself. She reached out her hand and placed it on his abdomen, over the scars she had come to love and was now realizing how much he hated them. He took her hand and held it in his while he continued on.

Hotch told her his chilling realization in the hospital bed when he realized Foyet was planning on going after Jack and Haley. And the intense relief he felt when they were safely brought to the hospital before going into custody of the US Marshals. He expressed his heartbreak over not being able to see Jack for months and Beth couldn't imagine how he did it. Hotch hated when a case lasted more than two nights. Beth began to squeeze his hand as he recounted the day when Foyet tricked Haley into meeting him with Jack in the home they had shared as a family. She squeezed harder and harder until her fingers were turning white as he told her about the phone call, how Haley realized what was happening, that when she squeezed Jack "too tight" she knew it would be the last time she got to squeeze him at all. By the time Hotch told her he heard the shot that killed the mother of his child she had tears streaming down her face and his eyes were brimming with tears as well.

Beth released her grip on his hands and she felt the blood rush back into the tips of her fingers. She wrapped her arms around Hotch's shoulders and leaned in so her forehead was pressed against his temple. Hotch reached up and held onto the arm across his chest and for a moment they just sat there. Her head against his, he could feel the tears on her cheeks.

"I got there and I saw her body and all I felt was rage. Pure rage. I killed him, Beth. With my bare hands I killed him. I just kept punching a corpse until the rest of them arrived and Derek pulled me off of him. And then I lost it. He had just left her laying there, he had stabbed her like he had me, but she was already gone. He stabbed her just to do it. Just so I would see it. I held her lifeless body in my arms and just sobbed. The only thing that got me off that floor was Jack. I hadn't seen him yet and I needed to know if he was safe. I ran to my old office and there he was. Hiding inside the bench."

Beth felt a flood of irrational relief. Jack was safe and sound asleep upstairs, she knew that, so why did she feel so relieved?

Hotch was still holding on to her arm, and her forehead was still against the side of his. Slowly she pulled her hand to his chest, over his heart, and placed a kiss against his temple.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered to him. "Let's go to bed."

It was early, barely past 9 PM, but they were both exhausted.

Hotch nodded and they stood and went upstairs. Beth chose to wear sleep shorts and a sports bra to bed, her breasts feeling too heavy and tender to not be contained, and the rest of her was too warm for too much clothing. She slid in next to Hotch and he placed his hand over the bare skin of her belly, she tucked herself against him.

"I love you," he whispered to her.

"I love you too."


	11. Chapter 11

June 29th, 2013 - 27 weeks pregnant

"I can't believe you're ditching me after I've been gone almost all week!" Hotch teased her.

"Should have worked harder to catch your bad guy, I guess." Beth teased him right back.

"Oof the savagery," Hotch laughed. "Tell that to the girls when you see them, they're just as much to blame as I am."

"You're their unit chief!"

Hotch just shrugged and smiled. Beth was getting ready for a "girls night" with JJ, Emily, and Penelope. She was honored that they were including her.

"Be careful tonight, don't get into too much trouble."

"Aaron, I'm nearly 28 weeks pregnant. What kind of trouble do you think I can get into?"

"I'm just saying, I've heard stories about what goes on during those girls nights. And I've seen how dirty Emily can dance when she's drunk enough."

Beth gave him a sharp look. "You've seen WHAT?"

"Just because I've seen it doesn't mean I've participated in it!"

"Mhm next time keep your eyes to yourself, Hotchner."

"I'd rather keep my eyes on you. Here. In our bed. Naked."

"Nice try but I'm not bailing on the girls. What are you and Jack going to do while I'm gone?"

"He told me he'd help me paint the nursery so I think that's the plan. Followed by ice cream and a movie of course."

"Of course." Beth checked her watch. "I should get going. I'm picking up Emily and Penelope at Em's house and I don't want to be late."

Beth leaned in and gave him a quick kiss but Hotch caught her as she started to walk away and pulled her back for a longer kiss. Beth relaxed into his arms and cupped his face with one hand while holding on to his waist with the other. Hotch sucked on her lower lip and ran his tongue across it before releasing her.

"Now you may go," Hotch told her, looking pleased with himself.

Beth headed downstairs and kissed Jack's head as he worked on homework at the island in the kitchen. "Bye, bud. Love you."

"Bye mom, love you."

Beth froze for a second. She looked at Jack but he didn't look up from his homework. He clearly didn't notice he had called her mom. She didn't want to make a big deal about it and make him uncomfortable so she headed out the door with the biggest smile on her face.

She drove to Emily's apartment and her and Penelope were waiting for her outside the building. They piled into her car and she greeted them excitedly. Penelope wasted no time in reaching across the center console and rubbing her belly.

"Ahh you're so much bigger than the last time we saw you! How is our little mini FBI agent doing in there?!"

I'm sure she loves being told how big she is, Penelope." Emily piped up from the back seat rolling her eyes. "Don't mind her, it's possible we had a bit too much wine before you arrived."

Beth laughed. "It's no problem, it's the truth! Baby Hotchner is very much making themselves known to the world these days. But we're good!"

Beth backed out of the parking space and headed towards the speakeasy where they were meeting JJ. She had never been but JJ assured them it was the perfect mix of a fun nightclub with the chill atmosphere of a distillery. When they got there JJ had already gotten them a booth. There were people dancing to the live music but it wasn't overwhelming, she could still talk easily with them.

"How are you feeling, Beth?" JJ asked her as Beth sat down next to her. "Feeling really good, actually! So far the first trimester nausea has been the worst of it."

"Well you look great! I'm so impressed you're waiting to find out if it's a boy or a girl. When I was pregnant with Henry I counted down the days until my 20 week scan so I could find out."

Beth laughed. "I'm starting to feel really impatient. Mostly I just want to be able to say she or he rather than they or "the baby". But Aaron really wants to wait and honestly he asks for so little I figured I could give him this one thing."

"Aww that's so sweet!" Penelope said.

"What is he hoping for?" Emily asked her.

"Honestly I'm not sure. He says he doesn't care either way. I secretly think he wants a girl though.

"What about you?" JJ asked.

"I think it would be cool to give Jack a baby brother but I was so close with my dad so I think it would be amazing if we had a girl and Aaron could have that bond with her"

"What is it about men and babies that is just so damn hot?!" Penelope asked to no one in particular.

"I'm sure Spencer would tell us it has something to do with our hormones and our womanly instinct to want to mate with a partner that is a good caretaker blah blah blah." Emily said.

"Well, all I know is that Will is never sexier than when he is playing with Henry. I swear to god if he wants to get in my pants all he does is ignore me to play Lego's with Henry and he knows the second Henry is asleep I'm going to jump him."

Beth laughed loudly. The waiter came and the rest of the table ordered cocktails, Beth stuck with a Diet Coke.

"What about you, Em? Any men that you're currently finding interesting?"

Emily sighed. "Girl, I've started buying my batteries from Costco because my vibrator is the only thing getting me off these days."

Penelope nodded aggressively in agreement. "You two don't know how good you have it. Hot men in your bed whenever you want them."

"Well I have been where you ladies have been and I am definitely grateful for Aaron but with his work schedule… trust me, my vibrator gets plenty of usage."

They all laughed and Emily held up her glass. "To vibrators!"

"To vibrators!" They clinked glasses.

"Aaron tried to convince me to stay home with him tonight since you guys were gone so much this week. Maybe I should buy him something to help him occupy his time."

Emily and JJ laughed while Penelope covered her eyes with her hands. "I'm just having a hard time picturing my straight laced boss doing anything remotely dirty ever!" She said red in the face.

Beth laughed. "It took a while to break him out of his shell. I approached him first, I kissed him first, and I definitely seduced him first!"

"How long did you wait?!" JJ asked her, clearly curious.

"It was 3 months after our first date that we finally had sex which to be fair with your guy's work schedule and his schedule with Jack was really only like 8 dates but still; it felt like forever."

"Damn, Will and I didn't wait that long and we weren't even living in the same state."

"If I waited 3 months to have sex with every man I've ever dated I wouldn't have had sex in years…" Emily said

Beth laughed. "I think he was just nervous. He met Haley in high school so he never had to date as an adult. It's wild out there. Gosh, we should change the subject. He would not appreciate me telling you guys' this. And I don't have the drunk excuse either."

"Let's dance!" Penelope suggested as she finished her drink. "And get another drink!"

They moved to the dance floor with fresh drinks in their hands. Beth switched to water and the rest of the girls switched to shots. They had fun dancing together to the music. Aaron was right, Emily did look sultry when she danced, she knew how to move her hips. The night passed quickly and eventually Emily and Penelope were too drunk to remain coherent. JJ was a bit better but not by much.

"Will's here to pick me up, his mother is in town so she's staying with the boys."

"I should probably get them home."

JJ and Beth corralled Emily and Penelope outside where Will was waiting. JJ hugged them goodbye and the girls all shouted hi to Will in his car. He smiled and waved, clearly not his first time picking JJ up from girls night.

"Alright ladies, let's get you back home. Tell me if you're going to be sick and I'll stop the car."

"No worries my magical human growing friend, we may be drunk but we can hold our liquor." Penelope assured her.

Beth smiled at her new nickname and started the short drive back to Emily's apartment. She made sure they got into her apartment safely before driving home. It was past 2 AM when she pulled her car into the garage. Trying to be quiet she snuck her way through the house and stepped into the nursery. Turning on the lights she admired Jack and Aaron's handy work, they had painted the nursery a light gray and it was perfect.

"Not bad, right."

She jumped, surprised to hear Aaron's voice behind her.

"You're still awake!"

"I heard the garage door open."

"I'm sorry," Beth felt bad for waking him up.

"I'm not," Hotch stepped close to her and kissed her slowly. "Did you have fun?"

Beth nodded. "Perhaps a bit too much fun."

Aaron laughed. "I'm not going to ask. Let's go to bed."

Beth went to the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth before joining Hotch in bed.

"If you're not too tired we could make up for all the nights away this week?" Beth asked him.

Hotch rolled onto his side so he was facing her. "Definitely not too tired."

Beth grinned and leaned in to kiss him. Hotch moved himself so his body laid touching hers from their lips to their toes.

"Soon this baby is really going to start getting in our way," he told her.

"Guess you'll just have to get creative," Beth winked at him.

Beth pulled her underwear off from under her nightgown and pushed Hotch down onto his back before getting on top of him. Her midwife had told her to avoid laying on her back for extended periods of time after her 20th week of pregnancy and while Beth did love being on top she missed the weight of Hotch pressed on top of her during good ol' missionary.

She grinded against him a couple of times before yanking his pajama bottoms down. He was ready and all the talk of sex with the girls had her ready long before she even got home. She slid herself down onto him and moaned at the delicious fullness.

Beth had always assumed that if and when she got married she would miss the days of being single. Being able to sleep with whoever she wanted whenever she wanted without feeling guilty. But as she rocked herself back and forth on top of Aaron Hotchner she felt sure that nothing was better than this.


	12. Chapter 12

July 17th, 2013 - 30 weeks pregnant

Beth was relaxing on the couch when she heard the garage door open signaling Hotch's return home. He had been called to Texas the morning before but luckily had only been gone one night. She got up and went to the kitchen to pour him a glass of scotch as he came through the garage door.

"Hey," he said to her as he swooped in to give her a quick kiss. "Did your mom get to her gate okay?

Beth's mom Rosie had come to stay with them for 5 days and had thrown her a baby shower over the weekend. It had been wonderful having her mom and sister stay with them and she had shed a few tears when she dropped her mom off at the airport. Her sister had only been able to stay the weekend and had left a few days prior.

"Yeah, Jack and I dropped her off and she texted me that they had boarded. She should be landing soon."

Beth handed Hotch the scotch she had poured for him.

"I'm sorry that I couldn't be here to say goodbye to her."

"I'm sure she was sorry too; I think she's got a bit of a crush on you. She loves to brag about you to all the women in her bible study."

Hotch laughed and pulled her in for a hug.

"I hope she's not the only Clemmons woman to have a crush on me."

"No, definitely not the only one," Beth smiled at him before kissing him again. "She does have quite a controversial opinion about what we should name this baby, though"

"Oh?"

"She thinks if it's a boy we should name him after my father."

"Eugene?!" Hotch failed miserably at attempting to hide the horrified look on his face.

Beth laughed. "Trust me, I shot her down immediately. Even my dad didn't like his own name, he would roll over in his grave if I named our son after him. She's still pushing for it as a middle name though."

"Let's just hope for a girl."

"Agreed!"

Hotch placed his hands on her belly and felt the little kicks of their baby recognizing the sounds of their voices.

"How's our half baked human doing in there?"

"Officially ¾'s baked now!"

"Getting so close! You hang in there 10 more weeks, little one." Beth smiled as Hotch spoke to their baby. His hands were warm on her belly and they felt extremely comforting.

"Your mom sent a sweet card with a giftcard to Target inside. We should call her." Beth said softly. She knew Hotch's parents could be a touchy subject.

"And why is it exactly that she couldn't just come to your shower? Hotch let annoyance flood his tone.

"Aaron,"

"I know that my dad was terrible to her, Beth. I know that because he was terrible to Sean and I too. But we don't get to wallow in self pity and never leave the house."

Beth reached out and took his hands into hers.

"You don't, Aaron. You don't know what she experienced. You only know what you saw but you'll never know what you didn't see. You know the absolute minimum of what she went through. And I know he was terrible to you and you never deserved that. Nobody does. But you show so much grace to everyone around you, maybe try and save some for her."

Hotch squeezed her hands. "I'll call her in the morning."

Beth smiled gently at him. "Go relax on the couch, watch some trash TV, I'll heat you up some leftovers."

Hotch nodded and kissed her cheek before settling in on the couch and turning Friends back on. He didn't particularly find it as humorous as Beth did but it was certainly mindless which was exactly what he needed. Beth brought him leftover ravioli and garlic bread; it was delicious and he nearly inhaled it.

"So speaking of grandparents," Hotch began once he had finished his dinner. "Haley's parents texted me today. They want to take Jack to Disney World for a week in August."

Beth looked skeptical. "A whole week? Has he ever spent a whole week with them before?"

"No. And they've never taken him on a trip either. It makes me uneasy but I don't really have a reason to say no. They're fine grandparents to him. What should we do?"

"Honestly? I think we should ask Jack what he wants. If he's okay spending a whole week with them then we should let him go. If he doesn't want to then say you're only comfortable with him going for a shorter period of time."

"What if his dad isn't comfortable with him going away for a whole week?!"

"Well I'm not gonna lie, it'll probably suck. But something tells me we could find something to occupy our free time." Beth winked at him.

"I'll talk to Jack about it tomorrow when I get home from work and let them know. Let's go to bed, it's getting late."

Hotch stood up but Beth stayed on the couch, he stood in front of her with arms stretched out to help her up.

"There's just one thing I want to do first. You stay there."

Beth untucked his dress shirt and unbuttoned his pants and pulled down the zipper.

"Beth, what are you doing?!"

"Stand there and stay still, Hotchner."

She kissed the exposed skin above his briefs and slowly pulled them down kissing the skin that showed. Soon he was exposed and she was salivating. He wasn't quite ready yet but she wasted no time in taking him in her mouth.

"Beth," he sighed. She was warm and wet around him and he felt himself hardening in her mouth.

Slowly she backed off before engulfing him again. And again. It felt wrong that the gagging sounds she made when he hit the back of her throat turned him on but he kept his hands firmly grasped onto the sides of his pant legs, gripping the material for dear life. This was all her doing.

She eased off of him and reached up to smooth her hands over his. "Relax, Hotchner. Enjoy this." He released his pant legs on either side and she moved his hands to her shoulders before returning her focus to pleasuring him. She put her hands to better use playing with his balls and stroking the shaft while she toyed with the head in her mouth.

Beth could start to hear him inhale deeply and quickly as he neared the end so she abruptly pulled away and removed her hands.

"What the fu - why did you stop?"

"Just wanted to prolong the fun," she smirked at him. This time I'll let you finish. I promise.

She took him back into her mouth stifling her gag reflex as she pushed herself all the way down. She cupped his balls and massaged his perineum in the process. She bobbed her head up and down on him and drool poured out the sides of her mouth and down his dick. It provided lubrication for her fingers as she continued to rub him down below.

"Fuck. I'm close."

True to her word, Beth didn't ease up this time and soon she felt him explode in the back of her throat. She swallowed everything he had to offer before releasing him and pulling his briefs back up over him. She took his hands off her shoulders and used him as leverage to pull herself up from her sitting position on the couch.

"Now we can go to bed," she told him.

"I can't wait to marry you," he replied as he followed her to the bedroom.

July 18th, 2013 - 30 weeks pregnant

Hotch hadn't quite been at work much more than an hour when his cell phone buzzed next to him at his desk. It was from Beth.

*Call me when you have a free minute - nothing urgent :)*

He closed the report he had been working on and called her.

"Hey!" she answered.

"Hey, what's up?" They had just seen each other a couple hours before and it wasn't like her to just call to chat when he wasn't away on a case.

"So don't panic, everything's fine."

"What happened?" He interrupted her.

"I took a little bit of a stumble on my way into work. My dumb work heels and my offset center of gravity didn't agree with each other and I ended up on the ground. I didn't land on my belly but the midwife said I should go to the hospital for some monitoring so that's what I did."

"You're in the hospital?! I'm on my way."

"Aaron. It's okay, you don't have to come. They put me on the fetal monitor and they said the heart rate looks great. They just have to monitor me for four hours and then I can go back to work. Seriously Aaron, it's not a big deal, you should stay at work."

"Are you okay? Did you hurt yourself?" He was still worried and every part of him was telling him to go be with her.

"Just a couple of scrapes on my palms and knees from catching myself. They gave me some antibiotic cream and band aids."

"You're sure you and the baby are okay, you're not downplaying this?"

"Truly Aaron, we're fine. If something changes you'll be the first to know. I wasn't even going to come in but the midwife said better safe than sorry."

"Okay, well keep me updated. And let me know when you're discharged. Or if you change your mind and want me to come I will!"

"I know you will, Aaron. I love you.

"I love you too. Be safe, please. Go home and change your shoes before going into work."

"I will, I promise. Bye, babe."

"Bye."

Beth leaned back on the uncomfortable stretcher they had her in in the triage room. There wasn't a TV or even a door, just a curtain maintaining her privacy, but hopefully she wouldn't be there for much longer than four hours. She closed her eyes and listened to the fast and steady beat of her baby's heart.

"Dad's home!" Jack shouted as they heard the garage door opening. He was helping her slice veggies for stir-fry but abandoned his duties to run and give his dad a hug as he walked through the door.

"Hey, bud! How was your day?!"

"It was good, Aunt Jessie took me to her friends house and we swam in her pool and her friend had kids my age so it was super fun."

"That's awesome, Jack."

Hotch walked into the kitchen where Beth was still working on the stir-fry.

"How are you feeling?" He had been relieved when she had called to let him know they had both been cleared to leave the hospital but had still worried most of the day.

"I'm good, other than the stinging palms I feel fine."

Hotch kissed her before glancing at her hands and kissing those too. It did look painful.

"Jack, come sit with me. I want to talk to you about something."

Hotch took a seat at the island, across from where Beth was preparing dinner and he pulled the seat out next to him for Jack.

"So buddy, your grandparents want to take you on a trip next month. But before I tell them yes or no I wanted to see how you would feel about it."

"Where do they want to go?" Jack asked him.

"Well bud, they want to take you to Disney World for a whole week."

"I've always wanted to go to Disney!" Jack said excitedly. "Would you and Beth come?!"

"No Jack, your grandparents want this to be a special trip with just you and them."

"So I wouldn't see you or Beth the whole time?"

"No buddy, that's why I wanted to talk to you about it. If you want to go you should go but if you don't want to be gone a whole week you can tell me and I'll just say I'm not comfortable with you being gone that long."

"Do I still get to go to Disney if I don't go for a whole week?"

"I don't know, bud." Hotch answered honestly. "It's kind of a long trip so it would be hard to do it for only a few days. I think you will have a lot of fun if you go. Aunt Jessie will be there too and you can call Beth and I every night. But I only want you to go if _you_ want to go."

"I want to go but I'm worried I'll miss you."

Beth piped in. "We'll definitely miss you, Jack. And you'll probably miss us, but that doesn't mean you won't have fun."

Hotch nodded in agreement.

"I guess I want to go." Jack said, sounding a bit conflicted.

Hotch leaned over and kissed Jack's head. "I think it will make your grandparents really happy, bud."

"Alright, enough talk of Jack leaving. Let's eat!" Beth announced.

Later that evening Aaron climbed into bed next to Beth.

"Did you call Haley's parents?" She asked him.

"Yeah, they're going to take him from August 12-17th so not quite a whole week."

"That's good. How did the phone call go?"

"It was fine, we didn't talk about anything except Jack. I'm sure Jessie has told them about the baby but they didn't bring it up."

"Jack's excited to be a big brother, I'm sure he'll mention it. Do you think they'll be okay with it?"

"I'm sure they'll handle it appropriately. They love Jack and they've always been good to him, it's me they're not particularly fond of."

Beth just squeezed his thigh not knowing what to say to comfort him.

"It's okay, their disdain started ages ago. Around the time I joined the bureau and they decided they'd much rather their daughter be married to a lawyer than an FBI agent."

"I don't know, I've never seen a lawyer with that good of abs before."

Hotch chuckled and kissed her temple before running a hand over her belly.

"Promise me you'll stop wearing heels to work, at least until you're not pregnant. I don't want to get another call like the one I got this morning."

"I promise. Let's go to sleep, I'm exhausted."

Hotch turned off the bedside lamp and laid down in bed. Beth laid on her side next to him and he dozed off to the gentle kicks from her belly.


	13. Chapter 13

August 16th, 2013 - 34 weeks pregnant

Hotch drove home in a foul mood. Jack was at Disney and Beth had been home alone while he had chased an UnSub for 3 nights. The sick son of a bitch had left nearly a dozen bodies in his wake and the team had been dismissed by the police force when it became evident that the UnSub had moved on to a new city and they would have to sit and wait before pursuing him again. He turned the car off in the garage and took a few deep breaths trying to reset his attitude before entering the house. It didn't really work but he exited the car and went into the house anyway.

The house was spotless, clearly Beth had been productive during her nights alone. "Beth? I'm home."

"I'm in the nursery!"

Hotch climbed the stairs and met her in the nursery. Nearly everything was done and ready for the baby. The crib and dresser were assembled. There were sheets on the bed and a changing station ready on top of the dresser. A comfy rocking chair sat in the corner next to the book shelf and framed paintings of animals hung on the wall. It was perfect and now all it needed was the baby. Beth was standing near the closet hanging impossibly small onesies onto hangers before hanging them up.

"Can you believe we're going to have something so tiny that they will actually fit into this thing?" She held up a small onesie with little elephants on it.

Hotch didn't respond; just walked up behind and wrapped his arms across her and pulled her tight against his chest. He let one arm travel down to rest on her belly and she brought her hands up to clutch the arm still across her chest.

"Are you okay? You were gone a while on the case."

Hotch kissed her temple and released her. "I'll be okay." Beth turned to face him.

"With this being the last night before Jack comes home I thought we could make it special. I booked us a room at the Mandrain Oriental in DC. I thought we could have a nice dinner in the city and relax, but if you'd rather stay here and decompress I'd totally understand."

"No, that sounds really nice. Let's do it."

Beth smiled at him. "Well we can check into the room anytime since it's after 3PM. I'll make us a reservation for a restaurant in the hotel unless you'd prefer somewhere else?"

"That sounds perfect. I'm going to shower and then I'll be ready to go." He kissed her and walked towards their bedroom to shower. In all honesty he didn't really feel like going out. He wanted to order Chinese food and lay on the couch drinking beer before sleeping in until it was time to pick Jack up. But Beth had clearly put thought into this and soon they would have two kids to take care of so who knows when the next time they'd have this opportunity would be?

They took the train into DC and walked to their hotel, it was a hot day and being nearly 9 months pregnant Beth was exhausted and sweating by the time they got to their hotel despite it being less than a half of a mile walk from the train stop.

"Oh my god, we need to start going on runs together once this baby is out. I'm so out of shape."

Hotch laughed and moved a piece of hair that was stuck to her face with sweat. "You're not out of shape, it's nearly 100 degrees outside and you're incubating a whole other human."

"Regardless, we're training for something once this little babe makes their appearance. Will you check us in? I'm going to grab a drink of water, I put the room under your name."

Hotch nodded and went to the front desk to get their room key. They had less than an hour before their dinner reservation but Beth wanted to freshen up in the room before heading back down to the restaurant.

Hotch laid on the king sized bed in their room while Beth claimed the bathroom to apply makeup and fix her hair. The bed was impossibly comfy and despite his hunger Hotch didn't feel like leaving it.

"Ready?" Beth asked as she exited the bathroom. She looked amazing. Her hair was pulled back into a low loose bun with some curls escaping to frame her face. She was wearing the same light pink floral dress she wore to her baby shower and it looked beautiful on her.

"You look amazing." He told her and got off the bed.

"Thank you," she kissed him softly before taking his hand. "I'm starving! I was looking at the menu while you showered and everything sounds amazing!"

"Well we might just have to try it all, then."

"Baby and I think that's a great idea."

They got to the restaurant and truly everything did look delicious. Hotch ordered a drink and they shared appetizers. Hotch ordered steak and Beth ordered salmon and they stole bites of each other's meal. They talked for a long while about Jack and the new baby, their jobs, just enjoying each other's company. By the time they were sharing an order of the carrot cake it was late into the evening and Beth heard a voice next to her.

"Beth? Beth Clemmons?"

Beth looked up and saw a familiar face. "Oh my gosh, Derek! How are you?!" Beth stood up to give the man a hug.

"Wow!" He said, noticing her belly for the first time. "Look at you!"

"I know, crazy right?! Derek, this is my fiancee Aaron Hotchner. Aaron, this is Derek. He's an old friend."

Aaron stood up and shook the man's hand.

"Well Aaron, you're a lucky man for snagging up this one. Congratulations."

Aaron gave a brief nod and just said thank you.

"It was good to see you, Beth! We should catch up one of these days, it seems like a lot is new with you!"

"Yeah, good to see you Derek!"

Derek walked away and Beth sat back down at the table to take another bite of carrot cake.

"You used to have sex with him, didn't you?" Aaron asked her point blank. He didn't seem like he was kidding.

"What?! What makes you say that?"

"Just answer the damn question." He was clearly annoyed and Beth couldn't figure out why.

"Yeah, we used to see each other on and off. What's the big deal?"

"The big deal is that you're clearly still friendly with a man that you had sex with! He still finds you attractive."

"Aaron, it's not like we chat. We'd get together when we were both single to have a good time. That's it. He didn't even know I was pregnant!"

"That's even worse!" Hotch argued. "He's clearly at home waiting for your next phone call with no idea that you're pregnant and engaged."

"Aaron this is ridiculous, he's not at home pining for me. He has a life. Honestly, move on."

"How many other fuck buddies do you have roaming around the DC area?"

"Seriously Aaron, that's what we're gonna do right now? Slut shame me?"

"I just want to be prepared. One down, how many more can we potentially run into? Five? Ten? Exactly how many men have you slept with?"

"Fuck you, Aaron."

Beth got up from the table and walked out and Hotch flagged down the waiter to get the check. He sighed. He knew he was being irrational and wrong but his frustration and exhaustion was making it hard to think clearly. They had never fought like this, was this even a fight? Mostly it was just him being an ass. He sat there by himself, trying to figure out what to say to his pregnant partner, that would make her forgive him. After 5 minutes he was still coming up empty so he got up and went up to the room without a plan.

He exited the elevator and Beth was standing outside their hotel room door, she had clearly been crying. Her eyes were red and black mascara was smudged down her face. He briefly wondered why she was waiting outside and then he remembered. Shit he had the only room key in his wallet.

Beth didn't look at him as he pulled the room key out and unlocked the door. He pushed the door open for her and she went straight to the bathroom turning on the shower. He felt like the world's biggest douche bag. After a few minutes the shower went off and he just heard the occasional sniffle.

He knocked on the door gently. "Beth? Beth, please open the door. I'm so sorry."

Beth opened up the door and walked past him. She had removed her makeup and had changed into the clothes she was wearing before dinner.

"I want to go home." She told him.

"Beth, it's late. I'm sorry, let's just stay here and we can go home in the morning, okay?"

"Aaron, I'm not sleeping in the same room as you, let alone the same bed. So I'm going to go home. You can stay here if you want."

Hotch realized there was no point in arguing with her and he sure wasn't going to let her go by herself at this time of night.

"Okay, give me a minute and I'll be ready to go."

Hotch gathered up what little he had taken out of their bag, used the bathroom, and was ready to leave. He left the room keys on the bed and they headed out. Beth didn't say anything to him as they walked to the train station. It was after 11PM and the night had cooled to a much more comfortable temperature. They got on the train and Beth sat down rubbing her belly and Hotch sat next to her. As they got farther out of DC less and less people were on the train and soon he and Beth were the only ones in the train car. Only a few exits before their stop a scrawny man got on the train. He was wearing a beanie over his greasy blond hair and his clothes were basically falling off of his skinny body. He couldn't have been much past 20 years old. He looked around the train and Hotch made eye contact with him. The kid quickly looked away. Hotch noticed the kid glancing over towards them every so often and he was making Hotch extremely uneasy.

"Switch seats with me." Hotch told Beth. The first thing he had said to her since they left the hotel room.

"What?" Beth sounded annoyed and confused.

"Switch seats with me." He said again trying to emphasize the urgency in his whispered voice. Hotch got up and Beth shifted over to his seat closer to the door, putting Hotch in between Beth and the kid who had been trying to subtly move closer to them. They were nearing a stop and as the train slowed the boy pulled out a knife at them.

"Give me your purse and your wallet and nothing bad has to happen."

Beth looked over at Hotch terrified. Hotch put up his hands signalling he would comply before slowly reaching into his back pocket for his wallet. The kid looked scared. Hotch could tell he was inexperienced and nervous. The knife was barely larger than a pocket knife, he had encountered worse and he had the scars to prove it.

As he was reaching for his wallet the boy looked to Beth.

"Your purse, lady! Hurry up."

Hotch took advantage of his momentary focus on Beth and quickly grabbed the wrist that was holding the knife. He stood and wrenched the kids arm behind his back effectively immobilizing him.

"Drop the knife." Hotch used his most menacing FBI tone on him and it worked. The kid dropped the knife and it clattered onto the floor of the train.

"Beth, hit the emergency button."

Beth scrambled to her feet and hit the big red button alerting the staff of the problem. They were nearly at a complete stop and soon there was a commotion around them of passengers in other cars, passengers at the train stop, and workers. The cops were called and soon he was being put into the back of a police car. Hotch spoke with the police and gave them their recount of the story - it took longer than it should have been Hotch knew this was the protocol. Ask every question at least twice, get all the facts. It was after midnight by the time they were allowed to go home and Hotch felt dead on his feet.

"We've called you a taxi to take you home. We'll be in contact if we have any further questions for you."

Hotch nodded at the officer. "Thank you."

For the first time since the incident at the restaurant Hotch looked Beth in the eye. "Are you okay?"

She burst into tears and reached out to pull him into a hug. He rubbed her back as her tears soaked through his shirt. "Hey, it's okay. We're okay."

He encountered so much trauma and danger at his job that a kid with a knife barely phased him but seeing a knife being held in the direction of Beth had him terrified and furious. He continued to hold and comfort her until their cab arrived and he held the door open for her. The ride back to their car was quiet but for a different reason than before and Beth kept a tight hold onto his hand. The cab dropped them off at their car and Hotch drove them home, he unlocked the door for them to enter into the house.

Beth, about before. I'm really sorry, I didn't mean any of it. I was just-"

Beth shook her head and cut him off. "We can talk about it tomorrow. All I want to do is go to bed next to my big strong FBI agent who makes me feel safe."

Hotch nodded and took her hand and led her to their bedroom. They changed into PJ's and climbed into bed. Beth turned onto her side facing away from him and Aaron figured she didn't want to be touched right now so he laid on his side of the bed.

"Will you hold me?" she asked him softly.

Hotch moved himself next to her and curled his body around hers draping a hand over her belly. He kissed her shoulder blade and soon they were both fast asleep.


	14. Chapter 14

Author's Note: I just realized I named Beth's former fling after Morgan… not intentional. My bad, ya'll. Also as I've reread I've noticed a few small inconsistencies with the story and I apologize for that. Try not to take anything too seriously :) ALSO if you're reading & enjoying this story please take them time to favorite/follow/review! It would seriously make my day and make writing this story so much more fun. I'm currently a nurse working the frontlines of the pandemic and this story is my only escape from reality!

August 17th, 2013 - 34 weeks pregnant

Hotch awoke and the bed was empty next to him, he glanced at the alarm clock on the bedside table and saw it was nearly 9:30 in the morning. He couldn't remember the last time he had slept in that late. He did however, remember the terrible things he had said to his fiancée the night before and he instantly dreaded getting out of bed. He lost his cool so rarely in life - but it always seemed to be with those he loved the most. He climbed out of bed and headed down the hallway; glancing into the nursery he saw Beth sitting in the rocking chair, flipping through a baby name book.

Hotch knocked on the door frame. "Hey."

Beth looked up from the book. "Hey."

Hotch began to form an apology but before he got words out Beth spoke again.

"Before you talk I want to say something."

Hotch nodded.

"I was 19 when I lost my virginity. And I was 35 when I met you. For 16 years I was sexaully active with men who weren't you and I'm not going to apologize for that. But Aaron, I've always been monogamous. I know the list of people I've slept with is longer than the people you've slept with, and I'm sorry that it makes you uncomfortable. But all that should matter is the list of people I'm currently sleeping with, and will sleep with in the future. And Aaron, that list is only you."

"It doesn't make me uncomfortable. Truly, it doesn't. What I said to you last night was hurtful and wrong and doesn't reflect at all how I actually feel about you. I had a horrible few days and that's not an excuse, it's not. I was in a bad place and being introduced to Derek, normally it would have been no big deal, because it _was_ no big deal. But in the moment all I felt was rage and jealousy that he had seen what I had seen, that he had laid where I had laid, and irrationally I let that consume me. It doesn't bother me that you've had sex with other men, and I don't need to know how many men there were over the 16 years. What I do know is that I love and respect you more than anyone, and I'm so sorry that last night I didn't act like it.

Beth got up from her spot on the rocking chair and walked to Hotch who still stood in the doorway. She took her hands in his.

"I forgive you. But you need to be better about telling me what you need, Hotchner. This relationship isn't just about me. If I have something planned for us, especially if it's something that I planned without consulting you, and you're having a bad day and just want to stay at home then please tell me. You're amazing at your job and you always seem to know what I need without me having to tell you, but I don't have your skills. I need you to talk to me."

"That's fair. And honestly, Beth. You know what I need better than I know what I need, 98% of the time. But last night I knew I wasn't in a good place and I should have told you that. I'm sorry I ruined our last night together before Jack comes home."

"Eh, it's okay. We'll have another night alone in like 18 years, right?!"

Hotch laughed. "That sounds about right. How are you doing with what happened on the subway?"

"Well I was terrified, and then I started thinking about how that's just a minor encounter compared to what you run into at work and then I was even more terrified about you ever going out into the field again."

"Trust me, with you there with me I was significantly more terrified than I usually am at work. At work I can maintain a clear head but with everything that happened last night I... " Hotch faded off. "I'm just really glad that you're okay."

"I'm just fine, thanks to you."

Beth reached up and cupped his face lightly before kissing him softly.

"You know," Hotch said. "We have a bit of time before we have to pick Jack up from the airport. We could make up for last night."

"Mm no can do. I forgive you, but you still have to pay for your crimes." Beth patted his shoulder before walking out of the room.

Hotch just rolled his eyes and chuckled before following her down the stairs and into the kitchen where she began to make them some scrambled eggs.

"I talked to Jack this morning, before you woke up." Beth told him.

"Oh yeah, how's he doing?"

With his work schedule Hotch hadn't been able to talk with Jack as much as he would have liked while he was at Disney but at least him or Beth had talked to him once if not twice a day.

"He's excited to come home and tell us all about his favorite rides. I think he's starting to get a little homesick so he was happy that we're meeting them at the airport."

"We should leave here by 11 to get to the airport on time."

"Sounds good, I'm ready to see him. Is there anything I should know before I meet Haley's parents?"

"No, it will probably be a very brief interaction. They aren't too fond of small talk."

Beth served up the eggs on two plates and passed one to Hotch.

"Well all that matters is that Jack had a good time."

Hotch agreed and they sat to eat their breakfast.

"Goodness," Beth said with surprise. "I'm not sure how they have room but I swear to god this baby is doing somersaults in there. Feel this."

Hotch put his hand over her belly and sure enough there was a whirlwind of activity underneath his hand.

"I can't believe in 6 weeks we're going to have a newborn," Hotch said.

"Can we hope for like, 5 weeks? Thirty-nine weeks seems good enough. Not sure how much more I can take of this baby using my bladder as a trampoline."

Hotch smiled at her. "You've been a trooper, you're already so patient with this baby. Just don't deliver before 37 weeks because I'd appreciate it if I wasn't away on a case when you go into labor."

"Zero chance I let this baby exit my body without you there to hold my hand."

"Good deal," Hotch stood and gave her belly a final rub. "I'm gonna hop in the shower."

"Can I join you?"

"I thought I had to pay for my crimes?"

"Not for sex! I need help shaving my legs." Beth laughed.

Hotch just laughed and shook his head. "C'mon then."

Later that day Hotch and Beth stood hand in hand outside baggage claim as they waited for Jack. They were both eagerly awaiting to see Jack again.

"There he is." Hotch said to her as he saw Jack coming with his suitcase trailing behind him.

"Dad!" Jack yelled with excitement when he saw Hotch and Beth waving at him. He ran towards them and they met him in the middle. Hotch crouched down to give him a big hug.

"It's so good to see you, buddy! We missed you!" Hotch said to him.

"I missed you guys too!" Jack let go of his dad to hug Beth as well. Beth kissed his head.

"Welcome back, bud. It's so good to see you."

At this point Haley's parents had caught up with Jack, Hotch stood back up to greet them.

"Thank you for taking good care of Jack, I know he had a great time."

"He's a wonderful boy, we love having him around." Grace said. She turned to Beth and extended a hand. "My name is Grace Brooks, this is my husband Roger. It's nice to meet you."

Beth took her hand and shook it. "Beth Clemmons, it's nice to meet you both."

"We'd like to see more of Jack, if that'd be possible?" Roger asked.

"Yeah, of course. Uh, you're always welcome at his soccer games. Or if you want to have him overnight sometimes just let me know."

"Thanks." Roger said. "We'll keep in touch."

"Good luck with the new baby," Grace said to Beth.

"Thank you."

"Jack, say goodbye to your grandparents," Hotch told Jack.

He gave them both hugs goodbye and Hotch grabbed his bag before they walked back to the car. Jack chatted their ears off the whole drive home recounting his favorite rides, his favorite characters, all the delicious food they ate.

"We're so glad you had a good time, Jack!" Beth said to him from the front seat.

"I think your grandparents want to spend more time with you, is that okay with you?"

"I missed you guys a lot, I don't know if I want to be gone for that long again."

"It wouldn't be for a whole week every time. Just maybe some soccer games or dinners." Hotch explained to him. "Now that you don't spend as much time with Aunt Jessie I think they just want to make sure they still get to see you."

"Yeah that'd be cool. Next time I want you guys to come to Disney too, we could bring the new baby."

"Well we should probably wait until the baby is old enough to go on some of the rides but I think it'd be fun if the four of us all went to Disney together. I've never been before!" Beth said.

"You'd really like it, Beth. It's like Legoland but even cooler!"

"Sounds fun! What should we make for your first dinner back at home?"

"Pizza!" Jack yelled.

Beth laughed. "Sounds like a good plan, once we get home I'll go to the store and get the stuff to make homemade pizza."

At home Jack and Hotch practiced soccer in the backyard while Beth went shopping. Later in the evening they all made their own personal pizzas to eat for dinner. Jack kept remembering little details of his trip to tell them about and shortly after dinner he fell asleep on the couch while Hotch read him the last Harry Potter book.

"Poor kid's exhausted, good call on doing PJ's and brushing teeth before reading." Beth said as she sat down on the couch next to Jack's feet. His head lay sleeping on his dad's leg.

Hotch ran his hand through his son's soft hair. "Something tells me our next family trip should be to Universal Studios, not Disney. He's already dreading being done reading Harry Potter."

"That kid might die of excitement if we take him to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. I'd love it if we could do that for him."

Hotch eased Jack's head off his leg and rested it on the couch so he could stand up before picking Jack up into his arms. Jack groaned in disagreement at being moved but didn't open his eyes. Beth stood to give him a kiss goodnight on his forehead before Hotch carried him upstairs to his bedroom.

Beth stretched out on the couch and waited for Hotch to get back. When he came back downstairs he put a Fleetwood Mac record on and held out his hand to Beth.

"Dance with me?"

Beth took his hand and pulled herself off the couch. A task that was getting harder and harder as she neared the end of her pregnancy. Hotch pulled her as close as he could while Landslide played throughout the living room.

"We don't fit together as well as we used to," Beth remarked looking down at her belly in between them.

Hotch spun her 180 degrees so that her back was against his chest and he placed his hands on her belly while they continued to sway to the music.

"Feels perfect to me," he told her. Hotch swept her hair to one side and started kissing the exposed skin of her neck.

"Aaron," Beth moaned.

"Do you want me to stop?" He asked her with his lips still grazing her neck.

"No," she breathed.

He slid his hand to the hem of her dress before pulling it back up with his hands. He rubbed her through her undies before slipping his fingers inside and meeting her velvety skin. He circled his finger around her clit while sucking on her neck and Beth started to feel a bit weak in the knees as they remained standing in the middle of the living room. She leaned into him and was impressed he was managing to keep them both upright while his fingers remained busy under her dress.

"Does that feel good, baby?" He breathed in her ear.

Beth just slowly nodded her head feeling too dazed to coherently answer him. Slowly he sunk a finger into her and Beth moaned. He moved in and out a few times before adding a second finger. He moved those two fingers in and out a few times before removing them all together and focusing on her clit again. She wouldn't last much longer if he kept it up.

"Aaron, harder." She moaned.

Suddenly his phone rang, loudly, from where he left it on the couch and Hotch's fingers froze.

"Don't you dare!" Beth complained as he began to remove his hand from her panties.

"Beth, it's probably work. I have to."

"What the fuck." Beth muttered to herself more than anybody.

"Hotchner." Aaron answered the phone as if he had simply been working on a puzzle when he received the phone call but Beth could see the straining of his pants. She really really _really _hoped JJ was simply setting up a playdate for Henry and Jack and not calling him into work on a Saturday night.

"Okay. I'll be in soon." He said as he ended the call.

"Fuck." Beth said to him.

"I'm sorry. I really have to go."

Hotch cupped her face and kissed her cheek before running upstairs to change and freshen up before heading out the door 10 minutes later.

Beth dragged herself upstairs and let her vibrator finish the job that Hotch had started but even that left her feeling unsatisfied. She decided to just hop in the shower and go to bed. She checked her phone one last time before settling in for the night and a notification popped up.

*AMBER ALERT*

A seven year old girl had gone missing from her bedroom - suspected abduction. She looked at the sweet girl's face and sighed. It terrified her that the safest place for her baby was right where she was at - inside of her. And soon she would have no choice but to bring that baby into this world of unknowns and try and shelter them from all the dangers. She shut off the phone; worrying for Hotch who would be up for god knows how long looking for this poor child. Beth went downstairs and double checked that all the doors in the house were locked before checking on Jack one last time. He was still sound asleep in his bed. Beth laid down and eventually fell asleep in the empty bed.

Beth awoke to the sound of the faucet in the bathroom. She glanced at the alarm clock - it wasn't quite 5AM. The door to the bathroom was closed but she saw Hotch's work bag on the floor of the bedroom. The door opened and he walked out in his pajamas and got into bed next to her.

"Did you find her alive?" Beth asked softly.

Hotch just shook his head. Beth laid her head on his chest and they both found what little rest they could.


	15. Chapter 15

August 30th, 2013 - 36 weeks pregnant

It seemed like it was happening in slow motion as Beth watched. Hotch shot the soccer ball towards the goal and it slipped through Jack's fingers nailing him square in the face. The red stream of blood started pouring down his face instantly and she could tell his eyes were welling with tears that he was trying desperately to not let fall. They were hosting a Labor Day weekend BBQ and JJ, Will, Henry, Morgan, Hotch, Emily and Rossi were all playing while she, Reid and Garcia cheered from the sidelines.

Hotch rushed to Jack's side. "Buddy, I'm so sorry." Hotch looked miserable and Beth knew he felt terribly guilty despite it being an accident.

Beth stood up as Jack and Aaron reached the porch. "I'll take him," she said to Hotch. "C'mon, bud." She took Jack's hand and led him into the house as he used his shirt to soak up the blood still coming from his nose.

She helped him onto the kitchen counter and gave him a washcloth to use to soak up the blood and carefully pulled his t-shirt over his head. She put some crushed ice into a ziplock bag and wrapped it in a towel before gently placing it over the bridge of his nose. Jack remained silent but she could see tears were starting to escape from the corner of his eyes. She just stroked his hair and held the ice while he still held the washcloth. After a few minutes he cautiously removed the washcloth and it seemed that his nose had stopped bleeding - although a bruise was beginning to form.

"You hold the ice. I'm going to get you some tylenol and a clean shirt." Jack nodded at her and she headed upstairs. When she came back down she dampened a paper towel and cleaned the dried blood off of his face before helping him into a new shirt and giving him the tylenol.

"How do you feel?" She asked him.

He just shrugged at her. "It kinda hurts."

"It looked like it hurt a lot. We'll keep doing ice and tylenol and that will help. You'll have quite the bruise to show off on the first day of school. You know, bud. When something hurts you - it's okay to cry. No matter how you're feeling - it's always okay to cry."

"Dad never cries, even when he's hurt."

"Dad cries. I know it's hard to believe, and it doesn't happen very often, but he does. And that's okay. No matter who you are or how old you are - it's okay. C'mere, bud."

She pulled him in for a hug. He sat on the kitchen counter, his arms stretched around her neck and his head resting against her chest. She wrapped her arms around him and pulled him close to her. After a moment he let go and he placed his hands on her nearly full term belly.

"When the baby gets here they're going to call you mom, right?"

"Well he or she won't be able to talk for a while, but when they can, yeah. They'll call me mom."

"And this baby, they're going to be my brother or sister, right?"

"Of course, Jack."

"Well I was thinking. If this baby is my brother or sister, and they call you mom, shouldn't I call you mom too?"

Beth smiled and kissed his head. "You can call me whatever you want, Jack. Do you want to call me mom?"

Jack nodded his head yes. Beth pulled him in for another hug. "Mom it is, then."

The sliding glass door leading to the back patio opened and Hotch walked in still looking terribly guilty. He walked into the kitchen and rubbed Jack's back as he hugged Beth.

"Are you okay buddy, I'm so sorry."

Jack released Beth and looked at his Dad. "It's okay, dad. It was an accident."

Hotch lifted the boy off the counter and into his arms hugging him. "Well I'm still really sorry, Jack. I never want to do anything that hurts you."

"I know, dad. Can I go back outside?"

"Sure, buddy. Maybe no more soccer tonight, though?" Hotch let him down and Jack ran back outside.

Hotch watched as he ran back over to Henry.

"Hey," Beth said to him and he turned to face her. She cupped his face. "It was an accident. Forgive yourself."

Hotch just gave her a small smile before taking her hand and leading them both back outside. Hotch started grilling everyone's hamburgers and the rest of the evening passed without incident. The team ate and talked and laughed.

"So how are you feeling?" JJ asked her. "You've got to be exhausted - I remember getting to nine months and feeling like I was dying after half a flight of stairs."

Beth laughed. "As much as I'm ready to be done I can't help but feel like this pregnancy flew by. But I'm definitely not going to miss getting winded just from going up the stairs to our bedroom."

JJ glanced around the patio and noticed that everyone was involved in their own conversations, no one was paying them any attention.

"I remember sex just seemed like so much work. Will kept trying to tell me that we wouldn't be able to postpartum so we should take advantage of our last baby free days but god. Everything aches and it's just so uncomfortable."

"YES! I mean I feel bad and Aaron really has been so good about everything but earlier this week we had to change positions half-way through because I was so uncomfortable. I felt so bad and he hasn't tried to initiate anything since."

"Girl, don't feel bad. You're growing and carrying a whole human. Sex can take a back seat for a while."

"How was postpartum for you, if you don't mind me asking?"

"It was an adjustment. I was used to being active and suddenly it hurt to sit down and I had a baby attached to my nipple every 2 hours. The first couple weeks are rough but slowly you'll find your new normal, and don't be afraid to ask for help."

Beth reached over and squeezed JJ's hand.

"Thanks, JJ. To be honest it's all kind of terrifying."

JJ laughed. "Yeah that feeling of terror in your gut, that never really goes away. You just learn to live with it."

"Oh great," Beth laughed with her. "Do you want another glass of wine?"

JJ checked her watch. "Well… technically it's Henry's bedtime soon but it's a holiday weekend so sure!"

"Penelope! Em!" Beth shouted to the other girls. "More wine?"

They both nodded enthusiastically. They all ended up in the kitchen with her to help her with the wine glasses.

"How's our little sugar plum baby doing in there?!" Garcia asked her enthusiastically while putting her hands on Beth's belly.

"Oh you know, kicking and growing, growing and kicking. You going to survive these next few weeks with Hotch at Quantico while we wait for the little babe?"

"Don't worry yourself sweet butterfly, a few weeks with the G-Man isn't enough to scare me off."

Emily just laughed and shook her head at Garcia. "It's going to be weird not having Hotch in the field!"

"Well I'm grateful you guys are willing to give him up for a bit." Beth told them.

"I think we can all agree this is way more important," JJ said and the others nodded their head in agreement.

"Have you guys thought of any names?" Emily asked her.

"I think we're pretty set on our girl name, well the first name at least. Boys' names are still really up in the air. I think Aaron wants to see the baby before we really make up our mind."

"Aw he's such a good dad, I can't wait to see him with a new little baby." Penelope gushed.

"I think he's nervous about me going into labor. He's not exactly the greatest with things that are out of his control."

"Not to mention Hotch is the type who prefers to bear pain himself rather than watch others suffer." Emily said.

"Very true. One hundred percent planning an epidural though so hopefully it won't be too bad!" Beth laughed.

The girls continued to laugh and chat when the door opened and Will came into the house carrying a crying Henry.

"Aaaaand that's my cue that it's time to leave. Love you ladies." JJ gave everyone a hug before taking Henry from Will and calming him down in her arms.

Slowly but surely their other guests gave hugs and said their goodbyes as well until Hotch, Beth, and Jack were alone in the house once again.

"Alright bud, brush teeth and get pajamas on. It's getting late."

They worked on cleaning up the kitchen before heading upstairs themselves to say goodnight to Jack. They tucked him in and kissed his head and were about to shut the door when Jack spoke up from under the covers.

"Night, Mom. Night, Dad. Love you."

Hotch smiled and shut the door behind them. He looked at Beth.

"Mom?' He asked her questioningly but seemingly pleased.

"Yeah, he decided that since the new baby will call me mom that he wants to call me mom too. Are you okay with that?"

"Of course! That makes me really happy." He told her before kissing her gently.

"Want to take a bath with me?" She asked him.

Hotch nodded yes and they made their way into the master bathroom. Beth busied herself adding epsom salts and relaxing oils into the water before standing up and removing her shirt. She got goosebumps as the cool A/C hit her exposed skin. Hotch stood in front of her and ran his hands down her arms before placing them both on her belly.

"I can't believe that this little one is supposed to come next month. I thought if I ever had a second kid I would feel more prepared. But I don't, I still feel wildly underqualified."

"You had a sucky dad. All you grew up learning was what not to do. But my dad, he was wonderful. He played with us but knew when to scold us, he taught us how to ride our bikes and change a tire. I know what a good dad looks like and you're it, Hotchner. I couldn't have picked a better man to raise kids with."

Hotch hugged her and she slipped her hands under his t-shirt and pulled it over his head.

"C'mon, the water is gonna get cold." He held her hand to help her balance as she stepped out of her shorts and into the large clawfoot tub. She leaned forward as he shed the rest of his clothing and got in behind her. Beth settled herself against his chest and he wrapped his arms around her finding a comfortable spot on her belly to rest, the silky water settled around them. They relaxed for several minutes before Beth finally broke the silence.

"Do you remember the first time we had sex?"

"Yeah," Hotch answered. "I was scared shitless."

"Well you really made me work for it, I was starting to get worried that there was something physically wrong with you!"

"Three months is not that long!" Hotch defended himself. "I wanted to be respectful."

Beth giggled and Hotch couldn't help but smile when he heard it. Her laugh was everything to him.

"I felt very respected. And very very horny." She laughed again.

"What made you think of that night?" He asked her.

"I was just remembering it fondly, that was the night I knew our relationship was going to be something more than just a fling. I knew you were different than the men I had dated in the past."

"For me it was when you met Jack and the team and just took all of it in stride. I knew if 6 profilers and my son couldn't scare you off then nothing would."

"That was like a month before you finally decided to take me up on my offer to come inside after our date, if you know you liked me that much why didn't we sleep together sooner?"

"Just because I felt that way didn't mean I could assume you felt that way! Besides it was kind of terrifying. With Haley we lost our virginities to each other - we were equally clueless. With you I knew you were going in with significantly more experience than I was."

She tilted her head against his chest to look up at him. "Aw that's a nice way of calling your pregnant fiancee a slut."

She smiled at him so he would know she was joking.

"Hey, I'm not complaining about your experience. You rocked my world that night, I've never looked back."

Beth laughed loudly. "You were pretty damn good yourself, Hotchner."

Hotch ran a hand up her bare skin and settled it in her thick hair. "Mm, I think we're a pretty good match," he said to her before pulling her hair, gently forcing her head to the side.

He kissed her neck a few times before settling in on a spot he knew she was sensitive at and started lightly sucking. Beth reached an arm back and placed her hand on the nape of his neck holding him in place.

"Aaron, that feels so good."

"We don't have to do anything tonight if you're not up for it," he murmured into her skin.

"I want to. I always want to. My body has just been making the logistics of it difficult lately."

"Let's get out of the tub, if it works out; great. If not; oh well. It's not the end of the world."

Hotch helped her out of the tub and wrapped her in a towel before grabbing one for himself. She dried herself off as best as she could before dropping the towel and wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him into a kiss. She slipped her tongue into his mouth before latching onto his bottom lip and sucking. He reciprocated enthusiastically and she could feel him hardening against her thigh, she was feeling determined to make sex work tonight but she knew standing wasn't the way to go. Her center of gravity was off and her feet would get puffy if she stood for too long.

"C'mon I have an idea," she told him, breaking off the kiss.

She led him back into the bedroom and she grabbed a pillow off the bed and placed it near the edge. Beth sat on the pillow before wrapping her legs around Hotch's waist and laying down. This position allowed her to relax on the bed but gave him easy access while he stood and did all the work.

Hotch kneeled to the floor and rested her legs on top of his shoulders. He kissed the inside of her thighs gently before reaching her clit. He gave it a few licks and kisses and noted that she was more than ready for him.

"Aaron," she groaned. "I want you inside of me."

He stood and she re-wrapped her legs around his waist as he sunk into her moaning loudly. Beth thoroughly enjoyed herself as they once again proved they were a good match.


	16. Chapter 16

September 16th, 2013 - 39 weeks pregnant

"Do you feel comfortable with the signs of labor and when to come to the hospital?"

"Sure do."

"Do you have any other questions for me today?" The midwife asked her. Beth thought for a second but came up empty handed.

"I don't think so!"

"Okay, well you and baby look great. Labor could come on at any time but we're not in a rush. Drink lots of water and try to keep stress to a minimum during this next week, okay? Schedule your 40 week appointment at the desk, if you deliver before then it will cancel automatically."

"Perfect, thank you so much!"

Beth walked to her car and texted Hotch the recording she took of their baby's heartbeat.

*Everything looks good with the babe. What do you think about tacos for dinner tonight?*

She waited before driving off to see if he would reply. It had been hard for Hotch to let the team jet off to different cities while he remained at Quantico but as far as she knew everyone was home right now - he should just be working on paperwork.

After a few minutes it became obvious that she wouldn't get an immediate reply so she drove back home to finish her work day from there.

Hotch was listening to the heartbeat in the text that Beth had sent him when JJ came into his office with a familiar sense of urgency.

"Active shooter situation at the local Walmart, they want us on scene for crisis negotiation."

Hotch immediately stood up and put his phone in his pocket.

"Let's go."

They arrived on scene and it was a madhouse. Media was everywhere, cops, ambulances, fire trucks with sirens blaring. Hundreds of shoppers and workers that had made it out safely were crying and some just looked stunned. Hotch assessed his surroundings and made a plan.

"JJ and Morgan; I want you guys interviewing the people who got out. See what we can figure out about the guy in there.

Emily, talk with the employees. See if anyone recognized him as a regular customer or if there was anything unusual about work that day.

Reid; get the blueprints and figure out every way in/out of the store then go over security footage with Garcia and see what we can learn.

Rossi and I will be the main communicators with the inside." Hotch gave everyone their responsibilities and they dispersed.

"Have we had any communication with anyone on the inside?" Hotch asked the police sheriff running the scene.

"Not yet - we have an unknown number of hostages but it has to be at least a dozen. At least 3 wounded if not more."

"We have to start a line of communication. Figure out what this guy wants before even more people get shot."

Hotch got on the megaphone and shouted as loudly as he could so that the shooter would hear him.

"Our number is 555-555-0707. Call with your demands."

Just a minute later the phone in front of Hotch and Rossi started ringing. Hotch answered.

"Hello this is Agent Aaron Hotchner, who am I speaking to?"

Hotch heard sniffling on the other end.

"Uhm my, my name is Ellie.

"How old are you Ellie?"

"I'm 10."

"Okay Ellie, you're being so brave and I'm so proud of you. Are you hurt, Ellie?"

"No," the young girl still sounded like she was on the verge of sobbing at any moment.

"Is anyone around you hurt?"

"Yeah, some people are bleeding."

"Okay Ellie, are you with the bad man with the gun?"

"Yeah." Ellie started to cry.

"Okay Ellie, okay. Will you tell him I want to talk to him?

Hotch heard the little girl talk to the man and soon there was a new voice on the line.

"What?"

"This is Agent Aaron Hotchner, what is your name?"

"I'm not telling you my name, do you think I'm an idiot?" The man on the other end of the phone asked him.

"No, I don't. What do you want in exchange for the injured hostages and the children?"

"I don't want anything except for everyone to leave me alone!" He yelled into the phone.

"You know we can't do that. But we're willing to negotiate."

"Fine. If I'm getting rid of the injured and the children then I want to replace my hostages with something equally as valuable. If you come in unarmed I'll let the kids and the cripples go."

"Deal." Hotch said as Rossi furiously shook his head no.

"Bring your badge so I know it's you."

Hotch hung up the phone.

"Aaron you have to be joking, there's no way you're going in there."

Reid ran up to them. "Garcia and I reviewed the security cameras and we figured some stuff out. We ID'd him as Austin Green, Garcia is digging up dirt on him now. He came into the store but immediately went to the back, where the electronics and photo center is. He hid the gun in his shopping cart under a giant winter coat. He talked to the people working the electronics counter for only a few seconds before he grabbed the gun and started shooting. Both the employees at the counter were shot as well as four other customers making it 6 total. Since he was in a back corner of the store most people were able to escape but he has 18 total hostages including the 6 injured and 3 children."

"Good work, Reid. Keep working on motive, I'm going in." Hotch told him as he removed the guns from the holsters at his hip and ankle.

"What?!" Reid yelled in his distinctive high pitched shriek. But it was too late, Hotch was already walking towards the door.

They watched on the security feed as Hotch showed Austin his badge and another hostage patted him down, proving he was unarmed. A few minutes later 2 children came running out the door; Ellie was with her little brother and was carrying a strangers baby. A few injured came stumbling after and Hotch slowly pulled those incapable of walking to the front doors as Austin remained near him with his gun aimed pointedly at his head. EMT's rapidly treated and transported the injured to the hospital and Ellie and her brother were met by their hysterical father; their mother was still inside.

"Somebody should tell Beth what's going on." Reid said.

"I'll have Anderson pick her up and bring her here - I don't want her driving after getting bad news." Rossi said. "We've got to get back to work and focus on getting Hotch and the rest of the hostages out safely."

JJ rejoined the group.

"Not a lot of success with the survivors," JJ told them. "Most weren't even close to the shooting and didn't see anything and those that were didn't know anything other than a general description of what he looked like. Derek is helping Emily talk with the employees, hopefully they'll have more success. Any progress on your guys' end?"

Rossi updated them and they too were appalled that Hotch had gone in without even consulting anybody. They diligently watched the camera feed and so far he hadn't shot any more rounds after his initial outburst. They didn't have sound but it seemed like Hotch and Austin were talking.

"Something must have made him angry, he didn't start shooting until after he spoke with the employee." Reid wondered out loud.

"Yeah," JJ ageed. "But he already had the gun with him, clearly he was planning something."

Emily and Derek came up to the group.

"Guys, I think we have something." Emily told them. "One of the employees at the electronics booth - he wasn't supposed to be working that shift. He made a last minute trade at the request of another employee named Hannah Jarvis. What if she was the person the shooter was really looking for back there?"

"You may be onto something," Rossi told her. "Penelope, figure out if Austin Green and Hannah Jarvis knew each other."

"Guys this Green kid was sick - he posted a lot on those incel websites and he hated women. Somehow women are simultaneously disgusting whores yet he is desperate for someone to sleep with. Looks like he did know Hannah Jarvis. His email is linked to a Tinder account but he used fake photos. They chatted for a bit and they set a date to go get coffee, looks like after the date Hannah was no longer interested, not surprising since everything on his profile was fake, but Austin kept relentlessly messaging her. Eventually Hannah replied telling him to leave her alone and he proceeded to call her a bunch of foul names that I refuse to repeat."

"Hannah was his target and he got angry when he found out she wasn't working today." Morgan stated.

"Well the good news is that he had a goal, one victim, not as many bodies as possible. The problem is his one target he didn't get and he's clearly very mentally unstable." Emily added.

"Garcia, continue to dig into Green's life. I want to know if he has a weak spot we can use against him." Rossi instructed her. "Reid, any luck with the blue prints."

"With where they're located within the store we aren't able to get a sniper shot from outside. There's plenty of exits and entrances but the problem is if he notices us before we're able to take him down he could easily shoot all the hostages with his AR-15 before we even reach him. From a tactical standpoint I'm not sure if there's a way we get everyone out alive."

"Maybe Hotch will have better luck from the inside," JJ said hopefully.

Hotch wasn't sure of his angle yet, he didn't know much about this kid and he didn't want to unintentionally anger him further by saying the wrong thing. He looked to be late 20's and Hotch knew he didn't have a plan. He was pacing back and forth in front of the hostages holding the semi-automatic in one hand and biting at his cuticles on the other hand.

"I bet life is great for you, Fed. Chicks must throw themselves as you when they find out you're an FBI agent." Austin's tone was dripping with jealousy and rage.

_Ahhh _Hotch thought to himself. So _that _was his angle.

"No, actually. I'm out of town so much and women don't like that I can't commit every waking second to them. My ex-wife cheated on me and then filed for divorce after I switched from being a lawyer to an agent."

"Ah sucks, man. Women are fucking sluts. They'll fuck anything that can catch or kick a ball but won't actually take the time to get to know a real man."

Hotch just nodded in agreement. He knew this was his best chance at getting everyone out safely. Yet every fiber of his being rejected him talking about women, specifically Haley or Beth, this way.

"I don't blame you for wanting to get revenge. Women should know that a man has needs."

"EXACTLY!" Austin shouted in agreement. "Men need sex. It's a universal fact. It's on par with food and water on the hierarchy of needs. WHY CAN'T WOMEN UNDERSTAND THAT."

"The woman who wronged you, is she here?" Hotch asked him.

"She was supposed to be. She took the day off, probably to go fuck some guy. The fucking slut."

Hotch listened to his rant and planned his next move.

"Dave! Dave!" Rossi turned to the sound of a woman yelling his name. He saw Beth a ways in the distance running as quickly as she could to him while so heavily pregnant. He quickly met up with her and gave her an arm of support. "Dave, what is going on?!"

Beth was clearly on the verge of hysteria.

"As of right now he is okay. We have video feed and he's unharmed. We're working on strategies now - our main goal is getting everyone out safely." Rossi led her to the table where the feed was set up and she watched as Hotch spoke with the armed man, seemingly unphased.

She rubbed her belly over and over again not knowing what else to do with her hands. The midwife had told her to avoid stress - what a joke that was when your fiancee is a special agent with the FBI.

"I can't do this on my own, Dave. I need him. Get him out of there safely. Please!"

"Everyone is doing their best," Morgan piped in. "You just take a seat right here and try to not worry too much, okay?" Morgan pulled up a chair for her and she reluctantly sat down not taking her eyes off of the security footage.

"Please Aaron, please. You can't leave me now. Not when our life together is just beginning. Stay with me, please" Beth muttered to herself hoping that somehow Aaron would hear her.

"C'mon man, we've got to get you out of here. The longer we stay in here the more likely it is that the men with guns come bursting through that door. You have to get out of this alive, you have to spread your message to the world."

"I can't go to prison. I can't."

"I know, but look. You won't be in for long. As far as we know, no one has died." Hotch knew that was a lie. He had dragged those bodies out the door and he knew there was no hope for at least two of them. "You had a good reason, people will sympathize. We have to get you out of here safely so that you can share your message, people need to know what a bitch this woman was." Hotch was really pushing it but he needed to act fast, he knew it wouldn't be much longer before they raided the building. Luckily the other hostages remained quiet.

Austin stood, clearly thinking through what Hotch was telling him. "You really don't think I'll be in for that long?"

"Year, tops." Hotch assured him.

"Okay, I'll go. But you have to come out with me."

Hotch nodded and walked with him towards the door. As they got closer to the front door Hotch spoke to him again.

"You have to give me the gun, man. If you walk out of here with a semi-automatic rifle they'll shoot you on site."

Austin clearly hesitated, but he had already made the decision to trust Hotch, so he handed over the weapon. Hotch continued to walk with him out the front doors of the Walmart. SWAT agents rushed toward them and Hotch handed one of them the weapon before grabbing Austin's arm and wrenching it behind his back and grabbing the other wrist.

"Austin Green you are under arrest…"

Austin began to shout at him clearly realizing that Hotch was not at all on his side. Hotch paid him no mind and continued to read him his Miranda rights before passing him off. He ran his hands through his hair grateful to be out of that Walmart with no more casualties.

"Aaron!" He heard the unmistakable voice of his fiancee.

He found her in the crowd and ran to her sweeping her into a hug.

"Oh my god, thank god you are safe. I was so worried." Beth was sobbing at this point, finally able to release all the worry she had been storing up since the knock had come to her door.

"Shhhh," Hotch consoled her and rubbed her back. "I'm right here. I'm just fine."

He just continued to rub her back and whisper in her ear that he was fine while she held onto him for dear life.

"Hey, let's go home, yeah?" Hotch asked her after her sobbing had slowly simmered down. Beth just nodded her head and finally released him so she could wipe the tears from her face.

He led them to the SUV saying goodbye to the team on the way and opened the passenger side door for her before getting in on the drivers side.

"Don't you have paperwork or something you need to do, I don't mind sitting in your office for a little bit." Beth told him, regaining her composure.

"It's been a long day and everyone deserves some rest, it can wait until tomorrow." He assured her. In reality the whole ordeal had taken less than 2 hours, but it had seemed like much longer. "Where's Jack?"

"Jessie picked him up from school, she said she'd keep him overnight. I asked her not to tell him what was going on. I didn't want to needlessly scare him if things turned out okay, which thank god they did."

Hotch placed his hand on her leg. "Thanks, that was a good call."

Hotch drove them home and they ordered taco's from the local Mexican restaurant.

"What do you want to watch?" Hotch asked her. She was cuddled up next to his side.

"Something light-hearted," she responded. "I've had enough heavy for one day."

Hotch nodded in agreement before turning on Friends. He closed his eyes as he felt the subtle movements of their baby under his hand and the sound of the laugh track in the background. His job wasn't always easy - but if he could always come home to this then Hotch was sure he'd be just fine.


	17. Chapter 17

September 30th, 2013 - 41 weeks pregnant

Hotch badged into the FBI feeling impatient. It was a Monday morning and he really hadn't expected to be coming back into work this week. Beth was officially a week past due and he had been convinced that she was going to give birth over the weekend. But the contractions stayed irregular and there were still no signs of active labor. The only one more impatient than Hotch for the baby to arrive was Beth, herself.

"Still no baby?" JJ looked sympathetic, it was a question but she said it more as a statement.

"Unfortunately no, she has an appointment this afternoon that I'm going to try and go to with her. She's working from home - we both expected to be out on parental leave by now but this baby isn't exactly sticking to our timeline."

"Poor Beth, she must be miserable."

"She's hanging in there, but she's ready to be done. I think she's getting anxious about giving birth and the waiting is killing her."

JJ just nodded sympathetically - Henry had unexpectedly come 2 weeks early so she had little advice to offer.

Hotch sat at his desk catching up on paperwork. The team had gotten back yesterday from a complex case in Orlando and everyone had their fair share to work on. His phone buzzed as he worked on the case report.

*How's work going? Still thinking you'll be able to go the appointment with me?*

He had made more progress on the report than he had expected in the couple of hours he had been at work.

*I should be able to come. It's at 1PM, right? I'll pick you up from the house at 12:30?*

*Sounds great. I'll be here. Still massively pregnant.*

Hotch just chuckled and set down his phone. He needed coffee before resuming the paperwork. Beth wasn't sleeping very well these days and as a result; neither was he. Soon they wouldn't be sleeping because they would have a newborn to tend to, that seemed preferable to their current situation.

Hotch waited for Reid to refill his coffee mug before filling his own.

"You know, only four percent of babies are born on their actual due date. But the statistics are in favor of Beth having given birth by now."

"Thanks, Reid. I'm sure that will make her feel better." Hotch replied dryly. Spencer just gave him the classic awkward nod and walked back to his desk. Hotch refilled his coffee mug, drank half of it, and then topped it back off before heading back to his desk. He never realized office work could be so draining but the last 4 weeks had seemed like four months. Slowly his morning ticked away and finally it was time to pick Beth up and head to the appointment.

*Leaving work now. Be there in 10.*

He pulled into the driveway and Beth was waiting for him on the front porch swing. She got in the car and Hotch leaned over the center console to kiss her cheek and give her belly a pat.

"How was work this morning?" She asked him.

"Boring, but fine. The team sends their sympathy."

Beth chuckled. "I was talking to Jessie. She was wondering if she could pick Jack up from school and keep him tonight? I told her I would discuss it with you but I didn't think it would be a problem. It would give us a chance to try and do some things that could induce labor. Eat spicy food for dinner, go on a long walk, sex…" She trailed off.

"That sounds fine to me; although maybe sex and then spicy food?" Hotch joked with her. Beth just lightly punched his arm in response.

They pulled into the parking lot of the OB office and Hotch held the door for her as they walked inside. They were called back into one of the rooms and their midwife came in.

"Well Miss. Clemmons everything with your pregnancy is picture perfect. Your blood pressure is great, you're not diabetic, your baby's heart rate looks great on the monitor. At 37 years old you are considered "advanced maternal age" but just barely. If you wanted to be induced we could use that as an official reason but if you'd rather wait for labor to come on naturally I think that would also be a safe decision. What are your thoughts?"

Beth glanced at Hotch. "I'm really hoping to avoid an induction but I'll be the first to admit I'm getting anxious to be done. What are your thoughts on inducing versus waiting?"

"Well we could check your cervix if you wanted? It might give us a little more information to go off of. I don't see anywhere in your chart that you've been checked yet?"

"No, they've offered a couple of times but I declined. I guess I didn't really see the point. But now I am curious to know." Beth told her.

"Okay, well we can do that for you. You'll need to take off your pants and underwear and lay flat on your back. Then just bring your ankles together and let your knees relax to the sides."

Beth did as she said as the midwife gloved up and squeezed gel onto her fingers.

"You're going to feel my touch against the inside of your thigh and then lots of pressure, okay?"

Beth grabbed Aaron's hand and squeezed. It was thankfully not as bad as she was expecting. She felt the midwife sweep her fingers around a couple of times and then it was over.

"Well Miss. Clemmons. You're already 5 centimeters dilated."

"What?!" Beth said with surprise.

"Is that even possible without her being in labor?" Hotch asked the midwife.

"It's pretty rare that a mom get this dilated before labor, especially a first time mom, but it does happen. Your cervix is fairly far back and your baby is pretty high in your pelvis but 5 centimeters is still an excellent starting point."

"So what do you think about possibly inducing now that she's 5 centimeters?" Hotch asked her.

"Well honestly I think you'd have a fairly good shot at a decent induction considering you're further along than we would have expected. That being said I think if you wait for labor to come on naturally it will be a decently quick process for you and you wouldn't have to spend the whole time laboring in the hospital - you could labor at home where you'd be more comfortable. With you being as far along as you are I would be surprised if it was more than a couple of days before your body kicks into labor"

Beth glanced at Hotch again, not knowing what the correct decision was.

"It's up to you, babe." He told her.

"I think I want to wait and see if labor starts on its own." Beth said.

"I think that's an excellent decision. Labor at home for as long as you feel comfortable but if your water breaks or you start feeling like you need something to help with the pain come straight to triage, okay?"

"Okay, thank you."

The midwife exited the room and Hotch helped her off the exam table and get her pants back on.

"I can't believe our baby is going to be born in October. This whole time I was counting on a September baby." Beth said to him.

"Well, this way Jack and the new baby can share a birthday month. Hey, if you're willing to wait another 8 days they could share an actual birth day!"

"Don't even joke about such things, Hotchner." Beth glared at him and Hotch just gave her a sweet smile in return.

"Do you need anything before I go back to work?" He asked her as they walked back to the car.

"I don't think so. Are you sure you have to go back into work?" Beth looked disappointed and it took everything in him not to just go back home and take a nap with her in their bed.

Hotch opened the car door for her before going around to the drivers side and getting in. "Honestly I could take the afternoon off but any time I take off now is going to be time I don't get off once the baby is actually here."

"I know. And really I have more work to finish up. I'll see you when you get home and we can go for that walk." She reached out and placed her hand on his leg as he drove her back home.

The ride home was comfortably quiet and Hotch enjoyed the weight of her hand on his leg. He pulled back into their driveway and opened the garage door for her to get back inside. Hotch got out of the car and pulled her into a hug.

"Not too many more days of being pregnant, I promise." Hotch told her as she clung tightly to him.

Beth nodded in agreement. "Try not to work too late, okay?"

"Okay." Hotch agreed. He leaned down and met his lips with hers giving her a soft kiss before getting back in the car and waving goodbye to her.

Beth headed inside and got back to work herself. The minutes seemed to take hours before finally her work for the day was finally done. She closed her laptop and sighed.

"You can come anytime now, ya know?" She said down to her belly. She felt a little nudge in response. "I'll take that as a no, then."

She stood to go up the stairs and despite the midwife telling her the baby was high in her pelvis the pressure seemed to be increasing by the hour. It felt like soon the baby would just fall right on out of her; if only it was that easy. She changed into exercise clothes and laid in bed just waiting for Hotch to come home. Not too long after she heard the distinctive sound of the garage door opening and she heard Hotch come up the stairs.

He looked at her laying in the bed. "You still want to go for that walk?" He asked her skeptically.

"Yes," she replied definitively. "You may need to help me out of this bed though."

"Let me get changed and then I'll help you out."

She admired the view as he changed out of his work clothes and into shorts and a t-shirt. He finished pulling the shirt over his head and proceeded to lean down and grab her hands with his, pulling her off the bed and into his arms. He kissed her a few times, they had been so on edge this past week thinking the baby would be coming at any moment that they hadn't enjoyed their last days as a family of 3. Now Jack was away for the night and Hotch was determined to make this night enjoyable for them.

"Walk and then Indian food for dinner? I could pick up from that place with the samosa's that you love?"

"I like the way you think Aaron Hotchner," she smiled at him.

They walked to the park close to their house and walked the trail around it; a little over a mile long. Beth was feeling out of breath from carrying a full term baby around with her, her feet felt puffy, and her back ached like something fierce.

"Do you want to go around again?" Hotch asked her.

"I physically don't think I can, I'm so sorry."

"Don't apologize, you're literally carrying a whole other human. Are you okay to walk home, I can run and grab the car?"

"No, that's not necessary. I can definitely make it home." She said it with confidence but her back really was hurting like crazy. "I might take a bath while you get the Indian food."

Hotch took her hand and they walked home, her pace slowing the longer they walked. As soon as they got home Beth leaned over the back of the couch so her belly was hanging down.

"Are you okay?" Hotch asked her, visibly worried.

"Yeah," she groaned. "I'm just trying to get some of the pressure off my back. It's really hurting for some reason."

Hotch stood behind her and applied pressure to her lower back where it was hurting. Much to Beth's surprise it helped the pain significantly.

"Whatever you're doing, please don't stop. It's really helping."

"It's called counter-pressure, it's supposed to help with back pain in labor. I read about it in one of the labor support books you bought me."

"Thank god for you and your diligent reading habits." Beth groaned as the pain intensified. "Do you really think I could be going into labor?"

"Maybe?" Hotch honestly had no idea. "Let's get the bath going and I'll get you some water. They told us that being dehydrated can bring on false labor."

Hotch ran upstairs and started the bath before coming back down to help Beth get to the bathroom. She kept her breathing steady and her eyes on the prize. She could feel her body relax as she entered into the warm water and the pain seemed to slowly melt away.

"Better?" Hotch asked her.

Beth nodded. "I'm not sure I want you to leave to go pick up food, I'm not feeling that hungry anyway. Would you just get me a banana and some water?"

Hotch ran down to grab what she asked for and was soon back at her side in the tub.

"The pain is a lot better in the tub, but I can still feel it waxing and waning. I'm worried that when I get out it will hit with full force again."

Hotch took her hand from the side of the tub and kissed it. "Stay in for as long as you need, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it."

Beth closed her eyes and tried to find some rest but Hotch could hear her breathing change as the pain got worse and then eased again. Soon it wasn't just breathing changes but audible moaning but her eyes stayed closed and she tried to stay relaxed. Finally after 45 minutes she opened her eyes and looked at Hotch.

"Aaron, I think we need to go to the hospital."

Hotch felt himself snap into his work mode. He kept a calm demeanor and methodically worked through tasks. He helped her out of the tub, he helped her get dried off, he held pressure on her back when a contraction hit. One thing at a time. He helped her get dressed. He helped find her shoes. The whole time he tried not to let the distraught sounds of her breathing and groaning distract him. They got down the stairs and he put their birth "go bags" in the car and helped her into the passenger seat. He hadn't even pulled out of the driveway yet when he heard a gasp.

"Aaron, I think my water just broke." Hotch looked down to see the front of her joggers were wet. Then another contraction hit and Beth groaned louder than ever before - almost verging on a scream. "Holy shit, please drive!"

The 15 minute drive to the hospital took them only 9 minutes but it seemed to take hours. Beth got louder and louder as things got more intense and Hotch had never in all his years as an FBI agent felt so helpless. He pulled into the circle drive of the hospital and ran to help Beth out of the car. She held onto him for dear life as they walked into the hospital and the greeter immediately found them a wheelchair.

Hotch rushed her up to the labor & delivery triage area and hearing her groans the nurses came to assist her very quickly.

"Okay, Miss Clemmons? We're just going to check your cervix to see where you're at and then it sounds like we're going to admit you so you can have this baby."

"She was 5 centimeters in the office this afternoon," Hotch informed them as he helped Beth scramble to take her pants and underwear off before another contraction hit.

"You're going to feel my touch and cold gel," the nurse told her.

The check was quick compared to the office. "Alright Miss Clemmons, you're already 9 centimeters dilated so we're going to get you admitted into a room so you can have your baby!"

The nurse looked excited for her but Beth was terrified. "I really want an epidural," she told the nurse.

"We'll try but it seems like your labor is moving pretty fast. We have to get an IV in and get your labs back before we can call the anesthesiologist." The nurse told her.

"Aaron," Beth looked around, panicked for her fiance.

"I'm right here, babe." Aaron stepped next to her and grabbed her hand. "You're doing just fine okay, you can do this."

Beth just nodded vigorously at him clearly trying to believe what he was saying.

"We're just going to push you in this bed to your room so keep your hands inside the rails," two nurses had already started pushing the stretcher and Beth nearly screamed as another contraction clenched around her abdomen. Between her back, her stomach, and the pressure down below Beth felt like she was about to lose all control.

As they pushed her into a labor room Beth glanced around. There must have been four other nurses in there setting everything up.

One of the nurses in the room came up to her. "My name is Maddie and I'm going to be your nurse, whenever you're ready we'll get you into the other bed."

Beth just nodded feeling unable to find words. Hotch went to her side and helped her off the stretcher and onto the hospital bed. She felt overwhelmed as they surrounded her to start an IV, have her sign consent forms, asking her questions like if she had a place for the baby to sleep or a ride home from the hospital. Everything would pause in the room as she had a contraction and everyone would just murmur words of encouragement as Hotch held her hand. Finally the pain became too much to bear and Beth flipped onto her hands and knees on the bed, the only position that provided even minimal relief. Another contraction hit her and the pressure was impossible to ignore.

"It feels like the baby is coming out of my butt," she gasped as the pressure built.

In this moment the midwife walked into her room, it was a midwife she had met in the office a few times and knew she liked. "Beth, my name is Sue. We've met a few times in the office. Sounds like you're ready to have a baby."

"I really wanted to have an epidural," Beth told her, hopelessly.

"Okay, well let's check and see. If you're completely dilated then I think the best pain relief is just going to be to push and have a baby. If you're still 9 then we can work towards that epidural."

"Do I have to get on my back?" Beth asked her.

"No, just stay right there."

Beth felt the cool gel and another contraction hit. "Go ahead and push with this contraction, Beth." The midwife told her.

Beth bared down and nearly screamed as the pain became so intense.

"Beth, you're completely dilated and your baby is right there. Even if we did have time for an epidural which I don't think we do I'm not sure it would do you much good at this point. I think we just need to push and have a baby, okay?" The midwife explained to her as gently as she could.

Beth locked eyes with Aaron, she was completely terrified. It never occurred to her that an epidural wouldn't be an option. She had been counting on it.

"You are the strongest person I know, you can do this. I am right here with you." Aaron stayed right up at the head of the bed. As close to her as he could be. "You can do this." He repeated.

Ten minutes later Beth's eyes were watering from a pain she never could have imagined. The ring of fire was putting it lightly.

"They're almost here, Beth. The baby is almost here. One more push." Hotch told her. Beth gave it everything she had and she felt the moment the baby finally left her body. It was the most relief she had ever felt in her life. Soon the baby was between her knees being dried off with warm towels.

"You did it!" Sue exclaimed. "Reach down and grab your baby!"

Beth reached down and pulled the small, wet, naked baby to her chest and sat back on her knees. The tears started pouring as the relief continued to wash over her. The baby was finally here. Beth clutched the baby to her chest as Aaron and the nurse helped her off of her knees and onto her back on the bed. She relaxed into the bed, the baby she had worked so hard for crying in her arms.

"You did it," Aaron smiled at her. His eyes brimming with unshed tears. "We have a daughter."

"We have a daughter," she grinned back at him.

Hotch placed his large hand over their daughters back and leaned in to kiss Beth's sweaty temple. "I'm so proud of you." He told her before kissing her again.

Beth and Hotch just stared in awe of their new baby girl as the room bustled around them. The placenta was delivered, her nurse got her cleaned up and donned her with fancy mesh panties and pads as thick as a diaper, a different nurse checked the baby's vitals. Finally, 30 minutes after the baby was born they had their first moment alone as a family.

"What time is it, is there time for Jack to come meet her tonight?" Beth asked him. She had no concept of time and she now realized she didn't even know what time the baby had been born.

"It's not quite 9:30. She was born at 8:58. I texted Jessica about 10 minutes ago and she said she would bring him up right away."

"Perfect," Beth sighed with contentment. "He should be here with us."

Their nurse Maddie came back in to press on her uterus and check her bleeding to make sure everything was okay. It was uncomfortable but nothing compared to what she had just been through.

"She looks like she's rooting around a bit, how would you feel about trying to get her latched on."

Beth agreed and the nurse helped her get into the best position to latch the new baby onto her breast. It took a few tries but finally she opened her mouth and started feeding.

"She's a natural," Maddie said. "I would let her feed for as long as she likes, hopefully at least 15 minutes, and when she's done offer the other side. I can help you get her relatched if you'd like."

"Thank you, for everything." Beth said to her as she gazed down at the baby suckling at her breast.

The baby nursed for about 20 minutes before drifting off to sleep. Beth pulled her off and laid her once again against her chest. She snuggled right in keeping her eyes closed the entire time. There was a soft knock at the door and it opened just enough for Jack to peak his head in.

"Is the baby here?!" Jack asked excitedly.

Hotch went to the door and took Jack by the hand. "Jack, come meet your sibling."

Beth smiled at him pulling the blankets back so he could get a better view of the baby's face.

"Jack, this is Luna Aaron Hotchner. Your baby sister."


	18. Chapter 18

October 4th, 2013 - 4 days old

"What are you doing down here? It's 3 AM, come back to bed."

Beth glanced up and saw Hotch had come downstairs to the living room. She gestured to the nursing baby with a nod of her head.

"Luna's been cluster feeding all night so I decided to come down here so you could get some rest."

Hotch plopped himself down on the couch next to her and stroked the baby's soft foot as she ate.

"I don't want rest. Okay that's a lie, I do want rest. But more than that I want my fiancee and my daughter in my room with me. If you're not sleeping I shouldn't be either."

Beth just chuckled and sleepily rested her head on Hotch's shoulder. "One of us should be coherent, for poor Jack's sake."

"Meh, Jack is pretty much self sufficient. He can make toast for breakfast and easy mac for lunch. Seriously Beth, you don't need to come downstairs to feed the baby."

"I know I know. She just wouldn't settle unless she was nursing and there isn't much you can do to help that. So I figured you might as well get some sleep."

"Well she looks settled now, so why don't we try and put her in her bassinet and get some rest."

Beth glanced down and the babe was fast asleep. She could feel the warm breath against her breast and hoped that after eating for the better part of 3 hours Luna would finally let them sleep. Hotch eased the baby off of her nursing pillow and into his arms while Beth dutifully applied the lanolin to her sore nipples. So far postpartum was more than she had bargained for.

"Come on, let's get some rest." Hotch held out his free hand to her so she took it and stood from the couch.

"Will you just give me a hug for a second?" Beth asked, feeling particularly vulnerable in her sleep deprived haze.

Hotch pulled her in against his chest and wrapped his free arm tight around her shoulders. He held Luna against his side with his other arm and felt Beth bury her face into his neck. He twisted his head to kiss her cheek. He realized that in the chaos of welcoming a newborn he had shown his fiancée very little affection. Usually there were goodnight kisses, good morning kisses, hello kisses, goodbye kisses but with no sleep schedule and very little leaving of the house he hadn't simply kissed her just because. He slowly ran his fingertips over her shoulder blades and after a few moments Beth pulled away and sighed.

"I love you," she told him.

Hotch smiled and leaned in to kiss her gently. "I love you too. Let's go to bed."

They went upstairs and Hotch cautiously laid the babe down in her bassinet on Beth's side of the bed.

"Grace and Roger want to take Jack on Sunday to celebrate his birthday a day early, with your mom here maybe she can watch Lou for a couple hours so we can take a nap."

"Don't even tempt me with such forbidden words like nap." Beth chuckled as she laid down in bed. "What are we going to do for Jack for his birthday? It kinda snuck up on us."

"I'm not sure, but we don't have to figure it out right this second. Let's go to sleep."

Hotch laid down on the bed next to her and the two of them were asleep within minutes.

—

"Jack we gotta go, dude!" Hotch yelled to his son from the bottom of the stairs.

"I'm coming, I just have to brush my teeth!" The boy yelled back.

"I made sure my mom has your number so she can call you - you know how she is with airports. You'll probably have to meet her in baggage claim, I don't think she'd be able to find her way to your car."

Hotch and Jack were picking Beth's mom Rosie up from the airport. She was coming to stay with them for a week to meet her new granddaughter and help around the house.

"It'll be fine, we're more than happy to meet her inside. Do you want me to pick up anything for lunch on our way back?"

"Yes, please. We never did get that Indian food."

"Sounds delicious," Hotch smiled at her.

Jack made his way downstairs and made his way over to the couch where Beth was sitting with Luna.

"She's eating again?!" He asked her. "I feel like she's always eating!"

"You and me both, kid." Beth agreed with him. "Thanks for going with your dad to pick up Grandma Rosie, love you."

"Love you too, mom." Jack leaned over and kissed Beth's cheek and then patted the baby's head. "Bye, Lulu. Love you too."

Hotch smiled at the interaction before leaning over the back of the couch to kiss the same cheek that Jack did. "Bye, babe. Bye, Luna."

"Say bye, Luna!" Beth reached down and waved the newborns hand goodbye. The door shut and Beth felt a strange sense of relief.

Postpartum was overwhelming to say the least, and she hadn't had a moment to herself since it all started. Her milk came in yesterday and she felt constantly engorged despite nursing for what seemed like 12 hours a day. Her stitches were sore and she had to be mindful when sitting down. Her stomach was deflated but still soft and not her own. She took a few deep breaths to center herself and noticed that the baby had stopped eating and was asleep in her arms.

"Shhh you're okay sweet girl, you're okay." She gingerly placed her in the swing, a baby shower gift from the team that had so far been a godsend.

Beth just stared at the baby. Her baby. In awe of what her and Aaron had created together. Now that she was here it seemed ridiculous that they had never considered babies in the first place. She couldn't tell who she looked like. She had gobs of dark hair - but she could have gotten that from either of them. Her blue eyes looked like Beth's but all babies were born with blue eyes, right? They could change. She had long fingers and toes and perfectly squishy cheeks. Beth wasn't certain who she looked like, but she was certain that she was perfect.

She laid back down on the couch and turned on The Office, Hotch couldn't stand it so she could only watch it when he was gone. It was her favorite episode, the dinner party with Michael and Jan, but she was asleep before the theme song even played.

Beth awoke when the smell of spicy curry filled her nostrils.

"Hey, we're home. Your mom's here." Hotch was crouched down next to the couch, his face near hers.

Beth nodded still in a daze from her nap. "You're home already?" She glanced over to Luna who was still napping in her swing.

"It's been almost two hours." Hotch told her.

"Wow, that was a good nap apparently. Where's mom?"

"Jack is helping her carry her bags to the guest room."

Hotch helped Beth off the couch and right on cue Jack and Rosie came down the stairs.

"Bethy!" It is so good to see you!" Rosie pulled her into a fierce hug and Beth happily hugged her back despite the sore boobs.

"It's so good to see you too, mom. I've missed you!"

"Lemme see that sweet girl of yours, I've just been dying with only photos and FaceTime for the last four days!"

Beth gestured to the swing and Rosie immediately awed over her new granddaughter.

"Well she's just perfect, isn't she?"

Beth and Aaron both nodded in agreement. "She's probably going to want to nurse again soon but you can hold her if you want?" Beth asked her.

"Yes, please! Not sure if I can figure out how to stop this contraption though. Aaron, would you be so kind?"

"Of course." Hotch turned off the Mamaroo swing and unbuckled his daughter. He swooped her up next to his face to kiss her several times on her cheek before handing her over to her grandma.

"Well aren't you just the sweetest baby there ever was?! Come snuggle with Grandma Rosie, we're going to be good friends." Rosie sat on the couch next to Beth. "How are you feeling? Are you doing okay?" She asked her daughter.

"Come on Jack, let's get some fresh air for a bit and let your mom and Grandma Rosie talk."

Outside Hotch and Jack kicked around the soccer ball. Fall was settling in and the cool air felt good as they ran around the backyard.

"What do you want to do to celebrate your birthday, buddy?"

Jack just shrugged his shoulders and shot the ball past Hotch and into the goal.

"Seriously buddy, there's got to be something you want to do to celebrate. Let's think of some fun things we could do."

Hotch sat down on the grass and patted for Jack to sit down next to him. Jack sat and played with the grass.

"I like it when we go camping together. Just you and me."

"Ahh" Hotch understood why he was hesitant to bring it up. "I think you know why we can't go camping this year buddy - but I really like it when we do that too. Maybe next year?"

"Yeah, maybe." Jack replied. Still playing with the grass.

"Well your grandparents are excited to spend time with you tomorrow. I know your grandma wanted to make cupcakes with you to take into school for your birthday.

"Can I go to my room and read, dad?"

Hotch felt defeated. "Sure, bud. Hey Jack… you know I love you, right?"

"I know, dad."

Hotch remained in the grass and watched his son walk back inside and up to his bedroom.

—-

Hotch laid in bed with Luna sleeping against his bare chest. Every night he did skin to skin with her as Beth would shower and get ready for bed. He loved their bonding time and was grateful he had decided to take four weeks off from work. He already dreaded leaving her.

"I'm worried about Jack." He said to Beth who was changing into her pajamas.

"I know he's been a little distant since we brought Luna home but that's pretty normal, right?"

"I guess, every year we take a camping trip to celebrate his birthday. He knows why we can't go this year, he's just taking it harder than I expected. He's usually so easy going I didn't think missing one year would be such a big deal to him."

"I know Jack loves me. And I know Jack loves Luna. But Aaron he's had a lot of big changes these past couple months just like we have. He's used to having you all to himself, and now he has to share you with me and a new baby. I think it's more than fair if that gets to him every once in a while."

Hotch stroked the soft skin of his daughters back and smoothed the hair on top of her head.

"You're right, I'm just not sure what I can do about it right now. I mean we can't go camping. I'm not willing to leave you and Lulu overnight right now."

Beth climbed into bed next to Hotch. "Well I appreciate that but I think I have an idea? What if we set up the tent in the backyard. We could get a projector and have an outdoor movie night, then you and Jack can sleep in the tent and Luna and I will sleep in the house. Not quite the same as camping but hopefully he'll still like it."

"That still means I'm away from you and Lou for a night."

"You'll just be right outside, Aaron. If I really need you I can come and get you. I think it's a good compromise."

"I do think he'd like it, and the outdoor movie night seems awesome. You're a good mom, you know that?"

Beth smiled and leaned over to kiss Hotch on the lips softly. "Now give me that baby so I can feed her and we can go to sleep."

Hotch reluctantly pulled the baby off his chest and handed her to Beth who was slowly getting the hang of getting her latched on.

"Mom said she'd be happy to watch Luna for a bit tomorrow so we can catch a nap in the afternoon while Jack's at Grace and Rogers."

"She's a good woman, I'm glad she's able to be here with you."

"Me too," Beth chuckled. "But she's also very Southern."

Hotch looked confused. "What do you mean?"

"She may or may not have implied that if I don't get my body back and start putting out again within a reasonable time frame you might get a wandering eye."

"Oh good lord, is that really what she thinks about me?"

"Less about you and more about me, babe. It's the woman's job to keep her man happy, don't you know? She also doesn't love the fact that we're living together and procreating out of wedlock. She thinks we should go to the courthouse sooner rather than later to rectify that situation. But overall, she has been really helpful with cooking and cleaning so I'll look past the passive aggressive comments."

"Well as soon as you're up for it we can head to the courthouse," Hotch winked at her.

"I do like the idea of a small wedding. Something low-key and calm. And I've always wanted to get married outside, maybe this spring?"

"That sounds perfect. I love you."

Hotch leaned over and kissed her as she nursed their baby.

"I love you too," Beth responded.


	19. Chapter 19

October 11, 2013 - 11 days old

"Did you have a good birthday party, bud?" Hotch asked his son as he and Beth put him to bed.

The night of Jack's actual birthday he had camped in the backyard with his dad and they had made hot dogs and smores over the fire but since it was a school night they had saved his real party for the weekend. Henry and Jack's friends from school came over and they had an outdoor movie night where they curled up with blankets in chairs and watched Star Wars Episode IV while eating popcorn and M&M's.

"Yeah it was so much fun, dad. Star Wars was really cool, can we watch the other movies?"

"Definitely bud, just not tonight. You have a soccer game early tomorrow morning and you need your sleep."

"Is Adam's mom going to pick me up and take me to soccer like last week?"

"Not this week Jack, I think we're all going to try and come to your game." Beth told him.

"Even you and Luna?" He asked her.

"Even me and Luna," she reassured him.

"Sleep tight big man, we love you." Hotch told his son before leaning down and kissing his forehead.

"See you in the morning, Jack." Beth leaned down and kissed the same spot before ruffling his hair.

"Night," Jack replied sleepily before rolling over and closing his eyes.

They shut his door and peeked into Luna's nursery where she was napping in her crib. She was sleeping overnight in a bassinet in their room but they were slowly trying to introduce her to her crib for naps throughout the day. Hotch preferred to hold her throughout her naps and usually did just that but Beth insisted since it was she that was going to have to be home with her once Hotch went back to work that she get acclimated to the crib.

"Sleeping like a baby," Hotch smiled at her.

"Both of our kids asleep at a reasonable hour. Unheard of." Beth joked.

Hotch glanced at his watch. "I bet we have another 45 minutes to an hour before she wakes up hungry. What should we do?"

"Eat leftover birthday cake and watch this weeks episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine?" Beth wiggled her eyebrows at him.

Hotch laughed. "Sure, babe."

Hotch had to admit, he usually found any sort of police or FBI show ridiculously unrealistic but the comedic aspect of Brooklyn Nine-Nine was surprisingly enjoyable thus far. He cut them two extra large pieces of cake and settled in next to Beth on the couch.

"It's been so nice having you home every evening for the last month. I've gotten too used to it." Beth admitted and she snuggled in against his side and took a bite of the chocolate cake.

"I know. I'm worried I have too. But it wasn't that long ago that we weren't even living in the same state so we can do it. And it's been so much easier on me having you be home with Jack. Of course I trust Jessica but knowing that he's home and on the same routine even when I'm gone is so comforting. Thank you for that." Hotch kissed her briefly before taking a bite of his own cake.

"You don't have to thank me. That's my kid too. It feels weird saying that because I never want to negate that Haley's was also his mother. But I swear to god Aaron I love that kid as much as I love Lou."

"I know you do. I know. And I want _you_ to know that knowing that makes me happier than I ever thought I could be."

Hotch reached his hand out and cupped her face. Slowly with the tips of his finger he stroked her cheek before leaning in to her and kissing her longer. Beth eagerly sank into the kiss and pulled his bottom lip between hers running her tongue across it.

"Mm. I miss you," she whispered against his lips.

"So I've been thinking about something and I think I know what you're going to say but I want to run it by you anyway." Hotch said to her as he leaned back into the couch.

"Okay," Beth replied patiently

"Right now if something were to happen to me then Jack goes to live with Jessie. But I don't want him to lose you, or his sister, or his home. I figured we would just wait until we got married to finalize the details that he would stay with you but I don't want to wait. I want to get it finalized before I go back to work at the end of the month."

"Okay," she agreed nodding.

"And now that there is you and Luna to think about I want to increase my life insurance policy too. I don't want you guys to have to worry about anything if I'm not here. It'll be expensive because of the high risk nature of my job but I think it will be worth it."

"Aaron, stop. Please, stop. I agree with everything you are saying. I'm with you fully. But I am sleep deprived and two weeks postpartum and if you say one more thing about you dying then I'm gonna have a complete break down. So do what you have to do and know that I trust you."

Hotch smiled sheepishly at her. "Let's watch some TV."

Beth nodded in agreement before cuddling in against his side as the opening scene played.

"Babe. Babe. Wake up." Hotch was gently shaking Beth who had fallen asleep no more than 5 minutes into the episode. "Luna's crying. I need you to move so I can go get her."

Still feeling disoriented Beth moved her body so that she was sitting up and out of Hotch's way. She was still rubbing the sleep out of her eyes when Hotch came back down the stairs consoling their crying baby.

"Shhhh sweet girl. Daddy's got you. You're okay. Shhh."

"Daddy's got useless nipples." Beth remarked as she pulled down the clasp of her nursing tank and reached out for the baby.

"Yes, but I hear they're aesthetically pleasing." Hotch joked with her as he reluctantly handed the baby over to her mother.

"Will you hand me my nursing pillow?" she asked unamused by his jokes.

Hotch grabbed it and watched in amazement as their daughter latched onto Beth's breast to eat. He had watched it countless times over the last 11 days and it still seemed miraculous. Everything about Luna filled him with wonder - his experiences with her as a newborn vastly different than his experiences with Jack. With Jack he had felt so out of place, like someone had stuck him into this role as a father then left him behind to fend for himself. Haley had gladly taken on the role of a stay at home mom and he had retreated farther into work. At work he felt like he belonged and he knew his role. At home he felt flustered and inadequate. He wasn't sure if the difference was Beth, Luna, or just his experience as a father over the last 8 years but here and now he felt adequate. Like he could be a good father, a good husband, and a good unit chief. Sometimes things had to bend - that he was sure of, but he had been off work for nearly 2 weeks and out of the field for 3 before that and the team was fine. They were functioning just as well and catching killers, so maybe he could allow work to take a backseat for a bit. He knew that being a profiler was a part of who he was, but maybe it didn't have to be the _biggest _part.

"What's on your mind, Hotchner?" Beth asked him.

Hotch shook his head. He hadn't realized he'd been staring at her.

"Nothing. Just grateful to have this time with you and the kids." He smiled at her.

"Well maybe it's the hormones talking but I'd birth 100 more kids if it meant I got four weeks off with you every time."

"Well I'm not sure about 100 but I could maybe be convinced on one more." Hotch said as he sat down on the couch next to her.

"Seriously?" Beth looked at him incredulously.

"Why is that so hard to believe?"

"Well we just never even talked about having one kid, let alone more than one." Beth replied still in a bit of disbelief.

"Honestly I didn't really think about it much until recently. For the longest time I thought Jack was going to be an only child. But now we have Luna and we're basically starting over so I don't think it's unreasonable to have a third, if we wanted to. I could honestly go either way so it's up to you."

"Jesus Christ you're dropping all the life and death decisions on me tonight." Beth groaned.

Hotch just chuckled. "We definitely don't have to decide right now. Just know that in the future that door can be opened if you want it to be."

"What are we going to do for birth control in the meantime. I mean clearly IUD's don't work the greatest for me. I could try the pill? I just don't want to end up with Irish twins."

"Abstinence seems to be doing the trick right now."

"Okay well assuming we want to have a sex life again at some point. I mean do we really want to go back to using condoms like we did at the beginning of our relationship?" Beth asked him.

"Condoms aren't the worst thing in the world. If that's what's going to make you the most comfortable then we can make it work."

"It just seems ridiculous to have to be using condoms when we're in a monogamous relationship. But I also feel kind of distrustful of any type of hormonal birth control for obvious reasons." Beth gestured down with her head to the baby nursing at her breast.

"Let's not worry about it right now. We still have four weeks to go before this is a real problem. Talk to your midwife about it when you go for your appointment and I'll have a box of condoms on standby just in case."

Beth nodded in agreement. "She's falling asleep and I'm not far behind her, do you mind changing her diaper and putting her in the bassinet while I brush my teeth?"

"Not at all, come here sweet girl," Hotch pulled the tiny baby to his chest and she voiced her displeasure at being separated from her food source. "I know. I know. It's time for bed."

Hotch took her to the nursery and laid her on the changing pad. He changed her diaper and put her in the snuggliest pajamas before swaddling her in a light blanket and carrying her to their room.

"Goodnight sweet Luna we love you so much," he told her as he covered her face with kisses before gently placing her in her bassinet.

"Fatherhood looks good on you, Hotchner." Beth remarked as she exited the bathroom.

"I've been a father the whole time you've known me," he chuckled at her.

"Yeah but now you've got two kids so it's doubly hot."

"Wow, imagine how sexy I'll be when we get around to having a third," he winked at her.


	20. Chapter 20

October 26th, 2013 - 4 weeks old

"You're such a good baby, yes you are!" Emily cooed at the baby in her lap as Luna stared up at her with bright eyes. "Seriously guys, she is so adorable how do you ever put her down?"

"Between the three of us she doesn't get set down often." Beth chuckled.

"So Jack likes being a big brother?" JJ asked.

"At first he seemed a bit indifferent - he liked her but he didn't have a whole lot of interest in holding her. Lately he's been wanting to hold her more and more. I think he was just nervous at first." Hotch answered.

"Have you been thinking about another?" Beth asked JJ.

"Thinking about it! Maybe one day." JJ responded but something about her reply seemed off to Beth. "How's she sleeping?"

"Some nights are better than others. She's starting to give us 4-5 hour stretches at night but nothing super consistent. It's okay right now because with Aaron home and Jack in school I can usually get a pretty good nap in during the day. I don't know how it's going to go when he goes back to work on Monday!"

"You'll make it work," Penelope reassured her. "You're a great mom."

Luna started to fuss in Emily's arms and Beth glanced at the time.

"She's probably getting hungry. It's getting close to her bedtime." Beth told her.

"Let's check on the boys in the backyard, guys. I know JJ has been desperate for alone time with her girls lately." Will said as he stood up. Derek, Reid, Rossi, and Hotch all followed suit as Emily handed the increasingly loud baby back to Beth.

Beth chuckled as she snuggled the baby against her chest and maneuvered her top to give Luna access. Once the baby was latched on she covered the baby with a light blanket over her shoulder just in case one of the guys had to come back in for something. "Never thought my boob could clear a room so quickly."

The girls just laughed and nodded their heads in agreement.

"JJ thanks so much for taking Jack tonight. I know he's really excited for his sleepover with Henry!"

"Of course! Honestly it will be a nice distraction."

"Distraction from what?" Beth asked.

"Well. Will and I have been trying for another baby. And it's not going very well."

"Oh JJ, I'm sorry," Beth replied as Emily and Penelope rubbed JJ's back in support.

"Sorry Jayje," Emily murmured.

"It's okay, I'm sure it will happen eventually. And if not we're super happy with just Henry. But I've gotten a bit obsessive about it and I think I need to take a step back and focus on other things for a while. It got to the point where I'd have a mental breakdown if we were on a case while I was ovulating. I felt like we waited all month for our brief window of opportunity and then it was gone without a fair shot."

"Yeah that's so hard. I'm so sorry you're going through that." Beth told her, genuine concern flooding her tone.

"Thanks guys. I just never thought we'd have trouble getting pregnant since we got pregnant with Henry so unexpectedly."

The girls moved on to happier subjects and conversation flowed easily. Beth sipped on the one small glass of white wine she allowed herself on the special occasion and it felt like heaven to be enjoying wine with other real adults. She felt the suckling of her daughter slow and soon it ceased all together, too sleepy and sated to continue.

"I'm just going to put Luna to bed, I'll be back."

Beth took the baby upstairs and swaddled her before laying her in the bassinet and turning on the baby monitor.

"Sleep tight, Lulu. I love you."

She grabbed a sweatshirt and headed back downstairs to go outside where the girls had joined the men. She found Hotch standing on the patio drinking a beer and she happily stood next to him and wrapped her arm around his waist. He casually wrapped his free arm around her and pulled her in tighter against his side.

"Lu's asleep?" He asked her.

"Mhmm the monitors in my pocket."

"Uncle Spencer pass me the ball!" Beth heard Jack shouting and she glanced up to watch them play. Spencer was awkwardly dribbling the ball before he passed it to Jack. She gave him credit for trying.

"Alright boys if you want to watch a movie before bed it's time to get going!" JJ called to the young boys.

"We should probably be going too, pretty boy. Who will those poker players lose all their money too if we're not there?" Morgan playfully shoved Reid.

"I can't believe you let Reid into your poker game." Emily scoffed.

"Hey if Morgan's dumb friends want to give me their money that's on them." Reid shrugged.

"Yeah and I'm sure giving Morgan half your winnings helps motivate him to keep his mouth shut about your card counting abilities." Hotch just chuckled at them.

Morgan and Reid said nothing but Penelope and Emily busted out laughing.

"What are we going to do with you two?" Penelope asked them.

"How 'bout we give the new parents their alone time, eh?" Rossi suggested as he herded them all towards the door.

Hotch handed Jack his backpack with his overnight clothes and gave him a hug. "Bye buddy, I'll come pick you up around lunchtime."

"Love you, Bud." Beth gave him a hug as well.

"Bye mom, bye dad." Jack waved goodbye as he left with JJ, Will, and Henry.

Hotch shut the door behind everyone and sighed with relief.

"What's that noise for?! You know you've missed them." Beth accosted him playfully.

"I think I've been seeing them too much in a personal setting and not enough in a work setting. They're getting too comfortable around me." Hotch joked but maintained a serious face.

Beth just smiled and shook her head at him. "Well you'll be back to no nonsense Agent Hotchner in no time but tonight you're still mine, Aaron."

Beth grabbed him by the belt and pulled him towards her before wrapping her arms around his neck and standing on her tiptoes to kiss him. She felt his hands come to either side of her waist before wrapping around her and pulling her up to more easily reach his lips.

"I love you" Beth murmured against his lips in-between kisses. "Like really really really love you."

With an infant latched onto her boob for 50% of the day she hadn't exactly been craving any extra physical touch but in this moment she remembered how good it felt to be loved by Hotch. His strong arms around her waist pulling her closer to him like she was nothing, his soft lips and scratchy face against hers was the perfect juxtaposition and it felt oh so good.

Beth started to feel frantic in her need to get closer to him. She unwrapped her legs from around his waist and set her feet back on the floor before she started furiously unbuttoning his shirt.

"Beth…" Hotch began to say hesitantly.

"Take a shower with me?" Beth asked, cutting him off before he could go any further.

Hotch nodded his head in agreement and Beth led them upstairs. Passing by the bassinet Beth quickly assessed that Luna was still sound asleep before pulling Hotch into the bathroom and shutting the door. She turned on the shower heads and let the water heat up while she finished undressing Hotch. Soon his shirt was off, his pants and briefs were at his ankles, and she had a lot of catching up to do.

Beth took a steadying breath before raising her arms above her head making it easier for Hotch to remove her shirt. She hadn't been shy about her postpartum body but she hadn't exactly shown it off either. But here they were in the well-lit bathroom about to stand naked in front of each other for the first time since welcoming a new baby and Beth couldn't help but feel a twinge of self-consciousness with her body. She closed her eyes and felt Hotch's hands at the brim of her shirt before slowly lifting it above her head then reaching around her back to unclasp her bra.

"I leak like crazy in the shower, sorry in advance."

Hotch gently touched his lips to hers. "You don't have to be sorry about anything."

Beth pressed her lips against his again as she removed her pants and underwear and kicked them to the side. She focused on kissing him but couldn't help but notice that her stomach felt softer against his than she was used to and she hadn't gotten waxed since before she had given birth. It was all she could do to not call the whole thing off and run back into the bedroom and put on her largest sweats and coziest sweatshirt.

"I think the water is hot." Hotch softly whispered.

Beth opened her eyes and saw him looking at her with nothing but love. She knew she was way overthinking this.

He held the shower door open for her and the water was the perfect temperature; it seemed to melt away whatever self-conscious doubts she was holding on to. She smiled at him as he followed her into the shower. He stood under his stream of water but Beth abandoned hers to kiss him again. She sucked on his lower lip - she truly felt like she couldn't get enough and as she felt him against her stomach she could tell that he wasn't getting enough either.

"Beth, it's just two more weeks." He reminded her not really sounding like he could make it two more weeks.

"I don't plan on breaking any of the rules. Don't worry," she smirked at him.

Beth ran her hands down his chest and stroked him a few times and the groan that came out of Hotch's mouth made Beth irrationally happy. Slowly she sank to her knees and came face to face with a part of him that she hadn't been able to enjoy in over four weeks. She gave him a few long licks before placing the tip into her mouth. She played with the spongy head in her mouth with her tongue and Hotch's moans got louder. She had missed hearing him make these noises.

"Beth, you really don't have to."

She removed him from her mouth to shush him.

"I want to. So just be quiet and enjoy it."

Hotch shut his eyes and let his head fall back and she resumed sucking and licking on his tip while her hands began to massage his balls. Throughout the process she kept switching up her technique. Sucking on the head, engulfing him in her mouth, stroking him, licking him, playing with his balls. She kept him on edge for nearly longer than he could handle.

"Fuck. Beth, please. I'm so close."

She decided to stop toying with him and let him finish. Her knees were starting to hurt on the tile anyway. She gave him his favorite combo: sucking on the tip while stroking his shaft and rolling his testicles between her fingers. After doing this for a few moments he lost all control and groaned her name as he spilled himself into the back of her throat. She eased off of him slowly as he came down from his high. Beth had underestimated how much hearing those sounds from Hotch would turn her on, she would give anything to be able to bed him right then but she knew Hotch would never break the rules if it could potentially hurt her.

"God, you're amazing." Hotch told her as he helped lift her to her feet. "You really didn't have to, can I repay the favor?"

Beth just smiled at him. "In two weeks for sure, I have no idea what's going on down there right now. Besides, tonight was all for you. I want you to miss me a bit when you're back at work."

"A bit? It will be a miracle if I can think of anything but you!" He assured her. "Come on let's finish showering."

Beth reluctantly agreed and stepped back under her stream of water to wash her hair and body before they got out and got dried off. When they opened the door to their bedroom Luna was still soundly sleeping in her bassinet.

"Do you think there is a way I can subtly ask JJ if she'd take Jack for a sleepover again in two weeks?" Hotch asked her.

"I don't care who you ask and I don't care if it's subtle just make it happen. Think we can convince anyone to take Lu too? Just for a few hours?" Beth joked.

"Who are we kidding? We'll be lucky if I'm not out on a case when we hit the six week mark."

"True, I guess we shouldn't get too greedy. Although if you're gone I'm just going to take matters into my own hands."

"You're telling me you can make it 6 weeks without sex and then at your first opportunity you'd rather replace me with a vibrator than wait an extra day or two? Man that one hurts."

"Guess you better make sure you're home so we don't find out." Beth giggled at him.

Hotch rolled his eyes at her and Beth just laughed even harder. He was truly wondering how he would ever find the motivation to go back to work. Tomorrow was his last Sunday before returning to work and it had come so much faster than he expected. All he knew for sure was he wasn't taking any of this for granted.


	21. Chapter 21

October 27th, 2013 - 4 weeks old

Beth glanced over from the bathroom into their bedroom. Hotch was laying in bed with Luna on his chest talking on the phone. He was using his work voice and Beth was once again reminded that after 7 glorious weeks of having him home for dinner every night he was going back out into the field. Which meant nights apart, trying not to stress about what dangerous situations he was putting himself in, and now; taking care of two children by herself.

"Thanks JJ, see you tomorrow." She heard him say as he ended the call as she came out of the bathroom.

"Everything okay?" she asked him.

Hotch just nodded. "We have a case but it can wait until the morning. We fly out at 8 so I won't be here to get Jack on the bus but his lunch is packed and in the fridge and he already picked out his clothes. I can see if Jessie will come over in the morning?"

"We'll be fine, Aaron. Or maybe we won't be but I gotta figure this out eventually, right?"

"You'll definitely be fine, just know she's around if you want an extra set of hands."

"Are you sure you don't want to sleep in the guestroom tonight? It's your first day back at work and you're immediately flying out for a case. I don't want you exhausted." Hotch was a light sleeper and woke every time Luna made a noise, Beth worried about him.

"I don't want to sleep away from you or Luna. I promise I'll be fine. There's worse things to be than tired. Come to bed it's getting late."

Beth glanced at the clock. It was nearing 10:30 and she was exhausted. It had been unseasonably warm and they had spent the afternoon having a picnic in the park and Jack had played with his friends. Beth gently extracted Luna from Aaron's chest and placed her in the bassinet before crawling into bed to fall asleep herself.

She heard the crying and was trying to open her eyes but exhaustion made it seem impossible. The darkness underneath her eyes lightened as Hotch flipped on the bedside lamp and Beth groaned. Luna got louder and finally her eyes unglued themselves from each other. The alarm clock was fuzzy but she could make out the "12". It wasn't even 1 AM yet.

"What the heck, Lu?" Beth groaned as she reached for the babe who had been persistent in her crying.

She latched the baby on and tried not to let her eyes drift back shut as the baby nursed. "Turn the light off and go back to sleep, Aaron."

"You need to be able to see," he countered.

"I have my phone right here if I need a light. Please go back to sleep." She urged him before he finally gave in and switched off the light.

Beth in fact did use her phone to scroll social media as she attempted to stay awake knowing that if she sat there in the dark soon she would fall asleep with the baby on top of her and Aaron would disapprove. Finally after 20 minutes the suckling ceased and Beth gently re-swaddled the baby before placing her back in the bassinet and immediately falling back asleep herself.

"Beth, Beth wake up. She's hungry again."

Beth reluctantly opened her eyes again. Hotch was standing next to the bed with a squirming baby in his arms. She glanced at the alarm clock; 2:23 AM. What the fuck.

"Why is she awake? Why are you awake?" She asked as she reached for the baby and latched her on yet again.

"I heard her fussing. I knew she had just eaten so I tried to settle her but she didn't want to be settled. She wanted to eat."

"Aaron go get some sleep in the guest room. You have to be awake in 4 hours and you haven't gotten any rest."

He just ignored her and climbed back into his side of the bed,

"Aaron I'm serious."

"If she wakes up again I'll go to the guest room but Beth, trust me to know my limits. I'm fine."

"Aaron, between this family and your job you would work yourself to death if I let you. You're still human, you need sleep."

Hotch turned off the light again and continued to ignore her as he laid back down on his side of the bed. Beth just rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to the baby.

"Lulu, you need to sleep. You can't keep doing this to us." She whispered to the baby who seemed perfectly content to nurse all night long.

After a short feed Luna was back asleep and Beth once again placed her back in the bassinet before drifting back off to sleep herself praying it would be the last time she awoke before Hotch's alarm.

"Daddy, Daddy." Beth could not believe their shit luck as she heard Jack's quiet voice from Hotch's side of the bed. She could count the times that Jack came into their room in the middle of the night on one hand.

"Buddy it's 4 in the morning what do you need?" Hotch asked his son his voice as calm and patient as ever even though Beth felt like she was going to explode from exhaustion and frustration.

"I had a really bad dream. Can I sleep with you guys?" He asked softly.

Just as Hotch was about to answer his son, Luna began to cry. Again. Beth opened her eyes and audibly groaned.

"This is worse than when she was a newborn!" Beth exclaimed.

"Buddy, Lulu is having a rough night. Why don't you go back to your room and I'll be there in just a minute, okay?'

Jack nodded and ran back to his room.

Hotch was stuck between a rock and a hard place. He wanted to help Beth but he knew trying to help her would make her even more frustrated. But it felt wrong to leave her to fend for herself.

"Go sleep with Jack in his room." She ordered him. "You'll both sleep better in there than you will in here."

"I'll come wake you up before I leave?"

"I'm sure I'll be up but if not then sure."

Hotch left the room and she sighed at the baby who was yet again nursing. She was terrified about Hotch going back into the field on such little sleep but was also irrationally annoyed with him for refusing to sleep in the guest room. She tried to remind herself that he had worked under worse conditions and he had managed to do just fine before she entered the picture. She didn't want to be angry with him but the exhaustion and hormones were giving her little choice over her emotions.

She tried taking meditative breaths while Luna ate but it did little to quell her annoyance and just made her sleepier. So instead she went back to mindlessly scrolling facebook while she waited for her daughter to be done. Finally she changed her diaper, re-swaddled her again, and laid her down for what she hoped would be the last time before dawn.

Beth awoke but for once not to the sound of a crying baby. She felt Aaron's lips on her forehead. As exhausted as she still was it was a nice change to not wake up to crying.

"What time is it?" She asked him groggily.

"7:15 - I didn't want to wake you but I really have to go to work. Jack's getting dressed and his backpack is all packed and ready to go."

Beth nodded her head and sleepily got herself out of bed and into Hotch's arms.

"Did you sleep okay with Jack?" She asked him, her face buried in his neck.

"Out like a light. Don't worry about me, okay? Just worry about keeping these two hooligans alive and call me tonight when you have a chance."

She just nodded, her head still on his shoulder and her arms around his waist. She could feel the tears starting to stream and so could he.

"Hey, please don't cry," she could hear the pain in his voice.

Hotch pulled her back so that she was facing him and he quickly wiped the tears from her face.

"I really have to go. I waited too long to wake you up. Please tell me you'll be okay?" Hotch sounded and looked utterly conflicted.

"We'll be fine, I promise." She nodded her head to seem more confident than she was. "You can go, I don't want you to be late."

Hotch pulled her back in for a goodbye kiss. He captured her bottom lip between his and held her body close to his, running his hands up and down her back. Beth kept her hands on either side of his face before pulling herself away from him.

"Go. You're going to be late."

With that he nodded and ran back down the stairs shouting his final goodbye to Jack as he went.

Beth took a deep breath and tried to pull herself together. Just as she started to feel like maybe she could get a handle on things Luna started crying. Again.

"How was the day? Did it go okay?" Hotch asked her over the phone. He was still at the precinct in Phoenix but knew he had to take a break if he wanted a chance to talk to Beth before she went to bed.

"Not really but everyone is alive so I'm calling it a win."

"I'm sorry. The first day's the hardest, right?" He tried to sound reassuring over the phone.

"I hope so. Luna pretty much decided that if she wasn't being held she was going to cry so it was impossible to get anything done and she refused to nap for longer than 30 minutes so that meant a nap for me also went out the window. But luckily Jack was cool with frozen pizza for dinner and he did his homework and went to bed without arguing. Now I'm tickling our baby in the armpit to keep her awake as she nurses. I'm hoping if she gets a good feed in before bedtime she'll sleep better tonight. How are things at work? Are you back at your hotel?"

"No but we'll probably head back soon. There's a 2 hour time change so it's not as late here."

"The time change means nothing if you're not acclimated to it. Do you think you'll get to come home tomorrow?"

Hotch sighed into the phone. "Probably not. I don't know. It's hard to tell how this case will go."

"Okay well promise me you'll try and get some sleep tonight. You need it and this is your chance to rest uninterrupted."

"I promise. Not gonna lie there is a very small part of me that is excited to go to sleep knowing there won't be a baby waking me up. Most of me just really wants to be home with you guys though."

Beth chuckled. "There's a very large part of me that envies you and your hotel room tonight. But we're both where we are needed. Well the tickling is no longer working and Luna is officially asleep. Pray that she sleeps longer than 3 hours. I love you."

"I love you too. Tell Jack I'm sorry I couldn't say goodnight to him and that if I can't come home tomorrow I'll make sure to talk to him before bed tomorrow."

"Will do - goodnight, Aaron."


	22. Chapter 22

November 10th, 2013 - 6 weeks old

"She finished it! All four ounces. She's killing this bottle thing." Hotch announced proudly while carrying a drowsy Luna into the living room.

"Aw what a good girl. I'm almost done pumping and then I can put her down."

Over the last two weeks they had slowly started introducing bottles to Luna and while it had been initially a rocky transition she was starting to get the hang of them. Beth was ready to not be the sole person responsible for feeding her but that being said pumping wasn't exactly the most appealing alternative. It was hard to believe she was halfway through her maternity leave and in another 6 weeks she would have to go back to work as well. She knew she was lucky to be able to only go back part time but she was still dreading it. She wanted to make sure she had a stockpile of frozen breastmilk and that Luna would easily take a bottle by the time she went back to work making the transition as easy as possible.

The pump automatically turned off and she carefully disassembled the parts to be washed and placed the bags of milk in the freezer before stealing the baby back from Hotch.

"Gosh it's so dumb I literally miss her when you're in the next room feeding her. Like I want some separation but also the second she's out of my arms I want her back again. I know I sound crazy."

"You sound like a mom," Hotch smiled at her. "It's hard because she won't take a bottle when she can sense you around but she'll get the hang of it soon enough."

"I'm sure you're right. I'm going to put her down and then tell Jack lights out."

"It's 9 PM he should already be in bed." Hotch stated questioningly.

"He may have suckered me into allowing him to read for a little bit. He asked so nicely!"

Hotch just laughed at her. "Well you can pull him out of bed in the morning when he refuses to get up for school."

"Ugh deal." Beth agreed before taking the baby upstairs.

She changed her diaper and put her in her PJ's before relaxing in the rocking chair to snuggle her for a few minutes. Jack knocked lightly on the door to the nursery before walking in.

"I thought you were reading?"

Jack shrugged. "I was but I finished the chapter and I heard you in here with Luna. Can I say goodnight to her?"

"Sure, bud." Beth got out of the rocking chair and Jack took her place. Beth gently laid Luna into his arms and she didn't seem to mind the transition too much in her sleepy state.

"You're a good big brother, you know that?" Beth told him.

Jack just shrugged again. "I don't really know how to be a big brother."

"I don't really know how to be a mom but I think we're doing alright. Just lots of love, right? Can't be too hard."

"I see bedtime is going well for everyone." Hotch piped in from the door shaking his head in faux disapproval. "Let me guess, he asked nicely."

Beth just laughed and Hotch came into the nursery to sit next to Beth on the floor. He couldn't help but stare at his son holding Luna. Jack had held Luna dozens of times over the last 6 weeks but he was still in awe every time and was so glad that Jack got the opportunity to be a big brother.

Hotch draped his arm around Beth's shoulders and pulled her in to kiss her temple. Beth smiled at the feel of Hotch's lips on her skin and turned to kiss him on the lips.

"You guys are gross," Jack exclaimed, not hiding the look of disgust on his face.

"Well since it's past your bedtime why don't you go to bed so that we can be gross in private, huh?" Hotch questioned him jokingly. "Seriously bud, you have school tomorrow. It's time to get some rest."

"Okay." Jack said reluctantly as he gave the baby back to Beth. "Good night."

"Night Jack, love you!" Called Beth as she swaddled Luna in a blanket.

"I'm going to hop in the shower," Hotch told her as he leaned in to kiss her cheek.

Beth carried the baby into the master bedroom and laid her in the bassinet next to her side of the bed. Luna still woke up usually 1-2x a night but Beth was finally starting to feel human again. Less sleep deprived and a little bit more herself. Tomorrow Luna would be 6 weeks old and she would have her 6 week postpartum OB visit and she was 90% excited and 10% terrified. She had her first wax appointment the week prior and it had been months - afterwards she had used a mirror to scope out the situation and despite all she had been through everything surprisingly looked the same. She couldn't tell where the stitches had dissolved and if you didn't know any better you never would have guessed that just 6 weeks ago an 8 and a half pound baby had plowed her way out. Still Beth was nervous despite knowing she had absolutely no reason to be; Aaron had never made her feel the slightest bit uncomfortable in the bedroom.

Beth pushed the thoughts aside and changed into her PJ's before getting under the covers of the bed and grabbing the book she had been slowly making her way through. She hadn't even read an entire page when she heard the shower turn off. Shortly after Hotch made his way out of the bathroom wearing only a towel loosely draped around his hips and her percentages changed from 100% excited and 0% terrified. She was ready and she was ready now.

"God dammit, Hotchner. Just one more night! Then you can be as sexy as you want! But I can not handle this tonight!"

Hotch chuckled. "Close your eyes and I'll throw some of my least sexy pajamas on."

"Orrrrrrrr we say fuck it and have sex tonight because what's really going to change in the next 15 hours?" Beth pleaded.

"We've waited this long, we can wait another day. It's not worth it if your body's not ready yet and it hurts you." Hotch's tone was adamant and Beth knew he wouldn't budge. Still she tried.

"I'm obviously going to tell you if it hurts. Aaron, please! For all we know you'll be called away on a case tomorrow."

Hotch quickly finished getting his pajamas on and settled into bed next to Beth. He rolled onto his side to face her.

"I can't promise you I won't be called away tomorrow, but we have tons of work to do at Quantico so unless it's urgent I will be home tomorrow night. I just can't rationalize hurting you when in less than 24 hours we'll have the official okay. I know that tomorrow it might still not be perfect and that's okay we can stop but at least then I'll know that I'm not hurting you because I couldn't keep myself under control for one extra day."

He looked so sincere in his words and Beth could tell that he truly wouldn't enjoy doing anything until he knew she had officially been cleared for sexual activity.

"You better be home tomorrow," was all she said in response.

Hotch smiled. "Your appointment is at 1, right? Do you and Luna want to come have lunch with me before your appointment?"

"That sounds lovely. I can pick up sandwiches from that deli you like?"

"Perfect. Did you want me to ask JJ about watching Jack tomorrow night?"

"No, it's okay. It's a school night and he's not exactly the child I'm worried about interrupting us anyway."

Hotch nodded in agreement and they both read their books before falling asleep.

XXX

*Thanks for bringing lunch. Garcia won't stop talking about how you should bring Luna everyday. I can't say I disagree with her. Let me know how everything goes with your appointment.*

Beth opened the text from Hotch while in the waiting room of the OB office and smiled. Luna was sleeping in her carseat clearly worn out from being passed around to all the different profilers.

*Still waiting to be seen. Lou is currently passed out from her very busy day. We loved seeing you and will bring you lunch any day of the week ;)*

"Elizabeth Clemmons?" Beth stood at the mention of her name.

The medical assistant motioned for her to follow so Beth grabbed the carseat and followed her into the exam room. They did all the normal things like take her vital signs and weigh her before leaving her alone to change into the gown.

After a few minutes of waiting there was a knock at the door and her midwife came into the room.

"Beth! It's so good to see you. You look well, how do you feel?"

"I feel good, thanks! She's starting to sleep a bit more and I feel like we're slowly getting the hang of each other."

"How is breastfeeding going?"

"It's going well - we just started introducing a bottle a couple weeks ago to help her get the hang of it. She only gets a few a week when my partner is home in the evenings but it's been nice."

"And do you have a plan for birth control?"

Her midwife, Sue, continued to ask her questions about her recovery and Luna and how she was coping with everything. It felt good to have validation from a professional that everything she was experiencing was normal.

"Well should we take a look and see how everything is healing?" Sue asked her.

Beth nodded and scooched herself down to the bottom of the exam table and placed her feet in the foot rests. This position never got any less awkward.

"You're just going to feel my touch as I examine everything, okay?"

"Okay," Beth agreed and stared at the ceiling as Sue did what she had to do.

"Well everything healed up exactly as we would expect it to! I don't see anything that would suggest you can't resume your normal sexual activities. Sometimes the scar tissue can be sensitive the first few times as it stretches and that should go away with time. Nothing should be extremely uncomfortable or painful so please stop if that is the case and make an appointment to come be re-evaluated. Now, just because you're physically cleared for sex doesn't always mean mentally you're ready so go at your own pace, okay?"

Beth smiled at her. "I will, thank you!"

"Well unless you have any more questions you're free to go, dear."

Beth just shook her head and waited until Sue had left the room before changing back into her own clothes. As she checked out and carried Luna back to the car she woke up and began to cry.

Beth got her carseat situated in the backseat before unstrapping Luna and sitting with her in the driver's seat. She pulled up her shirt and let the baby latch on. They were now pro's at nursing and Beth was able to keep one hand free so she texted Hotch.

*Midwife says everything looks good and we're cleared for whatever we want to do :) Currently feeding Luna in the car and then going to go home to get dinner in the crockpot. Potato soup sound okay to you?

*Glad to hear it. Potato soup sounds great. See you later.*

Beth finished feeding Luna before strapping her back in the carseat and headed for home.

XXX

"I just checked on Jack. He's out cold." Hotch said as he entered the bedroom.

"I was thinking we should put Luna in her crib? We can bring her back into her bassinet once we're done, it just seems weird to have her in here while we're doing it?"

"Sounds like a good plan."

Beth stood up with the milk drunk baby and carried her into her nursery before laying her in her crib and turning on the baby monitor. She rubbed her back until her eyes drifted shut.

"Night, sweet Lou." She whispered to the baby.

She walked back into the bedroom and Hotch was waiting for her shirtless in bed. She happily moved in next to him and ran her hand over his chest before bringing her lips to his.

She kissed him passionately and thoroughly, finally not having to restrain herself. He tasted like minty toothpaste and smelled faintly like the cologne he had applied that morning. She ran her hand up and down his bare chest before letting it slip under the elastic of his boxer briefs.

Hotch sat up and pulled her hand out of his underwear.

"Shhhh I want to go slow. And I don't want this to be about me." He said to her as he pushed her onto her back and laid on top of her careful not to apply too much of his weight against her.

Beth groaned but didn't argue with him. He rejoined their lips and skillfully used his tongue while his hands roamed down her sides and back up underneath her shirt. He stopped kissing her long enough to remove the shirt entirely before starting to kiss her neck instead. His warm breath and wet kisses against her sensitive skin was driving her mad. She groaned but he ignored her and moved onto her chest kissing down the valley in between her breasts.

"Bra on or off?" He asked her.

"Huh?" She asked, too dazed to comprehend what he was asking her.

He repeated himself.

"On, I guess. Or else I'll leak everywhere."

He nodded and continued to move his kisses downward. He spent a considerable amount of time on her abdomen kissing and licking her ticklish spots. It felt heavenly yet she couldn't control her giggles when he'd tease a particularly sensitive area. After flicking his tongue in and out of her belly button several times he made his way further south and kissed alongside the waistband of her pajama bottoms. He frustratingly trailed his lips back and forth.

"Aaron we have the rest of our lives for teasing, now is not the time." She begged him.

He seemingly ignored her and kept up his teasing with light kisses and licks.

"I swear to god Aaron if I don't orgasm before the baby wakes up there will be hell to pay." She groaned.

He gave her a small chuckle but must have agreed because he finally looped his thumbs into her underwear and pajama pants and pulled them down her legs as she lifted her butt off the bed.

He kissed up the inside of her thigh slowly spreading her legs wider before he finally reached the place she had been yearning for him to be. He gave her one long lick and she sighed in contentment. He parted her with his tongue and gently sucked on her clit. Beth wrapped her fingers into the short hair at the nape of his neck and pushed him further into her. He stopped sucking and went back to exploring her with his tongue. It had been too long since he had last done this and he wanted to re-explore every inch of her.

"Aaron, please." She moaned.

He was playing with fire. At any moment the baby could cry and they would have to stop and Beth would never let him live it down. He eased two fingers into her and settled back in on her clit. He gently curled his fingers up against her G-spot as he started sucking once more. He got himself into a rhythm and soon Beth was starting to lose it underneath him. Her hands got frantic on the back of his head, her toes were curling uncontrollably, and she kept attempting to shift her hips underneath him but he kept them pinned firmly in place. He continued to suck on her clit until she finally let go and nearly screamed out her orgasm. She quickly placed a pillow over her head to soften her screams as she clenched herself around Hotch's fingers effectively drenching them with her fluids. As she caught her breath and her trembling began to cease he pulled his fingers out of her. He gave her one final lick to get a last taste and she whimpered as he touched her sensitive clit.

He moved himself back up her body giving her random kisses as he went. At this point he had been sporting a raging hard on for way too long and he knew he needed relief. He buried his face into her neck before grinding himself against her warmth. He groaned at the feeling. He reluctantly pulled away from her to sit up and reach into the bedside table and pull out a condom. Ripping it open with his teeth he quickly rolled it over himself and returned to his original position hovering over top of her.

"You ready, baby?" He asked her.

Beth nodded agreeingly. "Go easy on me."

Hotch looked her in the eyes and felt astonished by the love he saw in them. Every day he wondered how he got so lucky as to find her. He captured her lips with his and kissed her as he lined himself up at her entrance. He kept their lips joined as he slowly entered for her the first time in what felt like an eternity. They moaned into each other's mouth and soon Hotch was fully inside of her.

"Are you okay?" He asked her. Not willing to move a muscle until she gave the okay.

"I'm fine, keep going." She encouraged him.

So he did. Slowly but surely he pulled out before moving himself back in. He picked up the pace a little bit with each stroke carefully watching her face for any signs of distress. He found none - her eyes were closed and she was arching her back against the sheets bringing her body closer to his. Finally he decided to let go and go for it. He groaned as he moved quickly in and out of her and she wrapped her arms around him squeezing his butt as he moved.

It had been too long and Hotch could feel himself nearing climax before he was ready. He wanted to make this last his body just wasn't cooperating with him. He knew he had to do something to take her over the edge sooner but he couldn't get good access to her clit without changing their position, she however had the perfect angle.

He brought his lips to her ear. "Touch yourself for me."

Beth moaned and slowly dragged her nails across his buttocks and around his side before letting her hand move down to her clit. It was still swollen and sensitive from his earlier ministrations. She lightly traced circles around it and she whimpered in pleasure.

Hotch's groaning got more frequent and his strokes got more erratic.

"Babe. I'm not gonna last." As soon as the words were out of his mouth he moaned in orgasm. Emptying himself into the condom. Beth kept up her work on her clit and soon she was over the edge herself moaning into Hotch's ear as he lay his head on her shoulder.

They caught their breaths for a moment before Hotch slowly pulled out of her and removed the condom before tying it in a knot and tossing it in the trash. He laid himself on his back and pulled Beth so that she laid partially on top of him.

"We've still got it." She murmured as she ran her hand across his bare chest. She had missed sex, that she knew, but she hadn't realized how much she had also missed this. The after sex moments of basking in each others sweaty arms. Too blissful and dazed to get up quite yet. She always felt safe and warm in his arms and tonight was no exception. Beth moved in and placed a kiss on his neck, right at his pulse point.

"I love you."

"I love you too," he told her.


	23. Chapter 23

November 13th, 2013 - 7 weeks old

Beth was just finishing up loading the dishwasher when her phone rang. She dried off her hands and peeked at the baby monitor to make sure Luna was still sleeping before answering it.

"Hello, this is Beth."

"Miss. Clemmons, this is Sally Jones. I'm the school nurse at Watson Elementary. We have you on file as the second person to call regarding Jack Hotchner if his father does not pick up."

"Yes, that is correct. Is Jack sick?"

"No, unfortunately Jack fell off the monkey bars at recess and injured his arm. We believe he might need to go to the hospital."

"Okay, uhh do I meet you there or do I need to come pick him up?" Beth started to gather her belongings feeling frazzled.

"We can call an ambulance if you like but if you would prefer to take him yourself that is fine too."

"Uhm no, don't call an ambulance I'll be right there."

Beth scrambled to get her purse together and ran upstairs to grab Luna. The infant screamed at being awoken from her nap and being hastily clipped into her carseat. Beth tried to console her with her favorite blanket and pacifier but Luna wasn't having any of it. Beth finally sighed and put the carseat in the car with Luna still screaming inside. She drove quickly to the elementary school worried that Jack was in pain and wondering why Hotch wouldn't have answered. She tried calling him again but it went straight to voicemail.

She pulled into the parking spot closest to the front office and grabbed Luna's carseat from the back. She had cried the entire drive and it was making Beth feel even more on edge - Luna rarely cried and it was making her feel like a terrible mother, but she knew Jack needed her more right now. Rushing to the front desk she found Jack sitting in one of the chairs cradling his left arm against his chest. His cheeks were red and tear-stained and looking at him broke her heart. She set down the carseat and went to him gently pulling him in for a hug, careful not to jostle his already swollen and bruised arm.

"Let's go get that arm looked at, okay?" She asked him softly.

Jack just nodded in response, tears still slowly streaming from his eyes.

"If you wouldn't mind just signing him out on this sheet here, please" the secretary asked her, gesturing to the signout sheet.

Beth quickly scribbled Jack's name and her signature before picking up the carseat again and leading Jack out to the car.

She opened up the car door for him first and helped him get buckled into his booster seat.

"I know it hurts buddy, we're going to go to the hospital so they can help it feel better."

"Do you think I'll have to get a cast?" Jack asked, his voice quivering.

"Maybe, bud, I don't know for sure."

"Can I talk to dad?"

"He's not picking up the phone but I'll keep trying to call him, okay?"

Jack nodded again and Beth gently shut the car door before going around to put Luna's carseat in the base. Beth made a futile attempt to stick her pacifier in her mouth in hopes that it would calm her down but it didn't work.

"It's okay Lulu, it's okay." Jack reached over with his uninjured arm to re-insert the pacifier in her mouth and stroke Luna's hair.

Beth started to drive and was touched by the compassion Jack showed to his baby sister when he was the one who was injured. He was his fathers son, no doubt about that.

They made it to the ER and thankfully Luna had calmed down and Jack was somehow holding it together despite the gruesome sight that was his left arm. Just looking at it made Beth want to cry and she could tell that Jack was in pain. She got them checked into the ER and thankfully there wasn't a wait on a Wednesday afternoon. They initially gave her some hassle regarding her not being Jack's parent but she explained the situation and they finally agreed to let her go back with him. There was a bit of commotion as the nurse and doctor took his vitals and assessed his arm. Both Jack and Luna started crying again at the whirlwind of activity. Beth tried to keep her composure despite feeling thoroughly overwhelmed. She had called Hotch two more times and he still wasn't answering which also worried her but she couldn't bear to worry about one more thing just then.

Beth unstrapped Luna from her carseat and tried to discreetly latch her on amongst the chaos. She threw a blanket over the baby once she was happily eating and scooched her chair next to the head of the stretcher Jack was on so she could hold his hand. She felt kind of bad that she was a bit in the way but she would have felt worse if she couldn't comfort Jack.

"It's okay buddy, they're going to help you feel better. I'm right here, Jack."

Jack squeezed her hand and took noisy deep breaths.

"Here Jack, this is some pain medication and it will help you feel better while we look at your arm." The nurse handed him a medicine cup half full of bright pink liquid.

Jack swallowed it quickly and made a disgusted face.

"Can I have some water?" Jack asked.

"Let's take a better look at that arm and then we can decide if you can eat or drink something. We're going to do an X-Ray so that we can see the bone in your arm and we'll know where and how badly it's broken." The doctor explained to him.

"So you do think it's broken?" Beth confirmed with him.

"Based on what I am currently seeing that is my assumption but we'll know for sure soon. The X-Ray machine should be here shortly."

"I want dad," Jack whimpered quietly.

"I know bud, I'll try calling him again."

Beth reluctantly removed her hand from his so that she could have a free hand to call Hotch, again it went straight to voicemail. She knew she could probably call Garcia and she would be able to track him down but she didn't have time for that. She needed him to answer his own damn phone. Finally she resorted to texting him in hopes that he would see it soon.

*I'm in the ER with Jack. They think he has a broken arm. Please call me back.*

As she slipped her phone back into her purse the X-Ray tech came in lugging a big machine.

"Don't worry, this won't hurt a bit. We're just going to take a picture of your arm!" The tech told him.

Jack looked at the machine hesitantly but she was grateful the pain medication seemed to be kicking in and he looked much less uncomfortable.

"Ma'am, I'll have you and the baby step out for just a minute while we do this to avoid radiation exposure."

"Mom, please don't leave!" Jack begged looking at her terrified.

"Can I stay while you get everything into position?" She asked and the tech nodded yes. "Okay bud, I'm right here. I'll just have to leave for a minute but I'll be right on the other side of that door waiting to come back in as soon as I can."

"Why do you have to go?" Jack cried.

"Baby Lou is too little for this machine. So I have to take her out for just a minute. But you have been so brave and I know you can do this without me. I know you're scared and that's okay just remember that it will be over soon. Try to hold really still so that they can get really good pictures."

Jack nodded and gingerly moved his arm into the position they needed under the X-Ray.

"I'm sorry ma'am, you have to step out now."

Beth kissed Jack's face. "I'll be right back."

She stood up and took Luna who was still blissfully eating outside the little ER room. They kept the curtain in front of the glass door open so that she could keep eye contact with him throughout the process. It took less than 5 minutes and she was let back in.

"I'm so proud of you, buddy. You were so brave."

They waited together in the ER and Beth let Jack watch YouTube videos on her phone. The break was confirmed and Jack got to pick the color of his cast, he chose blue. They gave him some more pain medication and sent in a prescription she would pick up on the way home. Finally more than 3 hours after arriving he was discharged and they were able to go home. She was exhausted and she still hadn't heard from Hotch. Now she was worried about him too.

She got both kids strapped safely into the car.

"Bud, you've had a rough day and I'm too tired to make dinner. Why don't you think about what you want me to pick up for dinner and I'm going to try and get a hold of your dad."

Jack nodded agreeing happily.

She called his number again and again it went straight to voicemail. Finally she resorted to calling Garcia. She answered on the first ring and Beth was relieved that her voice was as chipper as always.

"Penelope, I haven't been able to reach Aaron all day and it's really important. Do you know what's going on?"

"Oh goodness I'm so sorry! Hotch's phone got damaged out in the field and it isn't working anymore. He's been with Emily all day so we've been using her phone to keep in touch with him."

"God dammit, it wouldn't have killed him to tell me that? Will you please have him call me?"

"Of course, right away. I'm so sorry, Beth. I hope everything is okay."

"Don't apologize Penelope you're not the one who has anything to be sorry about."

She sighed as she hung up the phone. She was incredibly relieved to know that Hotch was alright but also incredibly pissed off that he had gone a whole day without telling his fiancee and woman taking care of his two kids how to get a hold of him.

"Mom, I think I want a happy meal for dinner!" Jack informed her.

"McDonalds sounds perfect, Jack. I think your dad is going to call soon so I'm going to wait here for just a couple of minutes. You can talk with him while we're driving to McDonalds, sound good?"

Jack nodded happily again. In a much better state with a cast on and pain meds in his system. Luna was snoozing peacefully in her carseat. She only had to wait barely a minute before her phone buzzed and Aaron's name popped up on her iPhone screen.

"Hey." Was all she could think to say.

"I'm so sorry." He breathed. "I don't know what I was thinking. It never crossed my mind that you wouldn't be able to reach me."

"Somehow that doesn't make me feel better." She told him flatly.

"Are you guys okay? Penelope said it was important."

"Jack broke his arm at recess today. He fell off the monkey bars. We're just leaving the ER now, he's got a cast and is feeling better. He's been asking to talk to you all day."

Beth knew that last bit didn't need to be added. All it would do was hurt him but she had been hurting and overwhelmed all day, he could take his fair share.

"Jesus. I'm so sorry, Beth. Truly I am. Is he okay? Are you okay?" She could hear the pain in his voice and she immediately regretted trying to make him feel worse.

"We're fine, everyone is fine. It's all over now and we're going to get some McDonald's for dinner. I'm going to keep him home from school tomorrow just to make sure he is feeling okay."

"Yeah, that's a good call. Thanks for being there for him. Can I talk to him?"

"Yeah, of course." Beth handed the phone to Jack and put the car in gear to drive away from the hospital and towards comfort food.

Jack and Hotch talked for a while before Jack handed the phone back to Beth.

"Hey, we're about to be at the drive-thru. Can I call you back later?"

"Yeah, I probably shouldn't tie up Prentiss's phone for too long anyway. Just know I'm really sorry, okay?"

"I know, how about you just call me back if and/or when you have time. If not we can talk tomorrow."

"Okay," Hotch sounded so defeated but Beth truly just didn't want to distract him or compromise his safety because he was too worried about missing another one of her calls.

"I love you. Really, we're okay." Beth assured him.

"I love you too."

Beth hung up the phone and got their food and then swung by the pharmacy to get Jack's pain meds. They made the short drive home and Beth easily agreed to let them eat dinner in front of the TV. They watched Finding Nemo and her, Jack, and Luna all fell asleep on the couch. Luna on her chest and Jack laying next to her. Beth only awoke when she felt the vibrations in her back pocket.

She glanced at the TV and noticed the end credits had been playing. She pulled out her phone and recognized Emily's number so she assumed it was Hotch.

"Hey," she answered groggily.

"Hey, did I wake you up?" Hotch asked her.

Beth glanced at the clock and noticed it was only 7:30, she couldn't have been asleep for more than 20 minutes. "We all fell asleep on the couch, it's been a long day."

"Well we wrapped up the case. We're gonna fly home tonight but it will probably be past midnight by the time I get home. You can leave him on the couch if you want. I'll carry him upstairs when I get home."

"I might do that, he looks so peaceful. When you get home will you give him more pain medication? It's on the kitchen counter and he'll be due for some. I want to make sure we stay on top of it so he doesn't wake up in pain."

"Yeah, that's a good plan. I'm really sorry I couldn't be there for you guys today."

"It's okay, Aaron. Next time just try to remember to tell me that your phone is broken. But we managed and all is well. Jack will be happy that you're coming home."

"I'm happy too, I didn't want to spend another night in the hotel."

"Travel safe, we love you."

"Love you guys too,"

Beth stood up and placed Luna in her swing. She covered Jack with a blanket and picked up around the living room. When Luna woke up for her bedtime feed she nursed her before changing her into pajamas and swaddling her in the bassinet. Luna easily fell back asleep and Beth took the time to take a hot shower. The pounding water and thick steam helping her decompress from the day's events. Finally, long after her skin was red from the hot water, she stepped out of the shower and dried off to get ready for bed. It was barely 9 PM but she happily climbed under the covers.

XXX

The flight from Seattle to Quantico seemed to be taking forever. Hotch was mentally and physically exhausted from the past 36 hours but couldn't seem to rest. He knew he needed to see his family and then he would be able to relax enough to fall asleep. Checking his watch he counted down the minutes until they landed.

Finally he opened the garage door and walked into his home. It was warm and familiar. He walked towards the sectional in the living room and found Jack still asleep curled under the blanket, his blue casted arm against his chest. He wandered toward the kitchen and turned on a small light to find the prescription, he read the dosage carefully making sure to get the exact right amount before bringing it over to Jack's sleeping form.

"Jack, wake up. I've got some medicine for you." He whispered gently.

"Dad?" Jack asked sleepily, trying to peel open his eyes.

"Yeah, bud. It's me. Take some pain medication and then I'll carry you upstairs to bed." Hotch told him.

Jack swallowed the pain medication without a fuss and Hotch scooped him into his arms and carried him upstairs to his bedroom. He laid Jack down on the bed and covered him up with his blankets.

"I broke my arm, dad." Jack told him sleepily.

"I know, buddy. I'm so sorry I wasn't there. But I'm so proud of you for being so brave. Go back to sleep. I'll see you in the morning."

"Okay, dad." Jack mumbled as he laid his head back down on the pillow.

Hotch kissed his son on the head and walked towards his own bedroom. Luna was snoozing peacefully in her bassinet and Beth was curled up on her side of the bed sleeping as well. Quietly Hotch went to the bathroom to shower and change into pajamas before climbing into bed next to Beth. He kissed her shoulder blade before wrapping his arm around her and pulling their bodies closer together. He could feel Beth cuddle in against him.

"I missed you," she said dreamily.

"I missed you too. Go back to sleep."

Beth nodded and soon they were asleep in each other's arms.


	24. Chapter 24

November 27th, 2013 - 8 weeks old

Beth awoke to Hotch kissing her neck, the front of his body pressed up against her back, and she could distinctly feel _him _pressed up against her butt.

"Aaron," she groaned. "What time is it?"

His work alarm hadn't gone off yet which meant it was much too early. She usually stayed in bed through him getting ready and Luna's morning feed, only getting out of bed to say goodbye to Hotch and help get Jack ready for school.

"It's early. Sorry, I've just missed you."

Beth groaned again but she turned around into his arms anyway. She had missed him too.

He kept kissing her neck while Beth focused on pulling down their pajama pants under the covers. She got hers off all the way but was only able to get Hotch's down to mid-thigh. She didn't care, it was good enough.

"Do we need a condom?" He asked her.

"Midwife says we're good after 7 days of being on the pill. But Luna's still in here."

"We'll be quiet," Hotch assured her.

Beth tried to put it out of her mind as she felt him rub up against her. They still lay on their sides facing each other so Beth hitched her leg up on top of his to give them better leverage.

They were just getting things going when Luna started to cry from her bassinet near the bed. Hotch immediately stilled inside of her, neither of them anywhere close to fnishing. Instead of calming down Luna ramped up her crying and they groaned in unison. Hotch pulled out of her and they both pulled their pajama pants back up. Beth rolled over and pulled the baby from her bassinet to feed her before her screaming go any louder.

"Sorry," Hotch mumbled. "I should have known it was a bad idea."

He got out of bed and wandered to the shower to get ready for his workday.

November 29th, 2013

Hotch made it home and he was exhausted. It was only 9 PM but he had been away the past two nights on a case and the entire team had barely slept. It was a tough and stressful case and Hotch could feel the tension he was carrying. He rifled though the fridge looking for something easy to eat before passing out in bed.

"Hey," Beth said softly coming down the stairs.

"Hey," he replied.

"You okay? Seemed like you've been really busy the last two days."

"It was a tough one, I'm glad to be home." He told her.

"Can I make you something to eat?" She offered, wrapping her arms around his waist from behind she could feel that he was a giant ball of stress. She kissed him in between his shoulder blades trying to help him relax.

"That's okay. I'm just going to make a sandwich and then hop in the shower before going to bed. I'm exhausted."

She pulled out sandwich stuff for him and he assembled a sandwich before nearly inhaling it.

"I'll go get the water running so that your shower is hot," she told him as she headed back up the stairs.

He cleaned up from his late dinner before following her upstairs and into the steamy bathroom. He started to remove his clothes.

"Can I join you? Help you relax a little bit?"

"I don't care if you join me but I'm too tired to do anything, sorry."

Beth started removing her clothes and they entered the shower together. Beth gathered the loofah and body wash and started to wash his body for him. It felt good but soon her hand was focused lower.

"Beth, really. I'm too tired. I'm sorry, I just want to go to bed."

"Shh you don't have to do anything. Just let me help you relax, Hotchner."

Beth sunk to her knees and started toying with him more intentionally. She stroked him and placed him in her mouth. She sucked on him for a few moments but none of her usual tricks seemed to be working.

Finally Hotch sighed and reached down to grab her arms and pull her back up to her feet.

"Seriously, it's not going to work. I'm too tired, I'm just going to go to bed."

And with that he exited the shower and grabbed his towel to dry off leaving her stunned under the stream of the water.

Beth gave him time to finish getting ready for bed before exiting the shower herself. She climbed into bed next to him and they both went to sleep without saying a word.

November 30th, 2013

Beth awoke for once not to the sound of an alarm or a baby crying but to the soft sounds of the turning pages of a book. She stretched under the covers not ready to open her eyes.

"Morning," she heard Hotch's voice. "About last night… I'm really sorry."

Beth finally opened her eyes and looked at him, he was sitting up in bed reading a book.

"Why are you sorry? You told me you weren't in the mood, I should have believed you. I just felt bad that Luna interrupted us and then you were gone on a case and wanted to make it up to you."

Hotch took her hand and brought it up to his lips. "It wasn't that I didn't want to - trust me, babe. I always want to. But thats only happened to me once before and it was when I was overwhelmed and tired; just like I was last night. I was worried that would be the outcome and I wanted to avoid feeling embarrassed and frustrated."

"You shouldn't be embarrased. I'm embarrassed. Next time I'll listen to you, I'm really sorry. And I'm sorry you had a tough case, did you get enough sleep?"

"Slept like a rock," he assured her. "I just woke up 10 minutes ago. I would be up for a rain check if you are?"

Beth glanced at the clock. It was nearly 7 AM. "There's a good chance we'll get interrupted again."

"We can be quick. Worth the risk don't you think?"

Beth was skeptical but smiled at him anyway. She wanted the sense of normalcy that intimacy with him would bring. So she leaned into his body and placed her lips on his neck. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her on top of him enjoying the weight of her body on top of his. She ground her lower half into his and unlike last night she could feel his body responding to hers. Beth sat up to pull her top over her head when there was a rushed knock on the door.

"Dad! Can I come in? I can't find my Star Wars t-shirt!"

"Oh my god." Hotch groaned. "I take it back, it was not worth the risk."

"Can I come in?" Jack yelled, repeating himself.

Beth pulled her shirt back over her stomach and got out bed to open the bedroom door.

"I appreciate you remembering to knock before coming into our room but try not to yell, bud. Your sister is still sleeping."

Hotch piped in from the bed, hiding his problem under the covers. "What are you doing awake, Jack? It's not even 7 AM."

"I need to get ready to go over to Aiden's house. We're having a movie and pizza night, remember?" He informed his dad as if it was obvious.

"Yes, but dude. It's a movie and pizza _night._" Hotch reminded him emphasizing the night part of his statement. "I'm not dropping you off until 2PM. That's in 7 hours."

Jack looked defeated. "Well I just wanted to be ready."

Beth ruffled his hair. "I think your Star Wars shirt is in the dryer. Grab a laundry basket and get the clothes out. You can start folding them while I make french toast for breakfast."

"Okay!" Jack agreed before running downstairs to the laundry room.

Beth looked back at Hotch in despair. "We're never going to have sex again, are we?"

"It's not seeming likely, is it?" Hotch agreed.

"We don't have to pick him back up from Aiden's house until 8 and Lulu usually naps around 3. Maybe we can sneak something in?" She asked, hopeful.

Hotch just gave her a skeptical look and rolled out of bed. He walked around to the side of the bed with the bassinet and picked up Luna who was starting to stir.

"I'll get her changed and dressed while you get started on breakfast." Hotch kissed her cheek as he walked out of the bedroom and into the nursery.

XXX

"Be safe okay, no horsing around or else you could hurt your arm. Just watch the movie, eat some pizza, and have a good time." Beth informed Jack.

"I'll be careful, mom." He assured her.

Hotch and Beth had tried to remind him to be cautious of his casted arm at home but they had little control of his activities at school or at friends houses. It worried Beth because she did not want to spend another afternoon in the ER with two young children ever again.

"Love you, see you later tonight."

Hotch helped him into the car and they backed out of the garage. Not even 10 minutes later Beth was surprised to see Hotch was calling her.

"Hey, is everything okay?" She asked when she answered the phone.

"I need to go into work." he informed her. "I just dropped Jack off. I'm gonna run back to the house to grab my stuff quick but then unfortunately I have to report as soon as possible."

"Okay," she responded trying to not let disappointment seep into her tone as their afternoon together vanished into thin air. "Is there anything I can grab for you so it's ready when you get here?"

"No that's okay. It'll just take a minute. I just wanted go let you know."

"Alright, well I'll see you soon."

She hung up the phone and looked at the alert baby in her arms. "Well Lu, it's just me and you today."

Hotch came home in a whirlwind and grabbed everything he thought he might need.

"It's local so I should be home tonight but it might be late. Will you pick up Jack from Aiden's at 8? I know that interferes with Luna's bedtime so I can ask Jessie."

"Of course I'll pick him up, Aaron. Just be safe. I love you."

He kissed her briefly on the lips.

"I love you too."

With that he went out the door and so did her chance of having sex during nap time.


	25. Chapter 25

December 12, 2013 - 10 weeks old

Beth was lounging on the couch with a sleeping baby on her chest waiting for Jack's bus to drop him off from school when she felt her phone buzz. Glancing at the notification she saw it was from Hotch. He had been gone 3 nights on a case and it was the longest he had been away since Luna had been born. She was anxious for him to come home - being the only parent 24/7 had been exhausting and she sincerely hoped he would be home for the weekend.

*On our way home now. I should be home before bedtime. Please keep them up if you can. I've missed you all.*

Beth grinned at the good news and knew Jack would be happy as well.

*Sure thing - we've all missed you and will be excited to see you.*

She texted him back and heard the bus stop in front of their driveway. It was only a minute before Jack came running in the door, his cheeks pink from the cold.

"Hi, mom!"

"Hey, bud! How was school?"

"It was good, we learned about plants and how they make oxygen."

Jack hung up his winter coat and kicked off his boots before climbing up next to her on the couch.

"Can I watch SpongeBob?"

"How much homework do you have?"

"Not a lot. Just a math worksheet and practicing reading."

"Okay we can watch TV for a bit but then you're doing your math while I make dinner. And you can practice reading to your dad, Luna, and I at bedtime." He noticed right away.

"Dad's coming home?!" He asked excitedly.

"Yep, he should be home around bedtime so we'll get all ready for bed so that we can read once he gets here."

Jack settled in next to her, pleased to hear the good news. They relaxed and watched a couple of episodes of SpongeBob before Beth decided it was time to be productive.

"Alright, dude. Go get your homework. I'm gonna make spaghetti and meatballs for dinner."

"Just one more episode?" He asked hopefully.

"Not right now. You need to get your homework done."

Jack didn't argue and ran to pull his homework from his backpack. Beth felt proud of herself and the role of being a mother that she was growing into. Jack settled himself on the kitchen island and Beth put the baby in the swing. With both kids occupied momentarily she started boiling the pasta water.

Jack finished his math homework and they ate dinner together. They were sitting on the couch together trying to coax smiles from Luna when they both heard the familiar sound of the garage door opening.

"Dad's home!" Jack exclaimed and his excitement finally got the smile they had been hoping for from Luna.

Beth giggled. "Does that make you happy, Lu? Did you miss your dad?"

The baby continued to smile at them and Hotch entered the house.

Jack immediately ran to give him a hug and while Beth noticed how utterly sleep deprived he looked she could tell he was happy they were all still awake to greet him.

Beth pulled herself and the baby off the couch but hung back as Jack and Hotch still were greeting each other.

"Go run upstairs and pick out some books for tonight and I'll be up in a minute, okay?"

Jack nodded and ran up the stairs to his bedroom.

Hotch walked over to Beth and gave her a long hug before leaning back to kiss her.

"It's good to have you back, Hotchner." Beth told him when they broke off the kiss.

She handed him the baby. "She missed you. She'll smile occasionally for me and Jack but she definitely prefers smiling for you."

"Is that right, sweet Luna?" Hotch cooed at the baby as he kissed her multiple times on her cheeks. Immediately Luna gave him a big smile and Hotch grinned at her in return. "Gosh, I missed you guys."

Beth hugged him again. "We missed you too. Let's go read with Jack."

They followed Jack up to his room where he was patiently waiting in his bed with his books picked out. They sat on the end of his bed as Jack carefully sounded out the different words and diligently showed them the pictures to every page. Beth nursed Luna to sleep as they listened to Jack recount the adventures of the Bernstein Bears.

"Alright bud, you did a great job. I'm proud of you.'" Hotch told his son as he tucked him in and turned on the night light.

"Will you still be home tomorrow dad?"

"I hope so, Jack. Should just be a normal day in the office so I'll see you in the morning and I'll be home before dinner."

"Night, big man. We love you." Beth kissed him goodnight on the forehead and they gently shut his door on their way out.

Making their way to the master bedroom Beth placed Luna in the bassinet on her side of the bed. She hesitated before turning on the baby monitor.

"You seem exhausted. Why don't you just go to bed?" Beth suggested to him.

"I'm fine. I want to spend time with you." He argued.

"It's okay. I'm exhausted too. Our kids are exhausting!" She chuckled. "I'll lay in bed and read until I'm ready to fall asleep."

Hotch sighed and nodded. "I am exhausted. But I missed you and I hate that we're only spending 30 minutes together before I'm passed out."

"We'll enjoy our time together more if we get some rest. Hopefully tomorrow will be lowkey at the office and we can spend the weekend together as a family."

They brushed teeth and climbed into bed and Hotch nearly moaned in delight at being reunited with their bed. He felt his body sink into the mattress and the sheets had never felt softer after 3 nights of stiff hotel sheets. He knew he would be asleep within minutes so he took a moment and placed his hand on Beth's thigh under the blankets.

"I love you," he told her.

Beth lowered the book and smiled at him.

"I love you too."

Not long after Hotch's breathing grew deeper did Beth decide it was time for her to go to bed as well. It was barely 9 PM - motherhood was a whole different kind of wild. She removed her reading glasses and placed them and the book on the bedside table near the bassinet. She snuggled under the covers and let the rhythm of Hotch's breathing lull her to sleep.

XXX

At first Beth wasn't sure what had awoken her. It wasn't a baby crying but it was something. Then she heard it again. It was Aaron. He was mumbling in his sleep, she had never heard him sleep talk before. It quickly got louder and more frantic.

"No, please no. Please, not again. Please. No. No. No."

Those were the only words she could distinguish from his lips and then she heard a new word. One that crushed her soul.

"Haley," he gasped.

He sounded so desperate and it broke Beth's heart. He was reliving the worst day of his life. She wasn't sure the best way to wake him but she knew she couldn't let him go on like this.

"Aaron," she called gently. Grabbing onto his arm. His muscles were tensed under her touch.

"Aaron," she said, louder this time. "Aaron, wake up."

She started shaking his arm more vigorously but it wasn't seeming to have an effect. He just kept mumbling the same words over and over again, his body was tense and starting to thrash. Finally she pulled the covers off their bodies and climbed on top of him. Her legs straddled over his hips and each hand grasping his arm. He was much stronger than her and could easily throw her off but before he had the chance she nearly shouted his name.

"Aaron!"

His eyes flew open and Beth watched as he struggled to reorient himself to reality in their dark bedroom.

"You were having a bad dream," she said gently even though she was sure he already knew.

She relaxed her grip on his arms and they came up to wrap around her pulling her body to his. He rolled them so she was beneath him and he buried his face into her neck and hair. She heard him take long ragged breaths trying to slow down his heart rate and his breathing, she could feel the wetness of fallen tears on her skin. She wrapped her arms around him placing a hand at the nape of his neck slowly running her fingers through the short hair there. The other hand went to the small of his back and she noticed that he was drenched in sweat. How long had he been dreaming before she had woken him up?

"You're okay. You're safe. Everything's alright." She whispered in his ear but she wasn't sure it was helpful. Haley was not okay, she was dead, and despite the fact that they had been divorced and Aaron had moved on, she knew nothing could ever make that right. So she stopped talking and just let him find whatever comfort he could in her.

After several minutes his breathing had quieted and he lay still on top of her. Beth might have wondered if he had fallen back asleep but she could feel his eyelashes on the sensitive skin of her neck everytime he blinked. So she stayed silent with him only letting her fingers move in small circles at the nape of his neck.

"You were there too." Was the first thing he said.

Beth wasn't sure what he meant. Hotch cleared his throat and pushed himself off of her. "It was that day. With Haley and Jack. But you and Luna were there too and I was just as helpless. Just as scared. And it felt so intensely real. I used to get dreams about that day a lot, but they've been less common as time has passed, and I've never gotten one while I was in bed with you.

"The anniversary of her death was only a couple weeks ago not to mention you're overworked and under-rested. You're stressed, Aaron. And you miss her. And all of that is normal. Tell me what I can do to help."

"Just by being here you bring me more peace and comfort than you'll ever know. I'm gonna take a shower."

Hotch got out of bed and grabbed clean pajamas before heading into the bathroom to start the shower. Beth noticed the sweat stains on his side of the bed so she got up and put clean sheets on the bed before he came back. Luna had miraculously remained sleeping throughout the ordeal but it was nearing her usual feeding time so Beth gently removed her from her bassinet and changed her diaper to help wake her up to nurse.

Beth was sitting up in bed feeding the baby and watching Friends when Hotch came back into their bedroom with wet hair and fresh pajamas on.

"I wasn't sure if you'd be able to go back to sleep right away so I turned on the TV. But I can turn it back off?" She had hesitated with the decision to turn it on in the first place, not sure if he'd want to talk or if he'd want to sleep or if he'd be grateful for the distraction from what had taken place.

Hotch shook his head. "This is perfect. I don't mind that background noise - even if it is a laugh track to jokes that aren't even funny."

"Hey now! I happen to think the jokes are hilarious. But I'll put on a sleep timer so it doesn't stay on all night."

"Did I wake her up?" He asked, gesturing to Luna. His tone was back to being serious.

"No, I woke her up to feed her before we go back to bed. Hopefully this way she'll sleep through to the morning."

They sat in bed, quietly enjoying the mindless TV despite the ungodly hour. Eventually Luna drifted back to sleep and Beth laid her down in her bassinet. She pulled the covers back over herself and curled up next to Hotch, resting her head against his chest. Hotch wrapped his arms around her and kept her tight to his body and soon they both fell back to sleep. When they both woke up 4 hours later they were still in each other's arms.


End file.
